notjustbarbra

Holiday Decor

2011-12-20T22:31:00.000-08:00

This post is part of Jen on the Edge's Holiday Homes Tour. Thanks for hosting, Jen!

I participated in 2008 and 2009 as well.

I'd like to start by welcoming you to my home in sunny Southern California!

Come on in!

As you step through the front door, you find yourself in the living room/formal dining room. Make yourself at home!

Our Christmas tree is to your right, positioned in the front corner of our house, by the windows.

We have a lot of ornaments, and we love our bedecked tree!

So many ornaments are associated with a particular memory or vacation! One of our more recent acquisitions is this ornament from Crater Lake.

As you can see, in the living room portion of this big room we have two areas: a sitting area/fireplace and a console table along the wall.

The nativity was a gift from The Hubby's grandma, and the Nutcracker art pieces on each side of the mirror were made by Middle Girl and The Boy at their after-school art class. I made the stockings years ago, for each child's first Christmas. I made The Hubby's one of the in-between years. My stocking was made for me by my Great Aunt when I was a baby.

The end table is holding our toy nativity set. When the kids were toddlers, they wanted to play with all of the decorations and ornaments. I got them their own nativity and their own little tree with safe ornaments, so they could decorate and re-decorate to their hearts' content, leaving my things alone. The kids are old enough to be careful with the "real" decorations, so they don't need the toys anymore (sob!). I put the toy nativity set out anyway!

The little tree, however, is serving a new purpose on the console table. I got lights for it this year, and we decorated it with some of our small, special ornaments.

Also on this table is Big Girl's advent tree (more on this later), our Christmas card holder, and each kid's little "matchbox"-style music box.

In the dining area of the room, the Santa-hat chair covers catch the eye. They were a gift from The Hubby's grandma many years ago.

We also have a table runner made by my mom, and some green glass pillar-shaped candle votives given to me by a friend. The aesthetic I'm going for here is "bright and cheery!"

The kids love to play with the checkers set.

In the main bathroom, I put a few small touches. Our little snowman family, which I just love!

The ornament towel goes well over my new striped hand towel!

This is the kid art wall! We are enjoying this display of the art they've done at school over the years...

We have lots of decorative items that "Countdown to Christmas." This is helpful, because all three kids want to be the one to change the day every day!

We've had the snowman countdown for many years. The kids love to hang the numbers on!

The kids have been asking for chocolate advent calendars for years.

The Santa circle was a party favor last year at Middle Girl's friend's birthday party.

The "hands" one was made by The Boy at school this year.

I gave the tree to Big Girl as a gift last year. It's a music box as well! Each day you take an ornament out of the drawer and add it to the tree. On Christmas Day you add the star on top. She cherishes it! It will decorate her own house someday...

This year, Middle Girl and The Boy each made a ceramic gingerbread house in art class. I love them!

Thanks for visiting! It's been lovely sharing holiday decor with everyone! As we leave, I see that it's gotten dark.

I wanted to put another string of lights on the garland over the window, but I didn't find the time this year. Maybe next year, it'll look like this:

(photo edited as an homage to Bossy.)

Multicolored or red & green?

Book review: A Band of MiSFits.

2011-09-25T15:01:00.000-07:00

Still working on turning my notes about the books I read this summer into blog posts...

I let my inner fangirl choose a book, and she enthusiastically chose A Band of MiSFits by Andrew Baggarly.

Oh my goodness, what a JOY it was to read this book!

This is the story of the 2010 San Francisco Giants' Championship season. Of course, I knew there was a happy ending coming, since I experienced the playoff wins and the World Series wins and the celebrations!!!1! (Well, not live and in person, but on TV and with my family, geographically in Dodger country but proud Giants fans.)

My story as a baseball fan begins when I was six years old or so, when my family began attending California Angels games. The General Admission seats were inexpensive in those days, so we used to go over there on a regular basis, buy tickets at the stadium, and enjoy the game from the upper deck on the first base side. My dad taught me how to score games during those years. I knew all of the players' names, numbers, and positions by heart. I listened to the radio broadcast every night as I fell asleep. Girly little me, oh how she loved those Angels!

Fred Lynn, Don Baylor, Reggie Jackson, Rod Carew.

I loved these guys.

My favorite player was Fred Lynn. I drew pictures of him, and I think I mailed them to him at the stadium. (I think??) One year in the All-Star Game, he hit a grand slam home run! You should have seen my celebrating in my family room!

Fred Lynn, California Angel.

We were at the game when Reggie Jackson hit his 500th home run. The Royals beat the Angels 10 to 1 that game: September 17, 1984, which was not long after I spent two solid weeks attending volleyball and gymnastics events at the Olympics here in LA (another hugely formative experience for me - deserving of a post of its own).

My dad slept in line to get us tickets for the playoffs in 1982 and 1986. My kids could never picture him doing something like that based on how they know him today, but I keep trying to tell them how many great experiences he gave his children when we were their age.

Fred Lynn went to play for the Baltimore Orioles, which was a loss-of-innocence experience for me. How can you just go play for some other team? What was a young Angels fan who loved Fred Lynn supposed to do? To which would I keep my allegiance? Then, I hit the teenage years. I was busy with theater and I seemed to shed some of my "childhood" loves. I stopped watching and listening to baseball games, and my show schedule meant I couldn't attend the games any more.

I still hate it when players switch teams, and I know that I have never since let myself love a player like I loved Fred Lynn, because I know that that player might leave in a few years to play somewhere else. Psychological walls.

After several baseball-free years, which I spent rooting for my high school basketball team (I nourished an unrequited crush on one tall, thin red-headed player in particular), I started college in the Bay Area. That Spring, someone in my freshman dorm arranged an outing to a San Francisco Giants game. There, I found a new team to root for, and a new favorite player: Will Clark. As he was a slugger like Fred Lynn, I kind of couldn't help it.

Will Clark, San Francisco Giant.

Also breaking down my baseball-related psychological walls was the guy in our group (from New York) who clearly thought that because I was a girl, I must know nothing about baseball. I found his 'helpful' lessons about baseball on the drive to the stadium both hilarious and insulting. I was determined to show him what a jackass he was to be making the assumption. Somebody had a scorecard (or book), so I proceeded to score the game (thanks, Dad!). The guy was shocked that I knew how - clearly this blew his mind. To further prove myself, I talked about my Angels - the players I loved, the games I attended and scored, the nights spent listening to the radio broadcast in the dark in my pink room. Those feelings came back and I wanted to follow a team again. The Giants and Will Clark were there for me. (It also helped that I had recently fallen in love, with a cute boy who was a big Giants fan.)

I enjoyed those first two seasons as a Giants fan very much! Then there was a players' strike, and I also discovered the NHL and focused my attention on the Sharks - my pro team of choice in those years. (Underneath all of this is my never-ceasing love for my college teams. Stanford players don't often leave school early for the draft, and don't leave for other teams like pro players do. I feel safe being a Stanford fan, and I watch every football game, every year. Those players make my inner fangirl happy. Go Cardinal!)

Well, friends, I married that Giants fan, and even though I wasn't terribly passionate about the team anymore, he sure was. And has been. And ever shall be. You know the kind of fan who reads everything he can about his team? Checks the radio (now the internet) as soon as he can, to get a score update? Reads about them all off-season? No? Well, I sure do.

Then the steroid stuff happened. Times were ugly in baseball, between the missed season and then the steroid scandals. Who would want to admit to being a baseball fan? Not me.

Time heals, though. I got to the point where I was happy for The Hubby when the Giants were doing well. I was kind of annoyed when the Giants were not doing so well and it was affecting his mood, but he was okay at hiding that from me.

In the summer of 2010, we were at a friend's wedding, chock full of Giants fans (so much so that one of them is a Giants employee). They were all talking to the Hubby about the team. What was going on here? One of the guys told me that my husband was refusing to say they could make a run at the pennant - was he protecting himself from getting his hopes up? Hmmm. I started to pay a little more attention.

The end of the season was a nail-biter. The Giants managed to steal the pennant from the Padres, but it didn't happen until the very last game of the season. I convinced my husband, who had been staying at home to watch the games to witness it if they did it, that maybe they would win if he didn't watch. And I was right! They were headed to the playoffs!

At this point, I became adamant that he be able to watch every Giants post-season game on TV. I love him, and he has always loved the Giants, so this was important to me! I did all of the driving-kids-to-practices-and-picking-them-up. I kept up to speed on all of the games by either checking my smart phone ESPN app repeatedly or listening to the radio in the car. Somehow, against the odds, they beat the Braves, and then the Phillies, and were in the World Series!

And I had become a fan. I knew all of the players' names, and I had lots of favorites. Buster Posey, Brian Wilson, Tim Lincecum, Matt Cain, Madison Bumgarner, Freddy Sanchez, Cody Ross, Aubrey Huff...

As a family, we watched the World Series games against the Texas Rangers. The kids made "Go Giants" and "SF" decorations for around the TV. We won Games 1 and 2 in San Francisco. We lost Game 3 in Texas.

Game 4 was Halloween, and the series was 2-1 SF. My son insisted that he wanted Daddy to take him trick-or-treating, and in the best display of fatherhood I have ever witnessed, Daddy did.

Mommy stayed home to hand out candy, and watched the heck out of that game. What a game! Madison Bumgarner, age 21, gave an amazing pitching performance. Daddy made it home in time to see the Giants win, making the series 3-1.

On Monday, November 1, 2010, in Game 4 of the World Series, in Arlington, Texas, was a pitching showdown between Cy Young winners Tim Lincecum and Cliff Lee. The Giants batters managed to get some guys on base, and Edgar Renteria homered to bring in three runs. Closer Brian Wilson finished off the Rangers, and it had actually happened! The first Giants championship since 1954. The first since moving to San Francisco. Beautiful! Glorious!

The Giants fans called this season "Torture." This is because the Giants didn't win easily. They won messily, but they never gave up. The team consisted of rookies, freaks, has-beens, and waiver acquisitions. Nobody thought he was better than his teammates, not even Rookie of the Year Buster Posey, or two-time Cy Young winner Tim Lincecum, or media-attracting weirdo Brian Wilson and his magical beard. The clubhouse chemistry was remarkable. They were good guys, there for each other and for love of the game. The perfect bunch of guys for that crazy city of San Francisco, and they knew it, and they loved it, too.

I found that the more I watched those guys play, and celebrate, and share it with their fans, the more I felt my psychological walls weakening. I had to admit that I was a fan, and I had to admit that I wanted it that way.

Just look at the way they support each other!

The 2011 baseball season started, and found that I wanted to watch every game. No one was more surprised than my husband that every night I wanted to watch the game after the kids went to bed, rather than our usual TV. Every baseball season of our marriage up to that point, I had rolled my eyes at my husband and told him it was stupid to follow so closely during the first months of a 162-game season, and now I was the one putting the game on. He just silently enjoyed it, not wanting to jeopardize whatever was going on with his wife by pointing it out.

We knew things weren't going to be easy. Giants baseball = Torture, after all, and we fans love it. But we couldn't have foreseen what this season would have in store. On May 25, catcher and reigning Rookie of the Year Buster Posey's leg was severely fractured during a collision at the plate. His season was over. We were watching (of course), and we felt sick. The Hubby and I were planning to spend the majority of 2011 watching Buster's second season in the bigs, and in one moment that was no longer an option. Yeah, first world problems, but we were sad, okay?

The Giants soldiered on without Buster, guys were called up and rose to the occasion, but there were more setbacks to come. Freddy Sanchez's season soon came to an end. Guys were on the DL left and right. But the pitchers continued to dominate while the offense was struggling. Added to my list of favorite players was Ryan Vogelsong, back pitching for the Giants after years playing in Japan and showing that a guy in his mid-thirties can reinvent himself. Game after game, these guys continued to support one another and were focused on improving. They played well enough to occupy the top spot in the NL West for most of the season, but injuries and a hitting slump proved to be too much.

For me, it has been a pleasure and a privilege to call myself a Giants fan this year. The grit, the integrity, the love for the game, the team mentality, the unwillingness to start placing blame in the face of setbacks: I am so proud of my team. They didn't let their difficulties get them down, but came out there every night and enjoyed supporting each other. This team mindset paid off for them in 2010, and I was sorry I didn't watch that whole season unfold in 2010. I made up for it in 2011, watching nearly every game (via the internet). I was quite the spectacle to behold for everyone who knows me! What also helped was reading A Band of MiSFits - I was able to experience the entire 2010 season through the book! It was written in such a way that 1) I felt like I lived through the season, and 2) I was able to get to know the players' personalities and back stories. I had warily noticed that I was starting to feel about them the way I had felt about Fred Lynn, but the book made me want to feel that way! I let my fangirl love continue to grow.

So thank you, Giants players. Thank you for allowing me to feel like a kid again, and for helping me to strip away years of cynicism toward pro baseball players and psychological walls, and to remember what baseball used to mean to me. I am so glad that the Showtime series allowed others to get to know you, and it's no surprise to me that so many of them became new fans. You already had a huge, proud SF fan base that packs AT&T Park, and you guys have always acknowledged its role in your successes. What a great example of the right attitude to have as a true team of pro athletes.

I never stopped watching your games, even as you struggled through some difficult losing streaks, and I'm watching game 159 right now. You've got three more, and I'll be there. It's not just my way of thanking you. It's also for me - I just like watching you play!

Buster Posey: love you. Miss you. So sorry you've been away from baseball so long due to this injury (probably the longest time you've ever gone without playing baseball). Glad you got to spend it with your newborn twins. Can't wait to watch you again next year!

Cain, Vogelsong, Wilson, Sandoval, and Lincecum: 2011 All-Star Game

Giants pitchers: You guys were awesome this year. You know it, the hitters know it, and we fans sure know it. Because of you, I vastly prefer a game with a good pitching performance over a high-scoring game.
Panda: the way you play shows that you are in this sport for the joy of playing the game. It does my cynical heart good to watch you.

Timmy: I love the way you pitch.

Brian Wilson: people think you're crazy. I say yes: crazy like a fox.

You want to have a long baseball career, and you believe that having a star personality will help you achieve that goal.

You want to have a long baseball career, and you believe that will take hard work. You are some kind of goofball (we're not sure what kind), but you take your career seriously. You put in the discipline and the effort, and you have an intellectual approach to working on your baseball skills.

(He's smart. You can tell.)

(See what I mean?)

And I just like lookin' at ya.

Definitely better with the beard.

But the big question this year is, why did I become such a big Nate Schierholtz fan? He's not one of the big stars, but I always looked for his name on the starting lineup.

He got a lot more playing time than usual this season, since a lot of guys were on the DL. And what did he do with his at-bats? Pretty consistently, he got himself on base. Plus, he's great defensively - a strong (muscle-y... :-) ) outfielder. He gets to the ball quickly and has a great arm.

And... I'm a little sheepish to admit it, but...

Look at those shoulders. The long name highlights them nicely, doesn't it?

And... hmmm... maybe there's something else as well...

Nate batting

Fred Lynn batting

Nate fielding

Fred Lynn fielding

Full circle. BOOM.

Movie review: Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, Part 2

2011-08-18T00:43:00.000-07:00

I saw Harry Potter 7.2 back when it came out, and jotted down lots of notes. It's taken me a while to get this post together.

I saw the movie by myself, just as I did with Harry Potter 6. I did find myself in tears at times, which surprised me, because even though I love the Harry Potter series of books, I haven't felt sad about the series coming to an end. I'm not sure why I was moved to tears, but I will say that there are times when this film is truly masterful. The poignancy was inescapable, I guess!

The film is magnificent.
There were times when I was blown away by the gorgeous filmmaking:

The Battle for Hogwarts
Snape's memories
Harry's acceptance of his own death and conversation with his dead family members
The dream sequence with Dumbledore and Harry

Those last two are masterfully written, as well, and I recognized exact lines from the book. I just can't get over what Jo Rowling has created here. This is certainly hyperbole, but at one point I was thinking about what it must have been like to see Shakespeare's plays when they debuted. Did the people of his time really know how enduring those works would be?

It was interesting that they didn't even attempt to make the movie for non-fans... even I couldn't always remember what was going on and I just watched 7.1!

This film began right where 7.1 left off, with no 'beginning' of its own. As I said recently, I didn't care for the tone of 7.1 (too slow), so I was glad that the tone of 7.2 changed quickly - from the Gringotts bank scene, the pace quickened considerably, and the film remained quick and captivating to the end.

There were so many things I loved about this movie, but there were a few things that didn't work so well for me. My biggest complaint is about the scene after Harry killed Voldemort. He walked back into Hogwarts, where everyone was sitting around tending to the wounded and slain, but everyone just sort of glanced at Harry and had no reaction. That didn't make sense to me - they would have known that if Harry was walking through, something must be going on!

I also have never quite felt the Harry and Ginny relationship. I can't picture what their life together would be like, even after seeing them in the epilogue.

Speaking of the epilogue, I just felt that it needed a bit more. They were kind of just standing there - and there was not much dialogue. It made me wonder about their lives, their jobs, and their friendships. Do the two couples spend most of their time with each other?

As far as relationships go, the Harry/Hermione relationship seemed to trump all others. I could really feel the love of true friends. Perhaps it was that combination of (such fine) actors, although the written material was superb in this area as well. And as I said yesterday, relationships between characters are very important to me!

Ralph Fiennes was superb as Voldemort (although I'd like to see him in something where he looks like Quiz Show Ralph Fiennes once again).

I also loved Neville in this film. That character arc is a really interesting one in the books, and wasn't explored quite as fully in the films due to time constraints, but his growth was a bright spot in this one.

All in all, as I said, this was a masterful piece of moviemaking. Every time I think back on the acting, the cinematography, the production design, and of course the writing, I am in awe.

Movie review: The Adjustment Bureau

2011-08-17T12:28:00.000-07:00

I just finished watching The Adjustment Bureau, a new release we rented.

It is a very complicated, convoluted story, but fascinating. The men in hats (no women in the Bureau, I noticed) -- who are they and who do they work for? The answers to those two questions are made clear during the first half of the story, although it is fun trying to figure it out first. Once we know that, the rest of the story centers around whether the hero (David) will choose to work with them or rebel against them. Working against them seems impossible - will he even try? And if he does, can he possibly succeed? How would he even begin?

I like seeing how talented writer/storytellers tackle the big questions, and this film, based on a short story by Philip K. Dick, definitely riffs on some big questions. Satisfyingly. How cool.

There are some big plot holes that must be overlooked. (Huge: If the men in hats can freeze people and change their minds for them, why don't they just do that to David and Elise?) Sometimes, one is willing to overlook the holes, as I was for this film. I asked myself why I was willing to do so? In other films, I can't forgive the holes and they pull me right out of the story.

Self, the answer is:

The acting.

Specifically, the acting by Matt Damon as well as Emily Blunt.

These two talented actors created characters we love from their first moments on screen. Not only that, they created a relationship we care about. In this movie, it is particularly important that the audience care about the relationship itself. Without that investment, the whole thing falls apart. Matt Damon and Emily Blunt did an amazing job of this. Now that I think about it, Matt Damon always has great chemistry with his female counterparts. What a great actor. (I may as well admit it: he is a favorite of mine, and has been for forever.)

It made me realize: relationships between characters are really important to me. That's why I can't forgive Mockingjay (The Hunger Games), and I see that in most of my other reviews, too (including some that are forthcoming).

So if that is the case, why do I love (500) Days of Summer so? Its depiction of a relationship is arresting, but (SPOILER) the relationship doesn't work out. Yet I love love love that movie. The key here is that we end up seeing that we were experiencing the relationship from the point of view of one member. Once we are given the outside perspective, we see that it was not what it appeared. It's a really unique, layered film.

Some thoughts about summer 2011

2011-08-16T17:36:00.000-07:00

I may not be in a good frame of mind right now, and who knows, might respond differently in a week's time, but today I have been asking myself, "so how would you rate summer 2011?" and I might as well go ahead and come up with an answer.

Summer should be a balance of scheduled activities (with experiences that you don't get at school), unstructured time, visits with friends and family, travel, and special treats (staying up late watching a movie with the kids, walking down the street for frozen yogurt after dinner, etc.). And I have to say, I don't think I got the balance right this year.

I think we haven't had enough scheduled activities and have erred on the side of too much unstructured time. I would say that that is due to not enough pre-planning on my part. It's hard to go do some fun activity when you don't start trying to think of an idea until 10:30 am.

At the start of summer, I had some interesting ideas - plan theme days (such as "microscope day" or "Archimedes day") and invite friends to join in if they just bring the lunch; assign a week to each child and have them plan the adventures - but there wasn't time for that before Oregon. (As is our tradition, we headed up to Portland just after the fourth of July to spend a month with family.) However, there was time for that in Oregon, at least during the second half when the girls were done with acting camp. And then we came home from Oregon, such that there would be almost two weeks left of my summer. I thought it would be best not to put the kids in camps, so we could have a few outings and a lot of friends-over-to-swim days. This would have been a good time to do some pre-planning. Instead, what's been happening is a) the aforementioned trying-to-figure-out-each-day-after-it-has-already-started; and b) it turns out that all of our friends are out of town this week. Add to that the conundrum that I have some work I need to get done for the start of school and some house-organization projects that I'd like to do before the chaotic school schedule starts, yet want to spend my last week of summer actually celebrating summer, and I feel like I just can't win this week.

Maybe we should have divided up our summer differently. Maybe we should have shifted Oregon to later in the summer since all of our friends are away now that we are back. But it doesn't seem like coming back with no time before I have to be at work would be a good idea... although it's not going well as it is, so maybe...

I think I'm also feeling like we don't get to do enough travel. I'd love to give my kids a childhood in which they get to go see and experience lots of different places. Since we live far away from our family, we spend all of our vacation time with them, and it's definitely still not enough time. We never have the time, then, to go anywhere else (nor the funds - another issue entirely). This year, I'm starting to feel the "kids are getting older"/"running out of time"/"gotta start traveling" really start to set in. Maybe it's time to re-think the month-in-Oregon summer plan... but spending less time with their relatives would not be good for my kids either. Obviously, the old question of "should we move to Portland" is weighing heavily on my mind. It's not an easy question. We love our town, and our school, and neither my husband nor I should leave our jobs anytime soon.

It has been a nice summer, though. We started off with soccer camp for Middle Girl and The Boy, and followed that up with Girl Scout camp for both girls and basketball camp for The Boy. Then we had our big Fourth of July party, and my brother- and sister-in-law brought their three boys down from Oregon for a week to join in the fun. We went to Legoland with them and spent a few days swimming, going to the movies, etc. and then we all caravanned up to Portland.

In Portland, the girls went to acting camp for two weeks, and we also enjoyed cousin-time, had fun with Grandma and Granddad, welcomed my new niece to the world, and visited favorite local landmarks such as Multnomah Falls, Pioneer Square, Voodoo Doughnuts, Oaks Park, and OMSI (the science museum). We went to the Oregon History Museum and the Classical Chinese Garden for the first time. We visited old friends from college and high school, drove down to Eugene to see my Grandma, and spent two days in Seattle visiting friends and the music museum. Meanwhile, we fit in books, movies, crafts, baking, jazz concerts, baseball games, and learning how to wash a car.

Once again, I didn't make it to the mountain & alpine slide or to the beach & aquarium.

Since we got home, we have had some friends over and have met some other friends at the California Science Center. So we have done the kind of thing we were hoping to do, just not as much as we hoped. Also bumming me out: we are going to have to miss the big multi-family camping trip this year due to work-related scheduling yadda yadda.

I was trying to end this on a positive note, but since it got chronological and I'm feeling grumpy today, here we are. I'm ready to finish but it's kind of going (((THUNK))) which only makes me grumpier!

Tomorrow is another day. Perhaps I should go attempt some pre-planning...

Movie review: Buck

2011-08-16T14:37:00.000-07:00

Earlier this summer, we saw the documentary film Buck.

It follows a horse training expert (Buck) as he travels the country giving three-day workshops. In his workshops, he teaches the horse owners just as much about themselves as he does about their horses.

It is a terrific film, because it is a portrait of a person: a person with a history, relationships, hopes, a future. It got me thinking - you could make a film about anyone. We all have our stories, past experiences, personality quirks, and choices we've made in life that have contributed to the living, breathing people we have become.

Buck spends the better part of each year traveling alone, although his teenage daughter has begun to accompany him during her summer break. (These scenes are a particularly lovely depiction of a parent-child relationship.) Very introverted in his younger days, he has been somewhat alone even when among other people. All of this time spent alone gives him insights into the inner monologues of horses as well as people. There is an interesting section of the film where he sees straight into one woman in particular, and delivers her the tough-love words she so desperately needs to hear. Buck is so gentle, though, because he practices empathy. Maybe that's the way in which this film is something of a gift: as an exploration of an empathy-driven life.

There certainly are reasons why Buck is the way he is. We learn of his childhood, so full of fear and sadness. He knows how a horse feels when it is trained by whips, chains, and deprivation, and he knows how such a horse learns to think. Those are not his methods. His methods meet each horse where it is in that moment and work with its natural instincts. He was the advisor for the film "The Horse Whisperer," and we get a behind-the-scenes look at the making of the film, but this is not a film about a glamorous life. It's more of a peaceful, yet driven, life. A respect-filled life. Buck both gives and receives respect. Is this rare in movies? It shouldn't be, but I think it is. That, in and of itself, is interesting.

Non-fiction Book Review: Mindset

2011-08-15T14:27:00.000-07:00

One of the books I read this summer for work-related reasons was Mindset: The New Psychology of Success, by Carol S. Dweck, Ph.D.

I had heard a great deal about this book, and had attended a talk by Dr. Dweck, but this was the first time I read the book in its entirety.

It is about two very different ways of thinking: the growth mindset, and the fixed mindset. People with the growth mindset think that intelligent people work hard to learn: the obstacles are fun challenges and the journey has made the brain smarter. People with the fixed mindset think about intelligence as something you either have or don't have, and the journey through school is a series of tests designed to figure out who the smart ones are.

Chapters are primarily divided by topic, one exploring how the two mindsets affect education, while another explores how they affect sports, another business, and another relationships. In each chapter, Dweck gives examples of people with the two mindsets (celebrities, descriptions of patients, etc), explores how they handle successes and setbacks, and gives tips for "growing your mindset."

For that's the overarching message of the book. The growth mindset is shown to be the "right" mindset. It allows people to try new things without fear of failure or the expectation that they have to get it right immediately, appreciate effort and growth in others, and enjoy a higher degree of success in their chosen pursuits as a by-product of doing it for the enjoyment of the learning process rather than as a need to prove themselves. People with the growth mindset are better able to handle bouts of depression and have more successful personal relationships.

A person can, of course, be a mixture of mindsets. Dweck tells us early in the book that she will only discuss the two extremes of the spectrum for purposes of clarity. A person can also be growth-mindset in some areas (for example, in athletics) and fixed-mindset in others (for example, in the arts). For this reason, Dweck discusses examples in all areas to show that effective people in every area have been growth-mindset. There are wonderful sections highlighting business leaders, basketball coaches, violin teachers, and of course, classroom teachers and parents.

For me, it has been truly inspirational. As a teacher, I am growth-mindset.* I view learning as a life-long pursuit, one with no "winners" and "losers," just fellow travelers on this journey. I see my role as a facilitator, teaching my students how to learn and using assessments as tools to figure out what they can work on next. What I didn't realize was how my fixed-mindset students were seeing my assignments and assessments: as judgements of themselves as people. If they do poorly on one test, they might use that to determine "I am not good at science" and keep that self-label with them always. Being aware of this makes it much easier for me to work against it - deliberately teaching them how to interpret the tasks and test scores they receive from me.

As you can imagine, it is vital that a parent uses only growth-mindset language with their children, and it is so easy to do otherwise. We can do a lot of damage with the well-meaning but wrong kind of praise ("You're so smart! You figured that out so fast!" "You are so good at baseball! You learned to catch the ball without even trying!"). We need to praise their efforts, not their innate abilities. The wrong kind of praise teaches them that we value things that come naturally, and if they have to work hard to master something, it means they are not smart, or not good at it. Dweck recommends "You finished that so fast; you must need something more challenging to grow your brain" and "I like how you have been working so hard at learning to catch; you have been getting better all the time!"

As a parent, even one with a growth mindset, I find it easy to fall into the "you're so _____" trap! Reading this book has been a great reminder. I find I'm seeing fixed- vs. growth- mindset everywhere - while reading other books and movies, I'm thinking to myself "he is really growth-mindset." We'll see how long this effect lasts!

Mindset is a quick and easy read, presenting the psychological research findings in a conversational way. I recommend it - and have recommended it - to everyone. It really does apply in every arena, not just teaching and parenting but the workplace, dieting, attacking your to-do list, marriages, friendships, etc.

*Strangely, I tend to be fixed-mindset about myself, but no one else. I expect that everything I try should come easily and tend to give up too quickly. I vow to speak to myself with the same growth-oriented language that I use with my students and my children!

Live concert review: Sara Bareilles. OR, I wish I had earplugs.

2011-07-31T00:25:00.000-07:00

I went to hear Sara Bareilles in concert in Portland, Oregon. Lucky me!

When I bought the tickets, I decided to get four, because my daughters love to sing along to her CDs and the show said "All Ages" (they are 11 and 8), so that sounded like something they would love! We thought the fourth ticket could be for their Auntie Sarah (my sister-in-law), so we could make it a Girls' Night. We were all SO very excited!

What I didn't think through was the start time. 8 pm. With two opening acts.* That means that my 8-year-old daughter was having trouble keeping her eyes open before Sara even came out at 9:45 pm. That was my fault. I really should have thought that through. What wasn't my fault was the language. Apparently, Sara thinks it's titillating to use the F word. I myself don't think it's all that exciting. It's not rebellious, it's not edgy, it's cliche. I'm fine with hearing it, I'm just not impressed by it. Regardless, when the ticket clearly states "All Ages," there may be kids in the audience who don't enjoy hearing it. That's right, they don't think it's 'super cool' to hear it, it makes them uncomfortable. And that's all them, that's not my influence. So using it in every between-song-patter, and having the whole theater emphasize it while singing a song together, and talking about people having sex in the back row... these moments were not fun for the girls. They liked the music, but they had to try and wash those other moments from their minds. As a ticket buyer, I interpret "All Ages" to mean "All Ages."

* What is the deal with opening acts these days? The headliner seems to come on later these days than I remember. Two to three hours past the time on the ticket! That seems ludicrous to me! And I have seen some BORING opening acts lately. Can I start coming to the show two hours late? Does anybody do that, because I'd like to know if it's a viable option. As a musician myself, I don't want to show the opener such disrespect, but come on, waiting two hours through music I don't like is just too much. 45 minutes seems right to me.

My main reaction to the concert itself? Loud. PAINFULLY loud. Fingers-in-my-ears loud. I-can't-hear-any-actual-notes-I-can-only-hear-distortion-loud. Weird, because Sara is a musician. Not a 'rock star,' a beautiful musician. I'd like to be able to hear the music she is making, along with her talented band mates.

And now we're at the part where I gush.

LOVE. HUH.

She is so funny, and so beautiful, and WOW does she have an impressive vocal command, and HOO BOY the girls and I loved that she plays instruments (mainly a grand piano) as well. (We did already know that, but still it's such fun to watch live!)

I loved her audience rapport and stage presence. She had COMMAND of that big, historic concert hall! She played to every corner!

There were a few moments that were particularly memorable. I loved the different arrangements she did on some of the songs. I loved the creative uses of the band members (they are all so versatile!), for example, starting one song with all of them on various pianos/keyboards while she banged the bass drum and sang.

At one point, she and the band appeared in the first balcony (we were sitting near the front of the orchestra - Row M - so we could turn around and see them) and sang a capella with no microphones. The theater was so quiet, listening to their rendition of "Little Lion Man" by Mumford and Sons (I love that song) (also, though, this was one that has the prominent and repeated use of the F-word). Then we all started to sing along, although we could still hear Sara's killer voice through it all, and the sound was beautiful. (I also enjoyed the break from all the LOUD!)

There was the audience participation - teaching different parts of the audience how to sing the "ooo ooo" parts for "King of Anything" as well as provide the hand clap percussion section.

Not to mention the part when Sara commented that she loved it when the audience sang and then joked "you all can just sing and I'll just listen... actually you can play the piano for me too!" and a guy in the audience yelled, "I'll play the piano for you!" and then she invited him up to play. He was great. He played "Love Song" (even though she pointed out that song was coming later in the show; she said, "let's just do it twice!") and she sang. Then she pulled a few people up on stage to sing. When they all left, she said, "that was amazing. I've never done that before. That was something we'll all remember, so thank you."

I've since read that this has become extremely common - this letting someone from the audience come up and play/sing. I read a piece on NPR that said that celebrities basically can't say no, because they will incur the wrath of the internet if they do. I will point out that later in the show, someone else yelled out "can I come sing with you too?" and Sara said "I'm sorry, no, don't hate me" in her adorable way, and the person yelled, "that's okay, I love you!"

All in all, I'm very glad I went! I've now seen my two favorite female singer/songwriters this year (saw KT Tunstall in May - awesome)! The girls were so very tired, that we left when the encores began, but they were feeling happy. I hope that when they look back on this, the memories they have are of that young female musician, perfectly comfortable on that stage up in front of that crowd.

Three Movie Reviews: The '2' movies of summer 2011

2011-07-18T23:31:00.000-07:00

So far this summer, I have seen three new ‘2’ movies:

Kung Fu Panda 2

Cars 2

The Hangover 2

Kung Fu Panda 2:
Of the three, I’d say I liked this one best. It is in keeping with the artistic style of the original, and it advances the story of Po’s development into a Kung Fu master while simultaneously exploring Po’s back story. Into the future and into the past: a neat feat.

Just as any good sequel should do, certain things about the original were ‘bumped up a notch.’ The kung fu action sequences were more amazing and exciting, and the Asian Art – inspired visual choices were even more beautiful.

It left us with an intriguing premise for another sequel; and when I say intriguing, I mean clever, surprising, and exciting!

Cars 2:
Of the three sequels, this one was (no contest) the most different from the original. It is completely different in tone, pace, type of story… it just happens to have some of the same characters in it. Most of them are in what felt to me like the ‘B’ storyline, though. The ‘A’ storyline only utilizes one returning character – Tow Mater – and many new characters. It’s a LOT of Mater, and even in the first film I definitely felt that he is a character best appreciated in small doses. This one had Too Much Mater for me, for sure!
This movie is a spy comedy, a genre that I really like, so I'm on board with this re-booting of the franchise. I also liked the racing sequences, and thought the animation therein was eye-poppingly gorgeous. My particular favorite was the Italy scenery.
I did have a few problems with it other than Too Much Mater (and its accompanying Not Enough McQueen). I thought it was too fast-paced. We didn’t get any scenes where we could just enjoy the characters – everything was coming at us fastfastfast.
I thought the plot resolution was too confusing for the target audience. The bad guy is who again? And why was he masterminding all this? Pretending to promote alternative fuel while secretly sabotaging alternative fuel in order to drive up oil prices because he actually is trying to sell oil even though we thought he was out of the oil business? There’s one too many twists there, I think, and Sarge’s statement of “once big oil, always big oil” doesn’t make things any clearer!
I also thought the main moral, which seemed to be ‘stand by your friend no matter what,’ wasn’t terribly effective. McQueen felt bad for snapping at Mater when he acted like an obnoxious fool at a public event for McQueen’s professional career. We seem to be telling kids that obnoxiousness should be excused if we really love someone. I’m not on board with that message. How about 'I will always love you, but this behavior is not appropriate and I believe you can learn how to behave?' Not a terribly appealing moral, but that's one I would support.
My mom loved the idea that we should love our dents because they represent memories – I’ll agree with that one. That was cute.

The Hangover 2:
UGH.
I thought this movie was AWFUL. It was trying to be exactly like the original, but it didn’t even come close to being a poor imitator. It had none of the magic of the first movie. Such a disappointment.
What’s worse is that I don’t think I laughed once!

Book Review: The Eyre Affair

2011-07-17T23:23:00.000-07:00

I finally have a chance to report on the next book I read in my "Summer of Reading!"
This summer project is explained here.

Book Review:
The Eyre Affair
by Jasper Fforde

This book seemed like it was written particularly for me!

It’s witty, smart, literary, and has an element of mystery. There are many literary references (I’m sure I didn’t catch them all), but the main one is, of course, Jane Eyre, which is one of my top TWO favorite books of all time.

There is so much going on in this book! There are fantastical inventions, time travel that has changed the history and governments of the world, a society that worships Shakespeare and other literary figures above all, a secretive series of governmental departments (kind of like if there were lots of CIAs), people with mysterious abilities; I could go on and on.

There is a fascinating heroine: Tuesday Next. She is strong yet vulnerable, as well as undaunted by risks and danger. She takes us on an exciting ride, yet provides us with a love story so we can root for a happy ending.

There are several sequels, and I look forward to enjoying them! I’m not sure that they will feel quite as close to my heart as this one (the only book I love as much as Jane Eyre is Pride and Prejudice), but Tuesday’s adventures are so fast-paced, thrilling, and above all, cleverly written!

What did I love most about this book? I have to single out two things in particular. One is the pace at which we learn new things about this society - it’s exercise for the brain! The second is the giddy joy the author takes in wordplay. It’s clear he loves the way words sound together – and that he expresses that love more playfully than reverently. It’s just such fun to read!

I also loved that Tuesday’s life was mirroring the story in Jane Eyre, even outside of Jane Eyre itself! (Yes, I’m saying that part of the story takes place inside of ‘Jane Eyre’!)

Did I have any problems with the book? Well, in this world, Charlotte Brontë originally wrote a different ending to Jane Eyre, and it’s the characters in this book that change it to the ending we now know. I found that a little disappointing, being asked to believe that Brontë would have written the inferior version. My love for the classic novel is just too strong… It was definitely worth it, though, because the climax is so thrilling! In the end, I certainly didn’t hold it against this book. I still wanted the characters in this book to find out that Charlotte Brontë had intended this ending all along, and the time travelers had changed things, or something, but I admit that this approach made for a rip-roaring thrill ride of an adventure!

The Eyre Affair defies classification. Since it is an exciting combination of action and intelligence, I’d say that its uniqueness is a definite selling point!

Movie review: The King's Speech

2011-07-03T16:39:00.000-07:00

The King's Speech well deserved its Oscars.

What a finely crafted movie, making speech therapy enthralling.* Employing masterful cuts to make a halting political speech gripping. There were lots of pauses in each sentence of the speech, while the stammerer worked through his techniques, but the pauses were well utilized. The same was true of the earlier speeches, where we could experience the discomfort of listeners and speaker alike.

(* It's quite a feat! I can say that because I have been through speech therapy.)

I cannot say enough about the work of Colin Firth. This was acting, tremendous acting, acting with every muscle, without a hint of scenery-chewing. Bravo, sir.

I found the story fascinating as a history, and also as a portrait of a unique friendship.

A remarkable film!

Audiobook review: Bossypants

2011-07-02T16:38:00.000-07:00

Bossypants
written and recorded by Tina Fey

This was the first audiobook I have listened to in 15 years or so.

Bossypants is a memoir. I thought it was going to be more of a humor book, but it is definitely a memoir: it starts with her childhood, and tells us about her life in chronological order.

It is, as expected, funny. It's like hearing a friend tell you her life story, and isn't that what we love about Tina Fey? There are many little gems included when comedy-writer Tina shines through, from her responses to internet commenters to her fashion advice. Ah, Tina. She is a treasure!

My absolute favorite excerpt is "The Mother's Prayer for Its Daughter," which I had seen on the internet before I read (well, heard) the book. It's gold; it's just absolutely perfect. I hope it's okay (since it's all over the internet) to post it here at the end of the post...

While listening to Tina Fey's recording, rather than reading the book, was fun, I actually think I would have laughed more if I had been reading it myself. I'm back to books! With paper!

"The Mother's Prayer For Its Daughter" by Tina Fey:

First, Lord: No tattoos. May neither Chinese symbol for truth nor Winnie-the-Pooh holding the FSU logo stain her tender haunches.

May she be Beautiful but not Damaged, for it’s the Damage that draws the creepy soccer coach’s eye, not the Beauty.

When the Crystal Meth is offered, May she remember the parents who cut her grapes in half And stick with Beer.

Guide her, protect her

When crossing the street, stepping onto boats, swimming in the ocean, swimming in pools, walking near pools, standing on the subway platform, crossing 86th Street, stepping off of boats, using mall restrooms, getting on and off escalators, driving on country roads while arguing, leaning on large windows, walking in parking lots, riding Ferris wheels, roller-coasters, log flumes, or anything called “Hell Drop,” “Tower of Torture,” or “The Death Spiral Rock ‘N Zero G Roll featuring Aerosmith,” and standing on any kind of balcony ever, anywhere, at any age.

Lead her away from Acting but not all the way to Finance. Something where she can make her own hours but still feel intellectually fulfilled and get outside sometimes And not have to wear high heels.

What would that be, Lord? Architecture? Midwifery? Golf course design? I’m asking You, because if I knew, I’d be doing it, Youdammit.

May she play the Drums to the fiery rhythm of her Own Heart with the sinewy strength of her Own Arms, so she need Not Lie With Drummers.

Grant her a Rough Patch from twelve to seventeen. Let her draw horses and be interested in Barbies for much too long, For childhood is short – a Tiger Flower blooming Magenta for one day – And adulthood is long and dry-humping in cars will wait.

O Lord, break the Internet forever, That she may be spared the misspelled invective of her peers And the online marketing campaign for Rape Hostel V: Girls Just Wanna Get Stabbed.

And when she one day turns on me and calls me a Bitch in front of Hollister, Give me the strength, Lord, to yank her directly into a cab in front of her friends, For I will not have that Shit. I will not have it.

And should she choose to be a Mother one day, be my eyes, Lord, that I may see her, lying on a blanket on the floor at 4:50 A.M., all-at-once exhausted, bored, and in love with the little creature whose poop is leaking up its back.

“My mother did this for me once,” she will realize as she cleans feces off her baby’s neck. “My mother did this for me.” And the delayed gratitude will wash over her as it does each generation and she will make a Mental Note to call me. And she will forget. But I’ll know, because I peeped it with Your God eyes.

Stage review: Les Miserables

2011-07-01T22:21:00.000-07:00

We went to see the 25th anniversary production of Les Miserables. We both love this show, and while we weren't sure the younger kids are quite old enough, we didn't want to pass up this opportunity for them to see it. So we bought enough seats to take the whole family, which cost a pretty penny. It cost so much that it was a major decision for us! It was like, "vacation or Les Miserables?"

We were able to have this event serve as Big Girl's birthday present as well, so that was nice! She learned about the story (which made her nervous- she's squeamish about death and fighting) and listened to the soundtrack. She ended up being VERY excited about seeing the show!

I did not realize that it would be a restaged production. Instead of having the iconic turntable stage, it has a more traditional set and staging. I did like the new backdrops, based on watercolors by Victor Hugo. They were beautiful and really did set the mood. The backdrops were animated at times, moving us through Paris, which was really cool.

Overall, it was wonderful. I mean, it's Les Miserables after all! I loved how the audience cheered for the opening BUM, BUM BUMMM! by the orchestra - definitely an audience of theatre fans! The music was exhilarating and the ending made me cry. A great Les Miserables experience.

Big girl loved it. Middle girl liked it very much, but had bad dreams of battle scenes that night. The Boy was bored, so I whispered the plot in his ear during the second act. He enjoyed it more that way.

In general, aside from the cool backdrops, I liked the original version better. It's more iconic with the revolving turntable and the minimalist sets - this one was more like other shows. I also felt the battle scenes were less impactful without seeing both sides of the barricade.

The singing was very shout-y in this production. It must have been a direction, because everyone in the cast was turned up to 11. I don't agree with that choice. If you have quiet moments in the song, it gives the powerful notes so much more impact. These songs were sung with such intensity on EVERY NOTE that it all ran together. A shame.

The exception to this was Eponine. I really enjoyed her interpretation of the songs; it's interesting that she was the understudy. I also enjoyed the performances of Marius and Cosette more than I usually do.

The most shouting was done by Fantine. EVERY SYLLABLE!!!

I recommend seeing Les Miserables. It does a good job of being Les Miserables! But you might want to bring earplugs...

The Hunger Games trilogy: Catching Fire and Mockingjay

2011-06-29T21:01:00.000-07:00

Today I continue discussing the Hunger Games trilogy, the first book of which I discussed so exhaustively yesterday. This is part of my Summer of Reviews, explained here.

Book review:
Catching Fire
by Suzanne Collins

Book review:
Mockingjay
by Suzanne Collins

As I concluded yesterday, The Hunger Games sets us up to follow the heroine, Katniss Everdeen, on two character arcs.
One - The journey toward self-awareness in terms of her emotions. Katniss has been living in survival mode for all of her formative years, and her emotional maturity is stunted. We are set up to expect growth from her in this area, as she learns to identify the way she feels toward Peeta, Gale, Haymitch, Cinna, and her mother.
Two - The journey toward self-awareness in terms of her unique talents, and her discovery of how she can use those talents. Everyone in Panem is captivated by her inner fire. We expect to see her becoming the leader of a noble cause: the toppling of this horrifically unjust society.

The titles of Books Two and Three in the trilogy give us an inkling of how the story will play out:

Book Two is called Catching Fire. Throughout The Hunger Games, fire is a symbol of Katniss herself. Therefore, naming the book Catching Fire indicates that the ideals she stands for will start to take root in the hearts and minds of the people in the districts. Not only that, but Katniss will start to see that she has these gifts for inspiring people, and that she may be able to use them to cause change.
(She does not yet know what ideals she stands for, but the way she instinctively reacts to situations makes it clear what they are. In addition, she has Peeta and others in her life who are more aware of what they stand for, and can help her explore her own positions.)

Book Three is called Mockingjay. The mockingjay is an important symbol in The Hunger Games as well. To Katniss, it is a reminder of her father. To Katniss and others, it symbolizes the limitations of the Capitol's seeming omnipotence. To those inclined to see it, it can symbolize the hope that, like the mockingjay, an alternate society can find a way to survive despite the efforts of the Capitol. Therefore, it seems that this book will tell the story of the overthrow of the Capitol and triumph of a new society, one based on the humanistic ideals of both Katniss and Peeta.

As I have argued, this is the story foreshadowed by the character development in The Hunger Games as well as the titles Collins gave to the rest of the trilogy.
Now that I have actually read them, I see that that is not the story Collins intended to tell after all (assume for the time being that she had the whole story planned all along). Catching Fire seems to continue along that path, and then Mockingjay throws various curveballs in the story's way. The curveballs could be interesting ways to ultimately arrive at the same conclusion, so I held out hope until the very end.
It saddens me to report that the Hunger Games trilogy does not get there. It goes someplace else entirely. Instead of being a story about teenagers using their innate gifts and idealism to change their world, it is a story of how war ruins lives and destroys even the seemingly strongest survivors. I am not exaggerating when I say that Collins completely destroys every single character she so effectively made us care about. She utterly tears them down and leaves them in ruins. Had I known that, I would not have signed on to invest my time and emotions in taking this journey with Katniss. And because I feel so strongly that we were set up to take another journey entirely, I actually feel angry.

That's right. I vehemently dislike Mockingjay, and therefore the trilogy as a whole, and therefore I do NOT recommend reading these books. Unless they completely rewrite the story for the movies, and I hope they do (but with Suzanne Collins so centrally involved, they probably won't), I can't recommend them either.

Final verdict: this trilogy fails, because the reader is blindsided. That's not good writing, and it's not good storytelling.

THE SPECIFICS:
(may contain spoilers)

Well, I wrote up my thoughts about each book, but blogger lost them, and now ... I just can't.

The Hunger Games trilogy: The Hunger Games

2011-06-28T13:13:00.000-07:00

This is my Summer Of Reviews. Explained here.

Wow, this review is LONG. I won't have this much to say about the other two books in the Hunger Games trilogy. I felt like I had to cover both my review of this book and the expectations it built up for the trilogy as a whole. It's a pretty unwieldy blog post (!), but the basic portions are as follows:

BACKGROUND - why I read it

TRANSITION TO REVIEW - should kids read it?

REVIEW: SUMMARY OF BASIC PREMISE

MY THOUGHTS ON THE BASIC PREMISE

REVIEW: THE CHARACTERS - they are why I cared... why I am writing so much!

REVIEW: THE MAIN ARC OF THE STORY - what is this book trying to say?
(or, What should the point of the trilogy be? / What does the point of the trilogy seem like it's going to be?)

DO I RECOMMEND IT?

________

Review:
The Hunger Games
by Suzanne Collins

BACKGROUND:
Last fall, the final book in the Hunger Games trilogy (Mockingjay) came out, and there was a lot of buzz about its release. As they had done with the Harry Potter and Twilight installments, bookstores arranged special events for the official release time and young people planned to stay up all night reading. Through blogs and facebook, I saw that there were many people my age who were excited about the series as well.

Then in the spring, my fifth-grade daughter mentioned that her school library had re-classified the Hunger Games books, and were allowing fifth graders to check them out. Many of the fifth-graders had already read them and the talk seemed to be that this series was the thing to read.

My daughter had heard the premise: teenagers sent to an arena and required to fight to the death. The mere thought threatened to give her nightmares, but her classmates told her it was really good. She asked my opinion. I told her that I, too, was a little bit trepidacious about the premise, but that I was interested in reading it. Her response was, "I'll check it out for you to read, and you can tell me if it is scary." (My report back: "definitely scary." She actually seemed relieved to decide "not gonna read it.")

TRANSITION TO REVIEW:

Violent. Gruesome. Brutal. The basic set-up of the story insures that upwards of twenty teenagers will be killed. Not "will die," but "will be killed." By each other. Teenagers killing each other while a country watches on TV. Does this sound to you like something eleven-year-olds should be reading? It sure doesn't to me. But maybe this book is not intended for eleven-year-olds, and their parents, teachers, and librarians should be instructing them to wait a few years. Just because a child is at an 8th-grade reading level doesn't mean he or she should be reading books written for 8th graders... Let's be careful with our children. Once they see, hear, or read something, it can't be un-seen...

Putting that aside, since I hope it's clear where I stand on that, I asked myself a different question: does this sound like something an 8th-grader should be reading? After reading this book, I felt strongly about my answer. That answer was "it depends."

It depended on where this story went in the rest of the trilogy. In my opinion, this could be a fantastic trilogy for middle schoolers (not to mention older teenagers and adults), *** IF *** it went in a certain direction. I was so excited to read the other two books and see if that was the author's plan all along. I had to wait until school was out to have the time, but I found it so hard to wait!

REVIEW: SUMMARY OF BASIC PREMISE
As The Hunger Games begins, we meet its central character, sixteen-year-old Katniss Everdeen. We also learn about the country of Panem, the North America of some future time period. Panem consists of thirteen districts and a central governing region called the Capitol. Each district has a certain industry (for example, District 3's is electronics and machines, District 4's is fishing, District 8's is textiles, District 11's is agriculture, and District 12's is coal mining). The Capitol takes the products from the districts, and although certain districts are favored by the Capitol and have strong and healthy citizens (Districts 1 and 2), most districts are places of poverty and hunger. The Capitol citizens live lives of luxury and excess.

At some point in Panem's history (roughly 75 years ago), the districts attempted to overthrow the central government. In retaliation, the Capitol blew District 13 off the map to scare the other districts and keep them in line. After the failed revolt, the Capitol was more determined than ever to weaken the districts. One of the steps they took was establishing the annual Hunger Games as a symbol and reminder to the people of Panem that the Capitol will spare no one, not even children, in order to keep its control over the districts.

One boy and one girl from each of the twelve districts, between the ages of 12 and 18, are sent to the Hunger Games each year. They are put into an arena and must fight until only one child remains. That child is crowned the victor, and is rewarded by never having to go hungry again.

The Hunger Games are televised, as are the various ceremonies, interviews, and events surrounding the Games. All citizens of Panem are required to watch. Unlike the fanatical Capitol residents, the residents of the districts hate the Games, but have to act like they enjoy them. (The exception is the "Career" districts, which have the resources to train their children for the Games, so that by the time they are old enough, the children most likely to win volunteer for the Games.)

MY THOUGHTS ON THE BASIC PREMISE:
Okay, so we've got a dystopian society, and the ultimate version of a horrific reality competition show. Don't put too much thought into this world, however, because it doesn't stand up very well to analysis. For example, how big are these districts? Panem is supposed to cover all of North America, and is divided into thirteen districts. We are given some ideas about the geography: Twelve is in Appalachia, Seven is in the Pacific Northwest, the Capitol is in the Rocky Mountains, etc. However, they seem to be the size of a city, both in mileage and in population. Also, there are inconsistencies in terms of the technology of Panem. They are advanced in some ways and old-school in others.

It's not hard, though, to put the analysis aside and just 'go with it.' We readers are drawn into the story when Katniss volunteers to take her younger sister Prim's place in the Hunger Games, and we turn the pages in breathless anticipation of the outcome. Katniss is certain that she is being sent to her death, since there has only been one Victor from Twelve in the history of the Games. Twelve is the poorest district, and its undernourished, underprepared tributes never survive long in the arena.

REVIEW: THE CHARACTERS
Katniss is not going alone, however. With her are the boy tribute from Twelve, her mentor (the previous Victors mentor the current tributes, and since Twelve has only had one Victor, he must mentor all of Twelve's tributes every year), and the chaperone assigned by the Capitol. Katniss also soon meets her stylist and prep team, who are in charge of her 'look.' All of these characters are exceptionally well-drawn, and by the start of the Games itself, the reader really feels like she knows these people. This is, by far, what I thought Collins did best in writing this book.

Here is what I know about the main characters:

Katniss Everdeen:
Katniss has been in pure survival mode for many years. She had a wonderful father who taught her to hunt and forage in the wilderness outside of the district fence (Twelve is thought to be such a weak district that the rules are not really enforced very strictly), but he was killed in a mine explosion. Katniss' mother had a mental breakdown when her husband died, and Katniss had to provide for herself and her younger sister, Prim. She almost did not manage to keep them alive. She has never forgiven her mother for 'abandoning' them, and as a result, has two core beliefs. 1) She will do anything to protect her sister; 2) The only person she can rely on is herself. Katniss doesn't think about anything more complex than that. It's just "survive," one minute at a time.
Her only moments of happiness happen when hunting with her friend Gale Hawthorne, a boy who also lost his father (but, in contrast with Katniss, not his mother) and provides for his siblings. They understand each other instinctively after all of this time spent hunting together. Gale is more reflective than Katniss, however, and has strong opinions about the Capitol and the Games. He seems like a budding revolutionary.
Katniss' mother, now that she is 'back,' is a healer. Katniss gathers the herbs, or trades her pelts/meat for the ingredients, and her mother treats the sick and injured of the district. Prim has a knack for healing, as well.
More of Katniss' qualities are revealed during the lead-up to the Games. She has a fiery temper, and tends to lash out instinctively. She also has a certain captivating quality about her that her stylist Cinna highlights by dressing her in "fire." On the other hand, she also gives off an impression of purity and innocence.
She also has impressive survival skills and is deadly accurate with a bow and arrow. She is, by far, the most interesting tribute Twelve has sent in a long time, and her mentor is changed by the realization that she may actually have a fighting chance.

Peeta Mellark
Peeta is the male tribute from Twelve. He is from the merchant class (his father is a baker), rather than the mine-worker class. Peeta is going into the Games sure that he will not survive, but determined to die on his own terms. He is not willing to play the Games the Capitol's way, brutally killing his competitors, but is trying to figure out how to survive while maintaining his sense of right and wrong. He is sensitive and intelligent, with a gift for public speaking. He and Katniss have a bit of history, as he took a beating from his mother in order to sneak Katniss some bread when she was at her most desperate. He has always admired her (for her inner strength, or something), but Katniss, of course, hasn't given him much thought (again, she can only think about surviving).
During the pre-Games interviews, Peeta reveals that he has been in love with her for a long time. This, along with the way her stylist has highlighted "that certain captivating something about Katniss," ensures that the pair from Twelve are the main focus of the Games audience. Katniss doesn't know if she trusts Peeta and thinks that he is faking it to 'play' the audience. She keeps him at a distance because she knows that one of them will have to kill the other during the Games.
Peeta has decided that his way to defy the Games is to put Katniss' survival above his own. His only goal in the arena is to keep Katniss alive. Like Gale, Peeta wants to see the Capitol overthrown and the Games abolished, but believes that that is best done by changing popular opinion (whereas Gale's approach is warfare). If the audience loves these two tributes, and doesn't want to see them die, they may rebel against the Games themselves.
Incidentally, I think this often gets overlooked by people, but Peeta is portrayed as physically strong in this book. He scores well in training, the Careers are willing to have him join them (although they mainly want him to get at Katniss), and early on he is able to fight off other tributes when he needs to in order to protect Katniss. I felt that his character shows that a person can be strong and able to physically overpower an opponent, but they can still have humanistic ideals for how people and society should behave.

Haymitch Abernathy
Haymitch is the sole Victor from Twelve, and is therefore Katniss's and Peeta's mentor during the Games. It is his job to help each come up with a strategy, as well as send them help (food, medicine, etc) if the viewing audience sends money (people can 'sponsor' tributes they are rooting for). Haymitch is a great character, showing how the Games breaks even the Victors. Even though he survived physically, he did not survive functionally. He spends every day in a drunken stupor, unable to reconcile what he had to do when he was in the arena, as well as the toll mentoring dozens of doomed children has taken on him over the years.
Haymitch is an extremely smart mentor, but very difficult to get along with. He sees that Peeta is genuine and will win the audience's affections just by being honest. He also sees Katniss's nature, and they have a sort of instinctive way of communicating with one another.

REVIEW: THE MAIN ARC OF THE STORY:
Katniss is confused by how to play the pre-Games pomp and ceremony, but nevertheless her "certain something" captures the fancy of both the audience and the gamemakers*. Once inside the arena, however, her well-honed survival instincts take over. Again, we see how un-self-aware she is, but despite the fact that the POV is inside Katniss' head, we get some glimpses of her character through the behavior of other characters. We see that she has feelings, skills, values, and a certain specialness to her, even though she doesn't see these things in herself.

(*There are booby traps in the arena that are controlled by the gamemakers - they use them, as well as supplies and weapons they may or may not make available, to manipulate the game the tributes can play. They can flush them out of hiding with wild animals, fire, rain, etc. They can use those same things to make them move toward more aggressive players, or they can use them to just kill the tributes themselves if the Games get "too boring" for the audience.)

Katniss' game play only continues to captivate the audience, as she shows cunning and skill. More importantly, she shows mercy and tenderness- particularly toward Rue, the young girl she befriends. These displays of humanity must not be seen often in the Games, because Katniss knows they will provoke the ire of the gamemakers and are therefore risky. However, she is willing to risk it, showing how fiercely she holds onto her humanistic ideals. Of course, this is instinct: she doesn't realize any of it because her psyche is too busy surviving to spare the time for self-examination (unlike Peeta, who is far more self-aware).

And the Games play on, gory and violent, deeply disturbing in the graphic portrayal of teen-on-teen brutality. Because the arena is an engineered place, Collins ups the goriness of the deaths far beyond what they would be if this were a depiction of kids fighting in the woods (which would be hard enough to read; this is far worse).

WHAT'S THE BOOK TRYING TO SAY? (or, What should the point of the trilogy be? / What does the point of the trilogy seem like it's going to be?)

To remind you, my overall impression was that I'm very uneasy about this level of violence in a YA book (I would feel this way regardless of the YA classification, to be honest), but that this could be all worth it IF the other books take this story to the right conclusion. And what would that conclusion be?

The thing I kept thinking as I was reading was, "why wouldn't these children just decide, as a group, to refuse to fight?" Simple, right? Nobody kills each other, nobody has to die, Hunger Games over. Collins handles this issue in a few ways. For one, there are the Career tributes. Their districts view the games as an honor and, since they usually produce the Victors, are willing to train their whole lives and then volunteer. Their entire belief system is based on proving themselves as the best player in the arena, and they would never agree to some kind of 'truce.' In fact, they would quickly 'take care of' any tribute that even approached them to discuss it. For another, the tributes know that the arena itself (through the gamemakers) will kill them anyway. And finally, this is the 74th Hunger Games. This has been part of the culture for generations, and they have been indoctrinated into its value system.

Okay, so I was able to 'go with it' that the children wouldn't just refuse to kill one another. But that has to be where this is all heading, right? These teenagers, with their carefully constructed characters and philosophies about the world (and Katniss's innate 'special something' the audience senses in her, even though she's not aware of it; and Peeta's innate ability to verbalize these ideas without the audience really knowing what they're hearing), must be destined to change this dystopian society. There's no other way for this to turn out, right? I mean, everything was so carefully laid out in this book. And if that's the point of the trilogy, that young people's ideals can catch on and change the hearts and minds of an indoctrinated populace, then this series could be truly great... a wonderful thing for teens to read, despite the violence that I found brutally excessive.

With this overall impression, I couldn't wait to read the sequels and find out how Collins planned to take the story to that eventual ending. As I said, I felt like I really knew these characters and understood them, and when I stumbled across an article in Entertainment Weekly about the casting of the forthcoming movie, I realized just how much I cared about these characters. I think the casting has been inspired and definitely in agreement with the way I saw the characters. I was getting excited about the movie as well as Books Two and Three! The Hunger Games was frequently on my mind. As soon as school was over, I dove into Catching Fire (Book Two); that review is coming. (It won't be as long as this one... not even close.)

THE REST CONTAINS SPOILERS....

What I liked:
I liked the contrast between Peeta's way of changing the world (ideas), and Gale's (rebellion). I liked the way Katniss couldn't help but be drawn to Peeta and his innate goodness, although she fought against it because she thought it was just a Games strategy on his part, and then she gave in but is such an un-self-aware person who has never allowed herself to feel anything that she was completely confused by her own feelings for him. She didn't know that what she was feeling was love, but we knew. I thought that was setting up a nice arc for Katniss throughout the trilogy - she will grow to become more in touch with her thoughts and feelings, and become capable of operating as a more complete human being. Eventually, this journey would allow her to realize that she loves Peeta with her whole body, soul, and mind, while she loves Gale as an essential piece of herself, the way you love a best friend you grew up with because you shaped each other; you ARE each other. I was looking forward to going through that realization process with Katniss.

(Actually, I found Katniss' confusion pretty frustrating. You love him, you idiot! I didn't really like the love triangle being set up and wasn't looking forward to Katniss playing with the emotions of both boys while she became self-aware. As I said, though, I was looking forward to her getting there and was willing to put up with it for the eventual payoff.)

I also liked how the ultimate defiant act that ended the Games was not clear in Katniss' mind - was she doing this because of her love for Peeta, or as a way to defy the Capitol and ultimately refuse to play their game? Of course, we see that it serves both functions. Katniss can take both journeys during the rest of the trilogy.
I liked the set-up of Katniss as orchestrator of a new Panem, the cause symbolized by the mockingjay pin. Clearly, all this time spent describing her 'certain something' so clear to the citizens, Peeta, and Haymitch as well as her ability to demonstrate humanistic values on pure instinct (her fiery temper, her mercy, her placing the survival of Prim, Rue, and Peeta over her own...) are setting her up to realize her role in changing the mindset of the populace and changing the rule. With Peeta as the voice of the ideals, and Katniss as the untamed emotions growing into being the voice of action, this was looking to be a fanstastic story of a good society rising up out of the ashes... led by teenagers, so often the voice of idealism in society - even better.

*** IF *** that's where this trilogy is going. If not, it's just an excuse to sell books using shocking violence.

DO I RECOMMEND IT?
Only if the trilogy turns out to be satisfying in the ways I mentioned, because this book ends in a way that leaves us hanging. So much so, that it would be frustrating to read ONLY this book, and even MORE frustrating to read all three if the trilogy as a whole doesn't live up to what has been so effectively set up and foreshadowed.
Sorry to leave it hanging like this, but that verdict will have to wait...

Movie reviews: Gnomeo & Juliet and Harry Potter & the Deathly Hallows Part One

2011-06-27T13:33:00.000-07:00

I continue my summer of reviews (still working on my reviews of the Hunger Games trilogy) as explained here.

This weekend we rented a couple of movies. I watched Gnomeo & Juliet with the kids, and then after they went to bed The Hubby and I watched Harry Potter & the Deathly Hallows Part One (actually, he slept).

Review:
Gnomeo & Juliet
I liked this movie! I tend to like animated movies, although I pretty much only watch ones that get good reviews.

It's pretty obvious from the title that this is a re-telling of Shakespeare's Romeo & Juliet, set in a duplex and involving garden decorations. And Elton John songs, for some reason, but it's so joyful that we can't help but go with it. In one yard are the "blue" gnomes (they have blue hats), and next door are the "red" gnomes (yep, red hats). There is a rivalry involving lawnmower racing, setting up an escalating series of actions intended to "seek revenge" on the other side's yard.

Gnomeo, a lawnmower racer, is the "blue (queen)'s" son (she's not a queen, but she is the leader for some reason). Juliet is the "red (king)'s" daughter, and is supposed to stand atop a castle-shaped fountain, holding a rose and looking lovely. Her father is overprotective because he misses her mother, and he frequently insists that she remember that she's delicate. Because this movie was made this year, Juliet is of course a modern girl - tough and adventurous - and refuses to behave as though she is delicate.

What I loved most about this movie was the clever dialogue. It paid homage to Romeo & Juliet without clinging too tightly to the original. I enjoyed the references to certain scenes (as well as the many Shakespeare references, both background and foreground), and was also glad that the movie had the freedom to tell its own story. It uses a new voice and tone, and I found it thoroughly enjoyable.

In particular, I loved the scene when Gnomeo and Juliet met, as well as their "balcony" scene and the time they spent getting acquainted in the abandoned garden. What a "meet-cute" scene it was! They were both disguised, ninja-like, and she was trying to get an orchid from the abandoned greenhouse because she thought it would prove to her father that she is tough and able to take care of herself. It was an action sequence, with back-and-forth both physically and verbally. Nothing terribly original, since we frequently see this kind of "they-are-equals" set-up in modern movies, but still a fun ride. In this scene, I found the Elton John song distracting, though. I was thinking, "who is singing this?" and I didn't feel that the song's vibe matched the scene's pacing very well.

Their "date" in the abandoned garden was a pleasure as well, as they discover a shared interest in lawnmowers (stand-ins for muscle cars) and hot-rodding with them. Juliet is happily surprised to discover that Gnomeo neither tells her to be careful, nor is he threatened by her ability to drive the mower. A real man's masculinity wouldn't be threatened by a capable woman, after all - this is certainly a theme in the modern fairy tale romance! Anyway, the whole thing is as cute as we could hope, and then a lovable character is introduced to boot! My kids fell head-over-heels for the silly pink plastic flamingo. I felt my cheek muscles fatiguing as well.

Finally, I liked the way the movie handled the re-written ending. Of course, they had to change the ending - it's an animated comedy, after all (Elton John, remember?), not a tragedy. But they worked in a wink-wink about the change that I thought was very clever. Gnomeo has a conversation about it with a Shakespeare statue in the park. Shakespeare tells Gnomeo how it's going to end, and it's perfectly in Gnomeo's character to respond with "oh yeah? We'll see about that!" (It's written much better than that, actually.)

I loved the palette of the movie (bright!), the overall tone (joyful!), the updated characters, and yes, the music (with one exception, as I noted earlier). I don't want to wrap up without mentioning the animation of the facial expressions and movements, as well as the voice acting.

A winner! I think we'll end up owning this one!

_____________________________

Review: Harry Potter & the Deathly Hallows, Part One

Wow, was this movie BORING.

I can't say I'm surprised, since the 7th book in the Harry Potter series (I'm a fan) contains a LONG portion where a LOT Of nothing happens. When I heard that they were turning book 7 into two movies, I wondered how they would do that, because what would happen in the first movie? That's why this is the only Harry Potter movie I didn't rush out to see in the theater. It turns out, my fears were well-founded.

They definitely had a tough task due to the way the story develops in the book. Dumbledore is gone, and Harry is left with a hero's quest but no idea how to even begin to accomplish it. What's more, the Death Eaters are hunting him down, so not only is Harry not safe, but everyone in his vicinity is vulnerable as well. He, Hermione, and Ron go into hiding (Hermione's uncommon skill with magic makes that possible), and sort of sit around for months waiting for some inspiration. A tough thing to film, I'll admit.

However, that's not the biggest problem I had with the film. No, that would be the pacing of the whole movie. This, I would say, was a failure.

The first part moves along rather well, and you would expect that the pacing would slow down for the heroes-in-hiding portion, and then ramp back up for some action sequences in the third act. There were action sequences, but the problem was that they felt slow, too! Slow, quiet, with stony-faced characters. A fight with Nagini, a visit with the strange Mr. Lovegood, a battle with Bellatrix Lestrange; these scenes were all very slow. It made for a movie that I don't plan to watch ever again - I'll just skip this one when I re-watch the series of films. And that doesn't even bother me in the slightest.

The first book review of the summer... Stuart Little

2011-06-25T12:00:00.000-07:00

The reading project I dove into upon finishing the school year was actually the Hunger Games trilogy. I have MUCH to say about that; that post will have to wait. Actually, I think that is going to take me more than one post.

I'll start myself off with something easier: Stuart Little. This was my daughters' most recent bedtime story. And while I'm at it, can I just say how much I love carrying on this tradition? My dad read me a chapter each night when I was a kid (the Bobbsey Twins books were our favorites), and I love that I'm giving my girls this memory.

This was my first reading of the classic story by E.B. White.

One night, a few chapters in, the beauty of the writing itself really struck me. The flow of the language is just remarkable. The way he chose words and fit them together - I was stunned. It's subtle, and it's truly art.

To say this story is fantastical and imaginative is an understatement. The author presents the absurd in such a frank way, and that's precisely what had us giggling. Stuart is the second child of a man and woman, and he is a mouse. He is a human, but he is a mouse. The first half of the book details various disjointed stories about Stuart figuring out a way to turn on a faucet, or getting trapped in a window shade, or sailing a toy boat on a lake in the park. The second half of the book is centered around his quest to find the bird that had stayed with his family in the winter (it seems that he loves her). The author treats this as a series of little vignettes as well, rather than a narrative, so it is rather jarring when the book simply ends with no resolution to his journey.

I haven't seen the Stuart Little movie, but I can't imagine how this book would translate to the screen; they must have written a completely different storyline.

My favorite part of the book was when Stuart taught school for a day. This was a great example of the wit, whimsy and style of the book as a whole. "Charming" is the word that springs primarily to mind. The girls and I discussed how inspired we were that the author gave his imagination free reign. They both said they like to write stories, and hope to still have that much imagination when they are adults.

All in all, I found this book endearing, although I was suprised that it was a collection of scenes rather than a story. We read Trumpet of the Swan as a bedtime story, and we have read Charlotte's Web on our own, and those books both have beginnings and endings. All three of us were inspired by the author's skill and imagination, so much so that the girls actually vocalized a desire to be able to write like that.

A role model of a book!

A new focus (if it lasts)

2011-06-24T16:57:00.000-07:00

Well, another school year has come and gone, and it is summer break again!

This school year was a big one for me, because not only did my baby go to Kindergarten, but I also became a "working mom."

I went back to work as a middle school science teacher after ten years of being home with my children! What a change it was. I figured it would be interesting to write about my adventures back in the classroom, this time with a family at home, so I thought it would revitalize my blogging efforts.

Obviously, it was not to be.

I was swamped. Many times, in fact, I felt like I was drowning. This year was HARD WORK. I did not get much sleep (!!) and was never even close to logging into blogger.

Enough about that. It's summer now, I made it through the school year, and now I have a year's worth of lesson plans at the ready. Next year I will take on a few more responsibilities at work, but I'm feeling good about it. Last summer I was putting a lot of pressure on myself to start getting lessons ready, but this summer I am giving myself a break!

I am hoping to be able to make this the SUMMER OF READING!

I love to read, but it has been many years since I was able to carve out a spot for books in my life. I want to reintroduce myself to reading this summer!

Not only that, I'd love to reacquaint myself with this here blog.

I am going to give the blog a new focus and write reviews of the books I read this summer. We'll see if I manage it, but it's a good goal. I might write reviews of movies, TV shows, etc. as well.

Sounds like a plan, Stan!

The Second Week of Summer.

2010-06-25T15:00:00.000-07:00

Now, that's what we're talkin' about!

You can't beat staying at the Disneyland Hotel, but apart from that, the Second Week of Summer kicked the First Week of Summer's butt!

Middle Girl and The Boy did soccer camp every morning this week, and loved it! The coaches were all 19- and 20-year-olds from Britain, and they played games, did drills, staged a mock World Cup all week (the kids wore the colors of their team, researched the countries, made flags...), and generally put together a great experience for the kids. They wrote a personal note to each kid about their strengths during the week, which really impressed me. I especially love seeing The Boy when he comes out of his shell, which happened very quickly. They are looking forward to doing it again next year!

Big Girl and I had some time alone together. Times like this are really good for our relationship. We did a little grocery shopping (she wanted to buy every single sweet she saw), visited the library, bought some new music from iTunes, played with the new DSLR camera, and just generally enjoyed each other's company.

In the afternoons we had playdates with friends nearly every day. Three of those were at our house, spending hours in the pool! The kids are already sporting tans despite the SPF 85 we are lathering all over ourselves multiple times a day. (Me, I sit in the shade. I am a shade-loving plant.)

One night we went to a concert in the park. It was the local historic marionette troupe, and we try to catch their show about every other year. I reconnected with a college friend there, who has a busy three-year-old daughter and she was always running off. I remember those days, when you were lucky to string four words together! His second baby is due in August, so things are about to get chaotic-crazy-wonderful!

After the concert, we stopped by the brand-new frozen yogurt place. It's one of those serve yourself places, where you can add any amount of crazy toppings because you pay by weight. That's right, this summer has brought FroYo within walking distance of our house. Dangerous.

Second Week of Summer FTW!

The start of summer

2010-06-22T15:14:00.000-07:00

Very uneven start to our summer.

Picked up the kids from their last day of school (early dismissal), then headed straight to an orthodontist appointment. I thought it was one last consultation, so I thought it would be quick and we would be on with our day, which included a sleepover with Big Girl's best friend.

But I was wrong.

The brackets were glued onto Big Girl's teeth, to her horror.

She was completely taken by surprise, and her reaction? DEPRESSION. Many tears. She still wanted the sleepover, since she was feeling so sad and wanted her friend to comfort her. I felt bad for her friend, who really rose to the occasion but didn't have much fun. I hope we can make it up to her.

In Big Girl's mind, she was now hideous and a freak. She was terrified by the though of anyone seeing her. She went to dance class the next morning and refused to open her mouth. At her rehearsal that afternoon, I bribed her to smile. I told her we could make a $5 bet about whether the teacher would say anything about the braces. Big Girl chose the side that the teacher wouldn't even notice. So the bet was: if she smiled during the whole rehearsal, and the teacher didn't say anything, I had to pay her $5. If the teacher did say something, no one would pay anyone.

Good deal for the kiddo, huh? In the end, I had to pay her the $5!

Then we went to a Summer Kickoff party and all of her school friends saw her new metallic smile. She was worried they wouldn't like her anymore. Of course it was fine and none of her friends teased her at all.

Definite highs and lows. They continued.

After the fun party, we went to Disneyland to stay overnight there. It was Big Girl's birthday wish, and it was fun for everyone! I REALLY enjoyed getting to stay there.

During the rest of the first week off from school, there were some errands and playdates, and Big Girl had to have four teeth extracted.

That was a doozy.

The ortho and dentist planned for the dentist to do it. When I made the appointment, they asked if she would need nitrous. "At the very least," I said. "Yes," she said, "I see a note here that she has a lot of apprehension over procedures. Okay, see you Wednesday."

The Hubby and I wondered how the dentist was possibly going to remove four teeth from her head while she was conscious.

We took her in. She refused to sit in the chair. She cried, gnashed her teeth, and wailed.

The dentist didn't even come in. He sent for us to come back out to the front. He told us to go to an oral surgeon, because this kid would need a general anesthetic.

I was able to get an appt with the surgeon for that same afternoon.

No food for the girl.

Success at the surgeon. (Gasp) at the price tag.

Interestingly, she recovered quickly. She was back to normal the next day. Time for our summer to get better! Off to the library we went.

COMING SOON:
Well, barbra, that was a strange way to celebrate the start of summer. How are you marking the second week?

Unlikely Admiration

2010-05-25T10:04:00.000-07:00

An interesting question at The Women's Colony today... Who Would I Be Most Surprised to Know You Admire?

I am a snob about music. Not in the way most people think of musical snobbery, because I like a wide range of musical styles: rock, alternative (esp. punk) and musical theater are my favorite genres (see what I mean?). Obviously I'm not a snob in the high-brow sense!

What I am a snob about is singing ability. Even as far back as 4th or 5th grade, I would not stand for a successful musical artist with a so-so singing voice. Even if their act was primarily style or shock, I was obnoxiously loud in the "SHE SUCKS!!" department. I just felt (and still do) that there are so many talented singers out there who ALSO have the big personality. Why are there so many who don't ever get their "big break" while these other hacks are packaged into superstars?

Everyone who has known me for any length of time has heard far too many of my tirades about the music industry's machine. "Pop music is a joke!" "It's all a farce!" "They are treating American consumers like fools!" The first artist that inspired my tirades was Madonna. "Does no one else hear that SHE CANNOT SING?" And it continued... through Britney... even now with that Kesha person...

Since I regard Madonna's famous antics with eye rolls (at best), most people would be pretty shocked to hear that...

...I think Lady Gaga is pretty great.

Sure, she strikes me as "hey, look at me! look at me!" just like Madonna always did, but THAT GIRL CAN SING.

So I find myself cheering her on as she has become a worldwide superstar so quickly.

Sing It, Weird Girl!

People who knew-me-when would also be surprised that I, of the I'll-never-watch-American-Idol-it's-the-pop-music-machine-on-display-and-it-makes-me-sick, am completely impressed with the kids on American Idol.

That show is rough. You have to be really good to make it through that process. The Internet is brutal, and the judges' comments on the show itself are pretty harsh. I wish the judges would make those kinds of comments about the guest artists who perform on the show! That would really demonstrate how hard they are on the contestants!

Some of them are SO talented, and I am rooting for them now that they're off the show and out there giving it a shot!

Kelly Clarkson, Jennifer Hudson, Carrie Underwood, David Cook, Adam Lambert... they all have AMAZING voices! LOVE!

P.S. GO CRYSTAL!

BOSSY's back home

2010-05-17T13:49:00.000-07:00

She swoops in, like some sort of fairy godmother, waves her magic pixie dust over the people she has gathered, and friendships are created.

She's BOSSY, ladies and gentlemen.

She's back home now, her 42-day (No)Book Tour has come to an end, and I can imagine how happy her beautiful family and enormous dog are to see her again. I just feel lucky I got to spend a few hours with her during this, another one of her big adventures!

The first time she ventured out on an Excellent Road Trip, I had no idea what to expect. I had a few butterflies walking into that restaurant. But do you know what happened? I met some terrific people, and after keeping up with them through their blogs for two years, I was really looking forward to seeing them again! This time it was more like a reunion, and we were so busy catching up, and feeling so comfortable, that we all neglected to take pictures!

That BOSSY, not only do we never see each other without her coming into town, but she manages to get the only photos!

There's Heidi and Suebob and Smacksy and Tootsie and (me) and Kelly and Jason and BOSSY and JCK and Aunt Snow and Shayera! Hi guys!

Here's BOSSY's post about our meet-up.

It was a really nice evening. I just wish I could spend even more time with all of these bloggy friends, including BOSSY herself! But she had to move on to the Bay Area. I guess I can share her.

Too bad she couldn't stick around the following day, because Heidi and I decided to spend it together. I think BOSSY kinda wished she had time to join in! (Next time, BOSSY!) I love spending time with Heidi, she is just the loveliest person! We walked around my little town a bit, and stepped into a craft shop full of the strangest trinkets. They are for artist who incorporate a collage style, I'm guessing. Buttons and TV tubes and bottle caps and matchbooks, you name it! After our short stroll, I tried to take her to the yummiest lunch spot in town, but it was really busy. We did alright with another little cafe, though. Then I picked up my son from preschool and we went over to the fancy shmancy museum. My son was very interested in finding Picassos. He was a well-behaved 5-year-old boy in the museum (what a relief), and he talked about Heidi all the rest of the day!

All in all, I sure am lucky to have met some special people through this blogging thing. And I'm only a sometime-blogger!

Hopefully there will be ice

2010-04-28T22:42:00.001-07:00

Tomorrow is the bridal shower for the first grade teacher! As Room Parent, I have been very busy coordinating all of the parents who will be making the party happen. It's been email city around here! In fact, I just now responded to a text on my cell phone - and have no idea who it was from. But I asked them to bring ice...

At the same time, this week has involved several phone conversations about the possible teaching job for next year. I think that we pretty much have everything hammered out now; just one or two more phone calls should do it. I am still feeling conflicted about it, but moving forward I will focus on the positive. That's pretty much my way in the world: acknowledge the feelings but focus on the positive.

Hopefully tomorrow I will feel like I have a moment to breathe. After I allow myself that breath, I'd love to tell you about last weekend! I had a great weekend and got to spend some time with really special people. It's quite likely that one of them was YOU!

Decisions decisions

2010-04-19T14:24:00.000-07:00

I recently finished a three-month teaching assignment.

It had been over nine years since I last taught 7th grade science, and I wasn't sure if I still had the skills. The fact that it was my old teaching assignment, in my old classroom and office, led me to predict that it would feel pretty weird being back after all this time. After all, I'm so different now! I left when my first baby was born (literally- I worked the very day I ended up going into labor; she was born at 4 am the day of graduation). So, I was once the young, childless teacher often mistaken for one of the students, devoting every minute of every day to my teaching. Now I'm a mom of three who has spent quite a bit of time working with really young children and thinking about parenting. Aside from my short stint as an aquarium educator, I hadn't done much science in the intervening years. And let's face facts, I would not be able to devote even a fraction of the time I used to give to my teaching, with all of my kids' activities and mommy-time. I wondered if I'd be any good at it anymore!

When my old school called, in need of a long-term sub for the current 7th-grade science teacher who was going on maternity leave, it seemed like the perfect opportunity for me to find out. It was only for three months, and the teacher would leave me the plans (more on that later). I was familiar with the type of students at the school, and the teachers who knew me were very excited to hear I would be back. Those things really helped. On the other hand, some procedures and many technologies were different, and the daily schedule was COMPLETELY different, so it would be a curious mix of familiar and new.

No small issue was preparing my family for this big change. Three months feels long at the start. The girls were both in school from 8-3, so it didn't impact them much. They needed to be ready earlier in the morning and we had to develop a back-up plan in case I didn't make it by the end of pick-up time. Of course, they needed to help out more around the house. But my boy had the most to deal with. He had to go from being at preschool MWF 9-11:30 to being there MTWThF 9-3:30 or 7:45-11:45 (alternating days). My school was on a rotating schedule, so it was not the same every week, which was confusing for both my boy and the preschool.

It turned out that this was the hardest aspect of the whole experience. My precious boy did NOT like being dropped off in a different room, with different teachers, and he did NOT like being at school on Tuesday and Thursday without his friends, and he did NOT like having to stay four hours later than his old pick-up time. There were many tears shed, and his teachers told me he wasn't playing, but standing off to the side missing his mommy. I always put on a brave face for him, trying to exude a feeling of confidence that it would be a good day at school. But as soon as I was back in the car, driving to work, I often burst into tears myself.

But how was it once I was at work?

In short, it was good. It didn't take me long to find out that I "still got it." The students were funny and smart (by and large), and we connected quickly. It was great getting to know my new colleagues, and I found that not only did I remember the subject matter, it was a good excuse to learn more about the topics.

Earning a paycheck felt pretty darn good, too!

But teaching is VERY hard work, VERY time consuming. Doing this job and also taking care of a family is EXTREMELY difficult. I found that I simply could not work on planning and grading until the children were in bed, which is also when I would sit down and realize just how exhausted I was feeling. It felt like I would never catch a minute to breathe. I hadn't expected to need to do so much planning, but the teacher left me with very little. I designed a lot of work sheets, lab instructions, and assessments. I had 56 middle school students from whom I was collecting homework and class work. I was underwater, struggling to surface.

I am good at this job. I have a talent for breaking down concepts and tasks into smaller, more understandable chunks, then guiding the students in putting them together to understand the bigger ideas. I am good at, and enjoy, making handouts that explain, reinforce, and practice the material. But I am NOT good at setting boundaries for myself. I am NOT good at protecting myself from burnout. I could always see the light at the end of the tunnel, because this long-term sub assignment was for only three months. Now that it's over, I am positively reveling in being back to my normal schedule. Aaaaaaaahhh. My boy is much happier having days off from preschool and a shorter school day. We have been gallivanting off to fun adventures and let me tell you, THIS FEELS RIGHT.

It was good, but I'm glad it's over. Yes.

Now, the school wants me to come be the 7th grade science teacher for the next school year. My boy will be in Kindergarten, so he'll be at school every day anyway, but only for half the day. The school wants to work my schedule so I only have to be there for half the day, trying to align it with my son's schedule. Quite a decision... On the one hand, it's nice to have a life where colleagues value your contributions and you are getting paid for your work. On the other, it would be a whole year of working myself too hard and not having any time for myself and HUGE HASSLES when one of the kids gets sick and can't go to school (THE HUGENESS OF THIS ISSUE CANNOT BE OVERSTATED).

Oh yeah, and there's this little aspect: financially, our family has gotten to the point where we need me to bring in an income. When you look at it in this light, this job seems like the right situation; my top priorities for a job are having summers off and not working past 3:00 pm.

I've got some thinking to do, although it does seem like a very good arrangement for me. The feeling in the pit of my stomach is sadness that I wouldn't have as much freedom to help out at the kids' school as I have been wanting. With the girls, I had younger children to take care of, making it hard to be at the school. I always thought, "when The Boy is in school, then I won't have anything keeping me from being there!" Letting go of that makes me grieve a little, to be honest.

Overthink things? Why yes, I resemble that remark!

a meme to get me warmed up again

2010-04-02T18:14:00.000-07:00

Wow. It's been so long since I've been to blogger that it no longer automatically pops up in my explorer window when I start typing it. sheesh.

When I started my back-to-work-temporarily experience, I thought it would get me blogging again. I thought it would be so interesting to chronicle my experience being back in the classroom "full-time" after over nine years of being a SAHM.

And it would have been.

But I found myself absolutely SWAMPED and sleep-deprived by the experience, and blogging just didn't happen.

I had my last day of work on Thursday, March 25. I was immediately swept into a big brouhaha among the other first-grade parents over a bridal shower we are planning for the first-grade teacher. I am the Room Parent, so am responsible for all of the communication and most of the planning. Thought you would have a minute to blog after all this time? THINK AGAIN, SISTER.

I feel like I have so much to say, and it's daunting. Sometimes getting started is the hardest part.

Then I saw this meme at blackbird's, small town mom's, and Hotfessional's (a few of my favorite people!), and thought this just might do the trick. A meme just might be the perfect trigger to getting on blogger again!

So here's to the future!

1. Do you like bleu cheese? Yes. Especially because it makes me think of The Hubby and his cooking. He loves to add bleu cheese to things.
2. Have you ever smoked? No. Not even one little puff. Is it called a puff?
3. Do you own a gun? Absolutely not.
4. Favorite type of food? Dessert. or Thai food.
5. Favorite type of music? Favorite, punk-ish rock. No, musical theater. Girl-singer-songwriter. Lately I've been listening to country, but that's only because I fell in love with the sound of Josh Turner's voice when I heard it on NPR.
6. What do you think of hot dogs? I think they taste best when you're at a baseball game.
7. Favorite Christmas movie? I'm a sucker for It's a Wonderful Life.
8. What do you prefer to drink in the morning? Mimosas! Whee! but I can't remember the last one I had.
9. Can you do push-ups? Only a few "girl" ones. :-(
10. What’s your favorite piece of jewelry? My wedding ring. My current jewelry obsession, though? A bracelet with a forget-me-not in it and a pair of dangly claddagh earrings. Santa gave me both last Christmas.
11. Favorite hobby? MUSIC!
12. Do you have A. D. D.? No.
13. Do you wear glasses/contacts? Yes.
14. Middle name? It's unusual. My mom has the same middle name, and I passed it on to my Big Girl.
15. Name three thoughts at this exact moment: "What's that beeping?" "How many kids are playing in my house right now?" "How many hours of Wii has The Boy played today?"
16. Name three drinks you regularly drink: Water. Red Gatorade. Tequila.
17. Current worry? Will I finish writing this?
18. Current hate right now? The politics of hate.
19. Favorite place to be? On stage.
20. How did you bring in the new year? We went to bed early because we had to be up before the sun to get a spot to watch a certain famous parade.
21. Someplace you’d like to go? Costa Rica.
22. Name three people who will complete this. blackbird, small town mom, hotfessional.
23. Do you own slippers? yes. what a weird question.
24. What color shirt are you wearing? what color is this? dark blue-green? teal?
25. Do you like sleeping on satin sheets? too slippery. high-count cotton, thank you.
26. Can you whistle? yes, weakly.
27. Where are you now? in the den.
28. Would you be a pirate? That really doesn't sound like "me" at all.
29. What songs do you sing in the shower? I love to sing in the shower. I sing everything! Rock, pop, country, opera...
30. Favorite Girl’s Name? I don't have a favorite anymore.
31. Favorite boy’s name? Ditto.
32. What is in your pocket right now? Nothing, as usual.
33. Last thing that made you laugh? 2 seconds ago, Big Girl whined that "the other kids don't want to play with me! I think it's because sometimes I get bossy." Then I laughed. (it's funny because it's true)
34. What vehicle do you drive? Honda Odyssey. boring.
35. Worst injury you’ve ever had? Thankfully few injuries. My worst was from childbirth. enough said.
36. Do you love where you live? YES!!!!!!!!!
37. How many TVs do you have in your house? Three.
38. How many computers do you have in your house? One.
39. If you changed your job, what would it be? Famous Marine Biologist
40. If you were granted three wishes, what would they be? I would wish for grand things. World peace, freedom from worrying about paying for health care, and that everyone would care about protecting the environment. Stuff like that.

Kid-Powered Decor

2009-12-18T03:33:00.000-08:00

I'm glad to be participating in Jen's Holiday Homes Tour again this year!

My home looks pretty much exactly the same as last year, with a few small adjustments. To really get a feel for my home's holiday decor, click on the link and take a look!

So this year, instead of showing my whole house again, I am going to take you on a "Kid-Powered Decor" tour.

Each year, my kids (ages 9, almost 7, and just-turned-5) do more and more of the decorating themselves.

Let's start here: these are the decorations that have been their domain for several years. I got the Little People Nativity and the little tree when I had toddlers in the house, so that they could play with Christmas decorations while staying away from my breakable ornaments and nativity scene. The kids still look forward to putting these out each year.

Next, the kids put up their school arts and crafts from years past. This display grows each year!

Then they found the window clings and arranged those in the front windows. Mommy was busy with who-knows-what and meanwhile, Christmas decorating was taking place!

Out of the box came a whole bunch of Christmas-themed stuffed animals. They were arranged in groups on the living room speakers.

New this year are these penguin towels for the kids' bathroom. There are some penguin fans in our family!

This one is not due to my kids... but it's still kid-powered! The kids next door collected mistletoe when they were up north at Thanksgiving, and packaged it up to sell! Isn't it adorable?!

Last but definitely not least, ta da! This year's Christmas tree! I'm really happy with it. It's much better than the dud we got last year! Nice shape, nice size, very fresh. It looks lovely!

The kids did most of the tree trimming themselves! They still tend to put ornaments in clumps, so I follow them around to rearrange things just a tad.

This is probably their favorite family tradition. It's so much fun to see them pulling ornaments out of the box and saying, "Oh! I love this one!"

I do that, too!

I have had this one for a long time. It's my beloved alma mater! The hubby got it for me not long after we graduated.

This one commemorates the opening of the big aquarium in our area. I bought the ornament for myself when I took my students there for a field trip. Just a few short years later, I was an employee at the aquarium! That made the ornament even more special!

This one was made by a friend of ours who is a professional artist. Isn't he talented?

Big girl and I picked this one out when she was four. What a fun age: possibly the first time they actually remember Christmas from the year before. Selecting this one was a special moment for both of us. She makes sure this is one of the first ones she puts on the tree each year.

Right out front!

2009-12-15T23:42:00.000-08:00

I love this car. I have seen it around our town for a couple of years now, and it gives me such a chuckle!

The minivan with the flames! This car's owner must have some sense of humor. I love the irony, but wouldn't have the guts to drive this car.

And now! Now! It's been parking on my street! In fact, I took this picture from my front yard - it was right in front of my house! The family's teenage son is now driving it to school.

Classic. The 16-year-old boy who would dare to drive the minivan with flames... That's gotta be one self-assured young man!

______________________
*lalalalala*

So, am I back? Was I gone? It definitely seems that I have been on a blogging hiatus. It wasn't deliberate; I just couldn't bring myself to write anything. I kept telling myself, "just write anything, get back in the habit," but then months somehow went by...

I have some big news to share. I am going to start working on January 4. I am doing a long-term sub position at my old job (7th grade science teacher). The current teacher is going on maternity leave from Jan. 4 - Mar. 25, and the school called me to see if I would come back and teach for her.
It's not ideal timing for my son, who will have to go to preschool 5-days-a-week instead of 3. He'll also need to stay there later in the day. He's not happy about it.
It's a good opportunity for me, though! I've been out of the classroom for 9 years, and this is a great way for me to dust off my skills for a few months, to test out the waters again, before I really "go back to work." And we can really use the money!

2009-09-18T14:31:00.000-07:00

That last post was a total accident... but it's so nice, I think I'll just leave it!

summer memory

2009-09-18T14:19:00.000-07:00

aaaaah, summer...

Picnic in "Park Grandma"

and how are you?

2009-09-11T16:38:00.000-07:00

Today marks the end of our second week back at school. Well, not for The Boy, since his preschool starts this coming Monday.

Anyway.

Well.

I've been trying to stay in my "summer" frame of mind, and have been reasonably successful. "Don't let it get to you this year," I have been telling myself. "You feel much happier in the summer. Stay happy and just let the school-year frustrations roll off your back."

So.

Eight days of school, and I've got to get this off my chest:

Fourth graders should not be bringing home every book and notebook in their desks every night. This teacher is insane. Hello? Got a clue? Requiring each child to purchase $150 in school supplies (including a 2-inch AND a 3-inch 3-ring binder) takes balls, I'll give you that. AND THEN, on top of that, sending the 3-inch binder home every night, saying "it's too big for your backpacks, so put your books in your backpack and carry your binder" takes - well, it takes a complete detachment from reality. Because, what has now happened, ON TOP OF ALL THE SCHOOL SUPPLIES, is that parents have been going out and spending MORE MONEY on rolling backpacks for these kids. And that just does not sit well with me.

As a teacher, I happen to think that teachers should plan out their class so that the kids use their textbooks at school and their workbooks (or worksheets) at home for further practice (also known as homework). Sure, maybe in grade 7 or so they'll start needing to bring textbooks back and forth. Yes, I expect teachers to think about what they are requiring of nine-year-old kids. It seems to me that if you stop and think about a classroom full of nine-year-olds carrying full backpacks AS WELL AS a THREE-INCH binder, anyone in their right mind would say, "that's just wrong."

An example of one night's homework this week:
- Using the Literature textbook, answer four questions in the workbook about the story we read during class today (took Big Girl 3 minutes)
- Do these 6 problems from the math textbook (5 minutes, if that)
- Do these 6 problems from the math workbook (5 minutes, if that)
- Start studying for the test on Chapter One in the Religion book (and be sure to bring this book back and forth between home and school every day this week)

FIVE BOOKS (plus that god damn binder filled with spiral notebooks - can't do 6 math problems on a loose piece of binder paper and then file it in the binder later, can we?) for 15 (maybe 20) minutes of homework???? Are you kidding me???

Summer frame of mind, where did you go?

living under the smoke

2009-09-04T23:58:00.000-07:00

This Friday night sure feels different than the last Friday night. Last week, the fire was closer, there were visible flames and the smell of smoke in our house, and friends were leaving their homes (some were mandatory evacuation, some voluntary) to sleep where they could breathe. Today, the air quality has improved to moderate, the fire and smoke have moved east of here, and friends are home safe.

Last Saturday, Sunday, and Monday, the smell of smoke was unbelievably strong. The huge pyrocumulus cloud over the mountain was towering above us, with its base of gray-brown-orange and its top of fluffy bright white. It was mesmerizing. It was eerie and ominous. It was strangely beautiful.

The smell of smoke was so overpowering that I woke up Sunday morning nauseous and headache-y. The temperature outside was over 100 degrees, so we had the central air running all day. That filtered the air so that we could tolerate it. We could not stand to be outside. The AQMD listed the air quality as "hazardous."

A photo I snapped from The Boy's room of a medium-sized pyrocumulus cloud on Monday

Tuesday was a little different. The smell of smoke was not as strong as it had been. I could not see a pyrocumulus cloud, just grey cloud cover. Except it was not cloud cover, it was the smoke formation on top of us, so that I couldn't see it looking up into it. It stayed that way all of Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday. Finally on Friday (this morning), we woke up to blue sky over our house! And we could see the smoke cloud again, over to the east a bit.

A photo I took on Friday - again I missed it when it was big

On Wednesday morning I heard on NPR that the fire crews had done some work in the hills in our old neighborhood! The Boy and I took a drive up there to see what was going on, since we couldn't see the mountains from our new house through the smoke cover. The fire crews had bulldozed a fire line straight up the mountain from the our old neighborhood. It was 20-30 feet wide, and very striking. (Of course the photo is very hazy from the smoke!)

The fire was still on the north side of the ridge, and evacuations had not been ordered for the area, so our old neighborhood looked fine. We drove a bit farther east to do some errands, observing the smoke plume along the way.

I stole the following images off of the internet (taken with good cameras!):

The view of the mountain last weekend. Taken by Laurie.

A picture taken from south of downtown Los Angeles. Normally, the San Gabriel Mountains would be the backdrop of this photo! (I think I found this picture in the scpr.org photo gallery.)

the end of summer

2009-08-31T22:37:00.000-07:00

School starts tomorrow.

bummer.

During the school year, there's never enough time. The school day is tiring, and then kids need to do homework, practice violin, and go to soccer practice/girl scouts/dance class. Kids want to play with siblings and friends, have a little down time to read , or just daydream, but ... where did the time go? Bath and bed, hurry hurry hurry!

ugh, it's exhausting.

Since all that starts tomorrow, I should reflect on the summer that we've had.

What a summer! Some weeks were spent in camps or classes (arts, crafts, dance, girl scouts), and some were spent making our own adventures. We had lots of friends over, and threw a big party. We spent a month at Grandma and Granddad's house in Oregon. We played with our cousins and went to visit old friends we had not seen in years. We visited beaches, waterfalls, science museums, art museums, train museums, carousels, bowling alleys, miniature golf courses, libraries, aquariums, farms, funky doughnut shops, fancy ice cream shops, water parks, and birthday parties. We went to lots of free outdoor concerts, and I performed in one myself.

mmmmmmmmm....

so much freedom.

No wonder I'm so sad it's over.

I'd better go finish packing

2009-07-07T22:40:00.000-07:00

Today I saw the following license plate:

2ISGOOD

The license plate frame said, "One is not enough; Three is too many."

Is it just me, or is that really strange? How strongly do you have to feel about this to put it on your license frame AND pay for a personalized plate? And WHY would anyone feel that strongly about it? I'm baffled.

And, while I'm at it, is there some other context for these statements besides family size?

___________________

Tomorrow morning, we leave for Portland. I always take the kids there for at least a month in the summer. This year, summer seems shorter than normal, but we're still doing 30 Days At Grandma's House! I can't wait to spend lots of time with my three nephews and two nieces, not to mention my wonderful brothers- and sisters-in-law!

Summer's start

2009-06-19T22:24:00.001-07:00

Our first week of summer has come to a close!

Middle Girl did a little half-day-camp this week with the first grade teacher (the kids truly believe that she is magic).

Big Girl wrote all of her thank-you notes for her birthday yesterday, and today sorted through the huge piles of 3rd-grade work that she brought home. (The end of the school year is rough in this way - the mountains of stuff that comes home!) It took her two hours, but she did it! Now that she has ticked these two tasks off of the To-Do List, she can really relax into summer. She needs to work on her math skills regularly, and keep up the violin practice (recital coming up!), but in general she's in summer mode and I am so glad for that.

As for The Boy, I can't believe his first year of preschool is over! It's been a great year for him. His teachers were fantastic, and he had a lot of fun with his friends. He got over his shyness pretty quickly and really enjoyed himself. Now that everyone is home all day, I have stopped making him lie down for "rest time." That's the big news for him right now! Quietly, and without fanfare, Mommy has phased out nap. (He hadn't been sleeping during nap for several months. Believe me, I would still be giving him nap if he were.)

We had a nice weekend getaway to kick off our summer, traveling to my MIL's house and taking Big Girl to see "Wicked" as her big birthday event. She had a great time in the big, fancy theater, and she LOVED the show!

Looking ahead, I plan to spend the summer trying to say "yes." Once, during a Parent Ed discussion, the teacher pointed out the seemingly simple concept that parents don't always have to say "no" to their kids' questions. She challenged us to see if we can say "yes." Every time I try to think this way, it seems to turn out well.

"Mommy, can we go swimming?"

"Mommy, can we make a snow globe?"

"Mommy, can we play Go Fish?"

I'm going to try my best to alter my plans if necessary, and spend the summer saying "yes!"

A full day ... full of awesome!

2009-06-08T20:59:00.000-07:00

On Saturday I was on the road at about 8:40 am, headed north on my little solo adventure! I was going to enjoy some scenery, meet a blogger, and earn a little money! A diverse plan!

An hour or so into my drive, I saw this:

Cinderella's carriage, including the white horse! Right there on the freeway! Click on it to get a better look at it - really quite something.
No doubt it was headed to someone's wedding. Not the same wedding I would be working at, though!

I had some companionship in the car with me.

Meet my little friend, Mr. Garmin. (The Hubby's newest gadget.) He talked to me during the drive, telling me where to turn, which freeways to take, where to get gas... we didn't always agree, but that makes for more interesting conversation, right?

Here, Mr. Garmin is showing me that I should take Highway 101 to Highway 101. Very helpful, thank you, Mr. Garmin.

Now looky here! Mr. Garmin and I are in the middle of nowhere!
(I apologize for the blurriness. I was driving, yo. On the open road.)

Mr. Garmin tells me that we are right next to the ocean.

Look! He's right!

Thank goodness for Mr. Garmin; how else would I know to look out the window and find a headland so I can snap a pretty photo? :-D
(yes, while driving. The Hubby was not so happy about that...)

Also out the window of my moving vehicle...
I saw a lot of charred hillsides, after the recent fires in this area:

Then I saw the hillsides adjacent to the burn areas: this is how everything looked before:

PRETTY LAKE! PRETTY LAKE!

(I actually pulled off the road for that one.)

When I got to the town where the wedding would be held, a friend was there to meet me! I got to spend a couple of hours with Heidi from smalltown mom, and we had a lovely time! She showed me around, while we talked and talked. We peeked in shops, and found some fun socks (my recent interest in novelty socks is a sure sign that I am turning into my mother). Heidi even treated me to a delicious lunch!

We had to have a bloggers' meet-up shoe photo! (I forgot about the shoe photo! I chose my shoes that day based on comfort, not cuteness... but check out Heidi's sassy leopards!)

It was so wonderful meeting Heidi... I feel so fortunate to have gotten to know her better! (Heidi, we should have taken a picture of our sock purchases! Well, I'll put pictures of mine here; you can put a picture of yours on your blog, too!)

Hopefully Heidi and I will get together again sometime!

Well, I had to get to work. It was the reason for this trip, after all...

Wedding time!

The wedding was in one of the historic California Missions.

They were having a Catholic Mass for their wedding, and I was cantoring. This means I was singing LOTS of music. I was very happy with how I sounded, and believe me, this is rare. I am so picky and hard on myself, but I was feeling good about this one! I got really nice responses, too, and the Father of the Bride even tipped me an extra fifty bucks! (Note to self: bumping into the Father of the Bride after the wedding can be a good idea!) Clearly, this was one of those days: an absolute *GEM* of a day!

When I got home, the kids were SO EXCITED about their new socks! (I had no doubt they would be.)

I got two for myself, and two for The Boy, since his socks seem to be disappearing.

Everyone HAD to put them on IMMEDIATELY!

Penguins for Big Girl, horses for Middle Girl, trains and clownfish for The Boy, and Chuck Taylors and sushi (!!) for me!

I just love these kitschy-cute sushi socks!

I'll write more about the Chuck Taylor socks later ... I've got an idea for a future post!

Here are a bunch more photos from the day, for your viewing pleasure!

a wee road trip

2009-06-05T22:06:00.000-07:00

I'm excited about tomorrow! That fact that I'm excited about something is news in itself.

I've had plenty of things to get excited about in the last six weeks, it's not that... it's that I haven't been excited about anything. I've been feeling rather hollow.

Yes, I know what this sounds like. This is stuff I should be writing about, it would probably do me good to acknowledge it, talk about it...

But I'm not going to.

So, what have you been up to? Actually, I know what you've been up to - I've been reading your blog. Just haven't been able to muster up the energy to type out a comment. I'd like to tell you that your blog has made me smile on more than one occasion and thank you very much for that!

Me? Well...

Big Girl turned 9 years old on Monday! She had a couple of special playdates last weekend to mark the occasion, but no "party" per se. Instead, she asked to go see "Wicked." It's not playing here anymore, so we'll be making a "Wicked" pilgrimage next weekend!

Middle Girl graduated from Kindergarten on Wednesday! She's wistful about it.

The Boy is cute as ever, but getting more and more argumentative these days. Ah, well...

The girls performed in the school talent show. We made up a tap dance, and I made them some colorful, sparkly costumes. They were adorable!

My band usually performs at our town's 4th of July Picnic/Fireworks event, but they have cancelled the gig. Budget, it appears. We are pretty bummed about it. Trying to make the best of it, The Hubby and I have decided to have a party at our house, since the fireworks go off right overhead! I'm thinking pool party / barbeque / potluck / lots of socializing / fireworks show! I am looking forward to it.

AND I'M LOOKING FORWARD TO TOMORROW!

I have been hired to sing at a wedding a few hours away, so I'll be getting up bright and early and driving up to ... to ... the small town! Wahoooooo I get to meet small town mom tomorrow!

Yippee!!!!

Spring Break

2009-04-20T13:40:00.000-07:00

Last week my girls were on Spring Break. The main item on the agenda was "open-ended hanging-out time," which is SOOOO good for my kids. They do really well when we don't have to be anywhere!

I did take them to the zoo one day, and the oldest went to a birthday sleepover. My father-in-law came to visit late afternoon Friday - noon Saturday.

Thursday was the one "big" thing we did for Spring Break - The Hubby took the day off and we drove down to Legoland!

They have various American "cities" built out of Legos: New Orleans, Las Vegas, Manhattan, Southern California, etc. In Washington, D.C., they have replicated President Obama's* Inauguration! It's fantastic. I took pictures:

Look at Aretha!

When we got home, I did some googling and found out that they actually built it shortly before the Inauguration. I found a picture of what it first looked like:

It's very interesting to me that they went back and redid it to reflect what everyone actually wore! Here's the updated version, also from google:

*I just love saying "President Obama!"

Things that are making me feel good about myself

2009-04-02T13:16:00.000-07:00

1. My birthday.
My birthday was on March 22, and my family really did a great job. There was champagne and chocolates the night before, and then presents and dinner with The Hubby at the fondue place on the 22nd. The presents showed me they really know me: all things I love! New pajamas, cozy socks, Cadbury creme eggs, the DVD of Chuck Season 1, tickets to a concert at the Hollywood Bowl, climbing roses from my Mom, a $50 gift card to Nordstrom from my mother-in-law (do I even remember how to shop?). I'm feeling the love.

2. My haircut.
I finally got my hair cut about a month ago. It was in a horrible state: bangs so long I just brushed them to the side and didn't have bangs; ends so fried it didn't even look like hair any more. It was shapeless and long, and I HATED it!
When I first got it cut, the bangs were a little too short. But now that a month has gone by, the bangs are the right length and I have figured out how to style it correctly. I am so happy with it! I feel a million times better when I see myself in the mirror. I am walking taller.
I was trying to go without a haircut for as long as possible to save funds, but I should have just spent the money sooner! The improvement in my outlook was well worth it!

3. Daffodils.
They are in Trader Joe's and the grocery store. Little bunches of daffodil buds. About $2.00 for 10 stems. They just look like green blobs.
Then, you get them home and put them in a vase, and later that night, they have started to open.
The next morning, they are BIG, beautiful, bright yellow daffodil blossoms.
Their season is short. I am savoring it while it lasts!

4. New pajamas.
As mentioned above, my family bought me a new pair of pajamas for my birthday. They are just a simple cotton t-shirt and drawstring pants from Target, but ahhhhhhhh. Who knew that such a simple thing could feel so good? Such soft cotton... not threadbare, pilling, and falling apart, like the pajamas I was wearing. I put them on, and I feel like a million bucks!

5. My band.
Last Saturday, we had a gig (this precluded me from going to the bloggers' picnic). It was a small gig for us: playing at The Boy's preschool carnival. The preschool director had asked me for a favor - they needed live entertainment - and my guys delivered. Big or small event, they are terrific.
I sang lots of my favorite songs, in front of a crowd who knew only the "mom" side of me. It was fun hearing their surprised reactions: "WOW, you're so good!" "How long have you been singing?" All my life, and thanks!
My mom was here visiting, and she hasn't had a chance to hear my band before, so this was extra-, extra-special! (Most of my singing has been in the theatre, and she saw that a lot when I was growing up! But she hasn't had a chance since I started singing in bands three years ago.)
Singing with the band does make me feel good about myself, since it allows me to have an identity outside of "Mom," and gives me a chance to perform (I miss the theatre terribly). However, it can also give me opportunities to feel bad about myself, since I am really hard on myself and beat myself up over mistakes.

But this is a positive post. Being positive is another thing that is making me feel good (and just like going to the gym, it sometimes takes willpower), so I am not going to start down the road of things that are making me feel bad about myself. Unfortunately I can't stop my brain from going there, but I'm having my fingers focus on the positive!

Siblings and The Truth

2009-03-19T08:41:00.000-07:00

Last night was my Moms' Group. We meet once a month with an MFT to discuss - well, anything and everything!

Last night one of the moms brought up an interesting issue. Her sons are 6 and 3.5. Her 6-year-old has always been a kid who tells it like it is. You can ask him, "who spilled that milk?" and he will answer truthfully. He's not sneaky; he's an open book.

Her 3.5-year-old has started scheming a bit. It's very normal behavior at this age. He'll come in from the back yard and say "Mom, he took my basketball!" She'll then ask the older one what happened, and he was nowhere near his brother. The little one was trying to get the big one in trouble.

The mom's concern is that she might be setting up roles as "The one who tells the truth" and "the one who I can't trust" by asking them to each say what happened and then always believing the older one. It's hard for her, because she can, in fact, believe the older one; she is aware, however, that this could be problematic.

We discussed just talking to the younger one about the situation as if it were true, without bringing the older one in. "If he took your basketball, what would be a good thing to say in that situation?" Perhaps it's not important to find out The Truth and What Really Happened. Perhaps it's just important to talk to the kids in a positive, constructive way and leave it at that.

It's an interesting idea to contemplate and try to keep in mind as we navigate this tough, exhausting job of mothering. Sibling dynamics are a minefield. I recommend the book "Siblings Without Rivalry" by Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish.

Happy Saint Patrick's Day!

2009-03-17T14:40:00.000-07:00

(Update:
Previous chat: Saturday night, 3/14
Latest chat: Today, Tuesday, 3/17, innocuous banter, duration 10 min
Prognosis: positive)

And a Happy Saint Patrick's Day to everyone!

I had to spend the morning in a boring meeting for one of my volunteer duties, which was made even more difficult because I had two better offers!

One, the Kindergarten was having their big celebration in the park, in which they hunt for pots 'o' gold and leprechauns (and a school staff member dresses up as a leprechaun and prances around the far end of the park, then runs away and disappears before the kids can catch him/her), do rainbow-y and shamrock-y craft projects, have snack and green cupcakes, and play!

Two, my Irish citizen friend invited a few women over to her place for a morning tea. I would have enjoyed a cuppa, some soda bread, and great conversation!

But no, I was stuck for two hours discussing "systems and strategies for compliance" and other such yadda yadda, with The Boy in the chair behind me playing the DS.

When we were set free, we went to the park to catch the last part of the Kindergarten fun. We missed the leprechaun, though. :-(

Oh well, my perfect St. Patrick's Day it's not. Since The Hubby is away on a business trip and I'm parenting solo this week, there aren't any St. Patrick's festivities for me this evening, either.

But that's okay! I just really like this holiday and a few missed opportunities aren't going to get me down! It's St. Paddy's Day and I'm feelin' fine!

I've been lost in a time warp

2009-03-16T14:08:00.000-07:00

I am dying to tell you all ... those of you who still read my blog ... and one of you is Margaret, who I ran into in the grocery store yesterday so already knows about this ...

I've been lost in a time warp.

My particular time warp is 1991. I've been sucked up by 1991 and wonder when I'll make it out of this vortex.

Can you guess what has caused this time warp vortex?

I bet you can!

FACEBOOK.

Yes, I know, I was very anti-Facebook. No, I'm not sure how I feel about it now that I have signed up, but I was talked into signing up by one of my oldest friends last weekend.

AND THEN MY WHOLE WORLD EXPLODED.

Monday, I set up my Facebook page, not sure how many friends I wanted to have and trying to figure out what the Wall is, and what the News Feed is, and where I should be looking, and why isn't there an "About Facebook" button with some sort of tutorial? So I spent Monday clicking around and wondering about groups and fan pages and looking at the profiles and walls of the few people I had added to start me off. And snooping around the profiles of some other people from my past, not sure if I was ready to reach out to them.

Tuesday morning, just 24 hours after joining, I got a friend request that knocked me out of my chair. THAT GUY. The one who I met doing a show when I was 17 and he was 20 (we were near our 18th and 21st birthdays, though ... I was a senior in high school and he was a college dropout from Kansas who had come to California to crash with his dad). The one who, even though I had a long-time boyfriend who was away at college, I could not stop thinking about. The one who felt that he was too confused about his life and that I was heading off for bigger and better things (college at Stanford; and my parents were moving to Oregon to make it more complicated), so decided that we shouldn't have a relationship. The one who took me out on dates even though we weren't dating (the passionate talk and the making out sure made them feel like dates). The one who was a mother's nightmare (sorry, mom!).

The one who spent the last few months before I moved, while we did another show together, pretty much ignoring me and dating other people, but then spent the NIGHT before I moved telling me how much he loved me. The one who didn't call me for months after that, but finally did and we spent that night on the phone falling in love with each other. The one who promised this time would be different and he would be better about calling, but then broke that promise.

THAT GUY. We had such chemistry. We never did anything more than a little making out, but it was the talking and just the hanging out that we did SO WELL. We were so different, yet we seemed to fit. We were never given a chance, though.

I couldn't count on him. He had said all the right things but then not called for months too many times. I had given him enough chances.

I fell in love with someone a few months after that late-night phone call my freshman year in college. I would forget about everyone else I had ever known; I would forget my name; I knew that I would marry this man. And one year after graduation, he proposed. Yes, The Hubby!

Eventually, I would think about THAT GUY. I had written about him in my diary, after all, and I like to reminisce. When I got internet access and learned of yellowpages dot com, I looked him up. Other search engines came out, and I looked him up. I went to the memorial service of a mutual friend, and not finding him there, asked another mutual friend to see if she could find him and give him my phone number. I Googled him. Thinking he might have gone into the industry, I imdb'd him. I always found many listings for his name, but no way to tell if any of them were the right THAT GUY.

Eventually, I decided that it would be best not to know what happened to him, and certainly best not to find him. Despite the way things went between us, I have treasured memories of the time we spent together and the things that were said. I decided it was best to preserve it as it was.

THEN I JOINED FACEBOOK.
And the next day, THAT GUY. After all those times years ago that I tried to find him, it took less than 24 hours on facebook for him to find me! After SEVENTEEN YEARS. I stared at the Friend Request, trying to decide what to do. I went out for the day and thought about it. I went back and forth, feeling my heart beating in my throat.

I came back to the computer late in the afternoon. I didn't know what I was going to do. Staring at the screen, I took a deep breath and clicked "Confirm." I would just let whatever was going to happen, happen. I figured it would just be "hi, what are you up to? I have three kids. oh" and not much more, like what happens at high school reunions, and frankly, I worried that that would be a blow to my self-esteem yet again. But I had no idea what usually happened on facebook, so no idea what to expect.

Almost the very second my finger came back up from clicking "Confirm," a chat window popped up. I didn't even know there was chat in facebook! THAT GUY. Talking to me, live in a chat window. I almost threw up. I couldn't hear my kids playing right behind me, what with the beating of my heart. My fingers shook. I got all sweaty. And I remembered that it was his birthday!

We had a short chat. My exploded brain remembers it went something like:
me: "I can't believe I'm talking to you right now. Isn't it your birthday?" him: "Yep." me: "How old are you?" him: "39." him: "Your kids are cute." me: "Thanks, yours too!" him: "You look happy. Is it true?" me: "Yes, very." him: "I'm so glad to hear that." me: "This is weird." him: "Should I not have found you?" me: "I don't know yet." him: "I understand if you don't want to acknowledge me, but I have thought about you a lot." me: "I don't believe you." him: "well, it's true. I was a total mess then and I missed out on you. I'm so sorry." me: "I cannot believe this is happening right now."
And some pleasantries, and then I had to go make dinner.

And then I told The Hubby about it. He did not think it was a big deal. Why was I making a big deal about it? he wanted to know.

Because my not-a-relationship with him never had an ending! And I was not sure that I wanted it to have a postscript. Some things are better left alone, to reminisce about in our private thoughts.

The Hubby thought I was being silly. "Why don't you suggest that you two get together? Your kids can play."

"That would be WEIRD!"

"No, it's no big deal."

Well, he doesn't get it (I thought to myself).

The next day, a chat window popped up again. This time, our chat was longer, and it briefly touched upon the past.

Another day, another chat. Again and again. More delving into the past.

Then when he asked again if we should talk about exchanging phone numbers, I took a deep breath and punched my cell number into the chat window. Then I received a text message. Then I received a picture on my phone of his Wii avatar. Um, ooookay?

I told The Hubby about it. "Maybe it's weird," he said, thinking. "No, I'm sure he's just being friendly," he finished.

Saturday night I was up late after everyone went to bed, and another chat window popped up. This time, we really got into the past.

At some point, my fingers typed out the gist of my worries. "What if we see each other and find that we still have that chemistry?" I asked.

"I don't know," he said.

"I do know that the phrase "unfinished business" has never been more apt," he said.

"Yes! You get it!" I cried. Knowing that he totally understood what was weird about this was, for me, a huge relief.

Just knowing that I wasn't the only crazy one here has really calmed me down about the whole thing. It seems counterintuitive, but that's the effect it has had on me. My heart rate slowed back down; my fingers stopped shaking.

I was never sure if, back then, he had strong feelings about me or if it was all my overactive imagination. All these years, I have thought I might have been a silly 18-year-old girl about this. Finding out through these chats that it wasn't a figment of my fluttering heart actually is helping me exhale and move on to whatever this is going to be NOW.

This story is not over. We'll have to wait and see how it all unfurls.

Where did February go?

2009-03-02T22:41:00.001-08:00

Hmmm. It's March now.

I'm not sure how that happened.

I feel like I've been buried under a huge pile of volunteer duties. I can think of three big things right off the top of my head that I've been working on during the last two weeks.

I've also been going to the gym a bit more. I've been pretty good about going to a class twice a week since early October, and during the last couple of weeks I have been extra focused on making sure I get there. I am seeing NO RESULTS. Wheee!

The kids and I went to the zoo the other day. We enjoy reading maps! (We also enjoy watching industrious little orangutans!)

This month we started letting Turbo go outside in the back yard! He is very happy with the arrangement!

I think the tooth fairy is moving in! Since January 22nd, my two girls have lost seven teeth! Seven!

In fact, they lost four during the last week of February alone, including one each last Saturday! That's right, a double-tooth-fairy-visit!

And it's not over: Middle Girl has one more loose one, and Big Girl has three loose teeth!

They are falling out left and right around here!

My poor Boy keeps pulling on his teeth and despairing "when will I lose a tooth?" I can't blame him feeling left out right now!

Good genes

2009-02-25T12:33:00.000-08:00

Today, The Boy was running along ahead of me and his calves reminded me of my husband's.

And this, my friends? This is a very nice discovery.

what a weekend.

2009-02-17T14:50:00.000-08:00

What do you do with a rainy three-day weekend when you're pinching pennies?

One day, we went to our local independent bookstore (I cannot tell you how much I LOVE that place) because Middle Girl got a gift card for her birthday. Is your family like mine? Do you all just love to spend time in a bookstore, looking at book after book after book? (Thinking about the people who come to this blog... yep, you are all like that!)

Books seem even more comforting when it's raining outside, don't they?

A few of us saw books we wanted to read, but since we were only there for Middle to use her gift card, we decided to head over to the library.

Some time later, we left the library, with books and a DVD off the "New Releases" shelf.

We all came in the door and fell upon the couches to spend the rest of the afternoon with the books!

Later that evening, we slipped in the DVD. It was the final live Broadway performance of "Rent." (Parents of the Year, that's us!)

When you're a theater geek, and you are my age (23 when "Rent" came out - just starting out on your own after college), "Rent" is not just another musical! Heck, even The Hubby loves it, and he's not a theater geek!

After 12 years on Broadway, "Rent" closed last fall. They assembled an amazing cast for the final few months, including two original cast members, and filmed it for posterity. Many, many actors who had been in it through the years were in the audience. They dedicated the performance to Jonathan Larsen, who wrote this musical about "liv[ing] each moment as [your] last," "no day but today," "measure your life in love," and who died of heart failure the night before its first performance.

Man, I cried watching this. I cried and cried. I cried for the triumph of the show itself and how seeing the show and falling in love with an HIV-positive drag queen (you can't help but) has changed people. I cried for all the Closing Nights I've been in. I cried for how much I miss the camaraderie of cast members. I miss it so much, and I don't have anything in my life right now that feels like that.

A day full of books followed by a good, long cry. What a weekend!

Opinions, I Has Them

2009-02-12T14:59:00.000-08:00

Last night, at band rehearsal, we were discussing doing Coldplay's "Viva la Vida." The guy who's sort of our de facto music director said Coldplay didn't write that song, Joe Satriani did. This was his snide way of getting us on the topic of the plagiarism lawsuit. Well, he sucked me into an argument, he sure did!

I argued that just because two songs sound alike doesn't mean they purposefully plagiarized. He argued that “George Harrison, Michael Bolton, and others have lost cases like this, and those songs don't have the exact same melody like the Coldplay one! It's not just the same chords, it's the same melody!" I said, "I guess it'll have to be settled in court, although I'm not sure I'm comfortable with lawyers and judges deciding about musical creativity..." Then he proceeded to argue that the Grammy awards shouldn't have rewarded the Coldplay song. I said the Grammys shouldn't take a position on it before it's been decided in court - "they can't take sides in this!" I said. Which made him snort. Snort. "Go listen to the Satriani song," he said, and we dropped it and moved on to other topics, like the drama between members of our band!

When I got home, I listened to the Satriani song ("If I Could Fly"). It's easy to find comparisons on YouTube (they keep getting yanked off, so no use embedding), and the sample of it on iTunes is the section of the song that's in question.

Basically, my feeling is that yes, both songs do use the same three notes in their melodies. They also both go "two measures to play the three notes (A, B, A flat), then two measures sort of riffing on those notes, repeat." The riffing is not the same, but it is a similar idea. I think it's absolutely credible that more than one songwriter could have thought up that structure independently! I also think that had Coldplay known how similar "If I Could Fly" was, they would have changed up "Viva la Vida" a bit during the writing period. It's a risk with no payoff to knowingly copy an existing song. My verdict? No plagiarism. A situation that sucks for both sides, probably more so for Satriani, but life sucks. No plagiarism.

However, it might be worth mentioning that when "Viva la Vida" came out and I fell in LOVE with it, and wanted to hear it over and over, I was surprised that it was a Coldplay song. In general, I think Coldplay's music is positively coma-inducing. (I do like "Yellow" and "Clocks.") They write a song that doesn't really sound like Coldplay, and it gets accused of plagiarism? That's kinda interesting.

I prefer not to get sucked into arguments like this, but it definitely happens from time to time! My husband is intimidated by my strong opinions. Of course, he never argues, never ever ever. Does he have opinions and he just prefers to keep them to himself, or does he not have opinions? I don't know. And we've been together for seventeen years!

So in light of this "reputation" I have, it's interesting that my reaction to some recent news events is "ho hum, who cares?"

I'm talking about Christian Bale and Michael Phelps.

Christian Bale cussed out a crew member on a movie set. So what? This is the guy who lost 60 pounds, weighing only 120 pounds, for The Machinist. This is the guy from American Psycho. Guess what? He's crazy intense. We knew that. Why does anyone care about this "news" story?

Many have said it: who cares that Michael Phelps was smoking pot? He publicly said he was taking a break after the Olympics; one might expect him to go a little wild with the partying after so many years of extreme discipline. I've never smoked pot, because I'm a goody-two-shoes, and even I am nonplussed about this. Anyone who made him a "role model" for anything other than training for swimming is an idiot and needs to kindly remove their head from their fanny.

Now, Joaquin Phoenix. I'm worried. This hip-hop thing may or may not be a hoax, and the fact that his brother-in-law Casey Affleck is following him around with a grin and a videocamera instead of getting him help indicates that it probably is a hoax, but nonetheless Joaquin is not okay. Did you watch the Letterman clip followed by the clip from his appearance promoting Walk the Line? Bearded Joaquin can't form words or thoughts. It's worrisome.

Change

2009-02-01T00:02:00.000-08:00

I guess change was in the air this month! I've been planning to paint the upstairs bathroom since we bought this house in Oct. 2006. I even bought the paint at that time!

I don't know what finally motivated me to get out the brushes and get it done, but...

Here is what it looked like on Jan. 19, 2009, when a guy named Dubya was President...

...and now? Aaahh. A breath of fresh air!

(See, Internets, how I am keepin' it real? That's right, I left the crap on the sink and the ugly kids' towels on the towel bar, what of it?)

2009-01-27T09:05:00.000-08:00

Middle Girl is turning six on Thursday. She had her party last Saturday.

She decided she wanted a "pajama party." The guests came in their pajamas and brought a stuffed animal. We served pizza and cake, and then showed the Tinker Bell DVD. They ate popcorn and played with light-up bracelets in the movie room. The parents came to pick them up at 9 pm, so everyone got to stay up past bedtime yet still go home to sleep in their own beds. It was like a precursor to a slumber party - very appropriate for 5- and 6-year-old girls.

They seemed to have a ton of fun, if all the giggling was any indication.

Middle Girl is a wonderful hostess. She took good care of all of her guests. Is this a Middle Child thing? She seemed to be of the mindset that it's her responsibility to see that her guests are having a good time. My oldest, on the other hand, tends to think that everyone else should be making sure that she has a good time. I do think that's an Oldest Child thing. (Although, I'm an Oldest, and hope I wasn't like that as a kid... oh, I probably was.)

Middle Girl was very excited about the "Pajama Party" theme. So much so that she wanted a Pajama cake. I had to decorate the cake with drawings of pajamas! It was challenging drawing with my piping bag, but I managed two pajamas and two nightgowns, all in different colors and with hearts or polka dots. I thought it came out kind of sloppy, but everyone else thought it was great! Middle Girl loved it.

It was fun listening to the little girls' conversations. In one, they decided to take a poll: "Raise your hand if your dad eats dinner in front of the TV." "Now, raise your hand if both your mom and your dad eat dinner in front of the TV!" That was hilarious. Is taking polls a 6-year-old girl thing? (Our family always eats dinner at the table together, but since the party girls were at the table, my husband took his pizza into the TV room, which Middle Girl thought was so funny!)

____

We are going to do her family gifts on her "Actual Birthday," so I am getting the gifts this week. The Boy and I are making a run to American Girl Place as soon as I sign off! Bye for now!

History

2009-01-21T08:18:00.000-08:00

After dropping the girls off at school, where they would be watching the Inauguration with their classes, The Boy and I came back home. I still needed to eat breakfast, but I switched on the television first. There were Malia and Sasha Obama, in their colorful overcoats, heading through the Capitol Building toward the balcony and their seats. I sat down on the couch.

I would not leave the television until after the ceremony was over. In fact, it was after the Bush family boarded the helicopter and departed and everyone went back inside the Capitol. Breakfast would have to wait.

The Boy watched with me, wanting to know who everyone was as they came out onto the balcony. He identified the men by their ties (between the scarves and the ties, it was easy to identify them by color): he would later say, "there's Joe Biden in the blue tie."

Tears came to my eyes over and over again, particularly when I saw the huge crowd filling up and spilling out of the National Mall. We all want to be a witness to history, especially since so many of us feel ownership of this historical event. I am too young to have fought the hard fight for civil rights, but I did cast my vote for a man who would have been my choice regardless of the color of his skin. I helped make this day happen! WE made this day happen, all of us together. Just look at all of the people who contributed to this moment!

I think this is so important, too: this is no Affirmative Action. This is a man who is more Presidential than anyone I have ever seen. The Boy spotted him the first time they showed him walking through the Capitol Building, and shouted, "there's Barack Obama!" (Although sometimes he says "Arack Obama.") Obama may have more composure than anyone ever has. Imagine how that quiet confidence will come across in meetings with foreign heads of state.

The ceremony began. We saw Aretha and her fabulous hat. Not everyone can pull off that gigantic bow, but Aretha absolutely can. I loved it! We saw a quartet of world-class musicians (Jewish, Asian, African-American, and Hispanic) play a beautiful arrangement of "Simple Gifts." We saw Joe Biden become our Vice President, and then we saw Barack Hussein Obama take the oath of office. I stood up in my living room, wondering why I wasn't with a group of people - why was I holed up in my living room with only The Boy? I watched the Justice rearrange the words of the oath, and Obama pause to figure out whether he should fix the error (he decided to repeat them the way the Justice had said them). And then he uttered the words, "so help me God," and I burst into applause and tears at the same time! I picked up The Boy in a huge hug and swung him around.

Then The Boy said, "can we watch something else now?"

Of course, we didn't. We listened to Obama's speech (well, I did, and it was difficult through all of the "when will he stop talking?" whines) and appreciated once again that Obama doesn't think of this presidency as his, but truly thinks of himself as a representative of the people. It's striking.

I enjoyed the colors in the benediction ("the red man can get ahead, man"), and very much enjoyed watching that helicopter take off and fly away, getting smaller and smaller.

When the girls got home from school, I said, "what did you do today? Did you see history in the making?" Big Girl said, "we started learning cursive!"

They did watch it, but no matter how many emotions they see from me, they just can't grasp this. They will always live in a world where a black man has been President of the United States. They may never understand this the way we do. And you know what? Hallelujah!

I did manage to run one errand yesterday, but other than that, I felt like I spent the day in front of the television.

However, one cannot escape this moment in time: like many, my day included both celebration over a new President and consternation over a family member's recent layoff.

Please keep my brother-in-law in your thoughts.

Pass the Tissues

2009-01-20T08:07:00.000-08:00

Here we go! The Inauguration of Barack Hussein Obama. Our young country is making a giant leap forward! We're growing up, and we can't go backward now. Racism still exists, and there is still a long way to go, but here we are. And we won't be going back.

Pass the tissues!

Twitter's broken... hopefully they'll fix it soon 'cause I want to join the party!

photo challenge

2009-01-15T09:34:00.000-08:00

Laurie points out on her blog how hard it is to photograph Craftsman homes! I agree, and maybe that's why they're so appealing to the naked eye.

She issued a challenge to photograph Craftsmans, which I will humbly enter:

Irrational

2009-01-13T23:21:00.000-08:00

This morning, at 7:57 am, as I was pushing the kids out the door (late) for school, the phone rang.

Which is highly unusual at that hour, but I couldn't get it. We were late and had to get to school!

When I got back home, the caller ID indicated that it was our local hospital calling. There was no message.

"That's weird. Why is the hospital calling at 7:57 am?"

"Maybe The Hubby has been in an accident on his way to work...
I should check my cell phone and see if they tried calling that, too...
No, no calls.
I should call The Hubby at work to see if he is there...
but he is always in meetings and I can never get him on the phone and I just get his secretary so I try not to call there...
but I am going to worry about this all day if I don't just call and put my mind at ease...
This is silly. I'm sure it was just a fundraising call.
But at 7:57 am? That is very strange.
I had better call The Hubby.
No, I am being irrational. I should leave him alone.
I think I'll call The Hubby."

I called him. He was fine.
But why did the hospital call at 7:57 am?

Caller ID is a blessing and a curse.

Getting up to speed

2009-01-11T22:17:00.000-08:00

Yes, I'm home.

I actually have been for over a week. The drive home was easy, thank goodness. We split it into two days, including a chance to have dinner with some friends. We didn't need chains for the drive home, although it did snow on us a bit. Pretty!

The Portland snow, the likes of which hadn't been seen in over 40 years, was pretty much completely melted by the 27th. It sure was tough getting up there, but we were glad we got to see it and play in it before it was gone!

We spent our time in Portland playing with family. Playing, my nephew's baptism, then playing, and more playing!

We drove home on Jan. 2 & 3. This means I had to watch the Rose Parade on television FOR THE THIRD YEAR IN A ROW. It's kind of lame of us to live here but be out of town during the Parade. Maybe next year I'll be able to see it in person again...

The first week back to school after vacation is always kind of a shock to the system. It's kind of a feat just to make it through. By Wednesday, I woke up exhausted and with a headache, and didn't improve until the weekend. I did manage to get Christmas packed up and put away. I'm not quite as happy with my pack-up job as I was last year, but after several re-arrangements, it's all in the bins... so all's well that ends well.

This weekend, the kids spent some of their Christmas money. They all got things that go with their Christmas gifts. Big Girl got a DS from Santa, so she bought herself a case and a game cartridge. The Boy got a Leapster, so he chose a cartridge. And Middle Girl? Well, Middle Girl got an American Girl doll* from Santa, so she decided to order an outfit for Kit.

We also took the kids over to the golf course to practice on the putting green and the driving range. The Boy got clubs for his birthday from my MIL, so we had to go use them and enjoy the beautiful weather this weekend! Everyone shared the clubs and started working on these skills. I think it really warmed Daddy's heart to see them!

__

* She's been looking forward to having her own American Girl pretty much ever since Santa gave Elizabeth to Big Girl two years ago. Big Girl was 6.5 at the time. My rule is "no American Girl until you are six years old," which in some ways has been hard on Middle Girl: she has some fellow little-sister friends who got American Girls at the same time as their big sisters, so that they were four or five. Luckily, I can point to the "For Ages 8+" in the catalog and say, "see how Mommy spoils you? I won't make you wait until you are eight!" and she has been appeased.

She turns six at the end of this month. She spent the last year deciding which doll she would ask for for her sixth birthday, and the decision was made by summertime: Kit. I wanted to come up with a way to surprise her, though - it was so fun to see Big Girl's face when Santa surprised her with Elizabeth. There was an obvious answer - let Santa bring Kit even though it was before the sixth birthday.

And it worked! She was speechless. She couldn't bring herself to open the box and touch Kit, so amazed was she that Kit was really here. I had to help her! She just stood there, across the room, and pointed!

My Santa errand was so fun, too. I went over to American Girl Place to pick out the perfect Kit, and as I was taking all of them off the shelf and examining them, a wonderful store employee came over to help me. She was an African-American woman, probably in her fifties. She was much more picky about the dolls than even I was! She took the lids off the boxes, examining their eyes, hair, the way their clothes were sewn, the even-ness of their legs, and when she found the best three, she put them up on a shelf together (lids off) and talked to them. "Are you the one, honey? I'm feeling you. Oh, Kit, girl, you sure are hot right now..." She asked me which one I thought was best, and when I chose one, she said, "now I can say that that's the one I was feeling all along. She was meant to be the one for you..." It's kind of cheesy, I know, but I had the best time with her, choosing the right Kit for my Middle Girl! What a Christmas it was for Mommy.

Christmas Adventures!

2008-12-25T21:05:00.000-08:00

Well, we made it to Portland! We weren't sure we would.

They have been socked in with a record-breaking snowstorm for two weeks. My parents have been stuck up on their hill and were unable to prepare for our impending visit.

After the airport was closed for multiple days and my mother-in-law couldn't manage to fly up there, we started getting creative with our trip plans.

We had planned to drive up there in one day, to maximize The Hubby's days off. We then offered to extend it to a day and a half in order to detour over to my mother-in-law's to pick her up and drive her up there with us. Then things started getting crazy and The Hubby and MIL decided to drive straight through, timing the trip so that we do the Oregon portion during the day.

Meanwhile, I began to stress out that we shouldn't be going at that point at all, because we would be running the risk of getting stuck 60 miles outside of Portland, with six people in our car, and how much would that suck????

I was outvoted.

We left Monday night at 8:45 pm or so. We arrived in San Jose at 2:00 am. My MIL had been sleeping in her comfortable bed, so she got in and immediately took the wheel for a 2am - 6am shift so The Hubby and I could try to get some sleep (the quality of sleep in a car leaves much to be desired, even for the kids).

We were in Oregon at about 8:00 am Tuesday. The snow in the higher elevations was beautiful! Blue sky, sun, snow-covered mountainsides and trees!

Aside from the million straight hours in a car and the exhaustion from crappy sleep, the car trip went well until the last 60 miles. That's when we hit the snowy, icy, rutty roads and the slow going. My fears were coming true.

The Hubby tried to put chains on, even tried to pay the guy to help, but they were too small and wouldn't go on. He drove around, trying to find more chains to buy (all stores were sold out), almost getting stuck in the snow on the side roads.

Just guess at my mental state at that point. Just guess how the kids were doing, already in the car for 16 hours.

There was no way that even if we made it to Portland we were making it to my parents' house, without chains, and since my parents had no supplies it would be kind of rude of us anyway. The plan was to go to my brother-in-law's place.

There was more drama around the fact that my mother-in-law was supposed to be going to my other brother-in-law's house and we were trying to arrange a meet-up somewhere with him (he lives way on the other side of Portland). There were many cell phone all made to try and arrange that. MANY CELL PHONE CALLS.

Then Big Girl started having severe pain behind her knee, causing me to freak out. None of us could take much more.

Freeways were closed, the meet-up was impossible, we had no chains, but we made it part way down my BIL's snowy street and walked the last short distance to his house!!!

After 22 hours in the car, we were in a house! A house of loving relatives including my 15-month-old niece! The kids were ecstatic, and I didn't care what happened from there, I was not in that car anymore!

We ate, played, and collapsed in bed.

The next morning, we all felt like new people. More snow was falling, and the kids went outside to play! What a heart-warming sight that was for me.

The Hubby got the chains on the car, with BIL's help. He thinks they were smaller since they were colder.

After such rejuvenation, we were feeling up to visiting a grocery store (Christmas Eve crowds - that's okay) to restock my parents' house, and attempt the drive up the hill.

It wasn't long until we were with Grandma and Granddad! What a happy reunion!

We had a lovely Christmas Eve dinner with them, and Santa came in the night.

Christmas morning.
Children discovered the surprises he left for them, even better than they had expected, presents were opened and enjoyed.

More snow began to fall and we all went outside to play and build a snowman!

For a bunch of Southern Californians, it truly was a Christmas Day to remember!

The Hubby and I are now, Christmas night, babysitting our niece. It's BIL's birthday today and he's got NBA tickets. His babysitting plans fell through and we were happy to step in as our birthday gift to him.

We'll soon have to try to get back up that hill, so hopefully we won't be stuck down here with our kids up at Grandma's... We're cautiously optimistic about that!

Handmade for Christmas

2008-12-25T20:35:00.000-08:00

This year, I actually managed to do the Christmas baking I always hope to do! In general, I had to cut way back on our gift-giving this year, regretfully so. However, there were a few people (The Boy's teachers, the moms who bring Big Girl home from school...) who I really wanted to thank in some sort of Christmas-giving way.

So I made Christmas baking a priority!

I baked Maple Pear Pies, Zucchini Bread, and three kinds of cookies (candy cane, ginger snap, and sugar puff). I also bought my current holiday obsession from Trader Joe's, Candy Cane Joe-Joe's.

I wrapped up the cookies I baked and the Trader Joe's cookies into one package, and affixed a note: "Some sweets to enjoy now, and some to save for later when you need a little Christmas!"

So I had the cookie packages, the Maple Pear pies, and the zucchini bread loaves, as well as some custom return address labels I designed and printed for people. I hope it spread a little of the Christmas spirit and conveyed my feelings of thanks!

The girls also got into the spirit of handmade gifts!
For their best friends, they made bread dough picture frames. Here they are baking in the oven for 2 hours:

And here they are after baking!

We added some touches to highlight that they were handmade and personal!

After sealing the frames, we added a photo of the friendly pair to each frame.

We're all very pleased with them!

Holiday Home Tour

2008-12-22T00:04:00.000-08:00

I have emerged from hiding to participate in JenontheEdge's Holiday Homes Tour!

Welcome to my house!

It's a good thing I bought the poinsettia garland and the wreath last year. We had to pare down our Christmas quite a lot this year, so no new decorative items this year!
Where I live, we have to put decals on the windows to see snowflakes!

Come on in!

The first thing you'll see is the Christmas tree! (It's real - a Noble Fir.) It's a bit smaller than usual, so we put it up on a pedestal of sorts, and I found some fabric in the basement to use as a makeshift three skirt.

We have a six-month-old male kitten in our house. He is presciently named "Turbo." He is not allowed outdoors at this point. All of these things add up to:
No ornaments on the bottom portion of the tree! No breakable ornaments on the tree at all this year (those we left in the storage box)! And still, I have to put portions of the lights back on every day. A Christmas Tree is like Disneyland for a kitten!

Here is my new ornament for this year. Luckily, it was purchased in Quebec City in June, when The Hubby and I visited for our anniversary trip-without-kids ("luckily" because that was before I knew we'd be having a moratorium on unnecessary expenditures)! Ah, Quebec City, one of my favorite places on Earth!

In that picture you can see part of last year's new ornament. It's the retro toy ornament - what Fisher Price's Little People looked like when I was a kid!

The Christmas Tree is located in our living room, to the right of the front door. We have windows on either side of the front door, so you can see the tree and its pretty colored lights from the street!

Also in the living room is the mantle, an important location for Christmas decorations!

The stockings are all handmade. Mine was made for me by my great aunt when I was a baby; all of the others were handmade by me!

The Nativity was given to us by The Hubby's Grandma when we were newly married. Several years ago, the angel's hook broke and she fell and her wing shattered. So my Nativity has a fallen angel (actually, technically, a missing angel). What do you think that means?

The Hubby's Grandma gave us a set of, like, ten Christmas bears one year. Each year I find them someplace to inhabit during the Christmas season. This year, I put some on each speaker.

The sofa table against the wall has my son's birthday cards. His birthday was Dec. 14, and he turned four. It was a highly successful fourth birthday. So successful I didn't manage to blog about it!
The accent table has the card holder. I love getting Christmas cards! I have a few friends who write their Christmas letters in poem, which I love. I have done that myself in previous years - but I haven't written a letter in a few years. Just a photo card, and I'm lucky to get that done in time. This year, it looks like people will be receiving ours on the 26th.
In addition to the card holder, we also have toy Santa, Mrs. Claus, and Reindeer. Fisher Price Little People, as a matter of fact!

This is my formal dining room. The chair covers are great, aren't they? The Hubby's Grandma gave a set of four to everyone in the family one year. So we go to each others' houses, and we're greeted by those same chairs! They really Christmas-ify the place in a hurry! You can also see the children's school Christmas crafts on the door. I love those and keep them from year to year to add to the door!

My mom made that table runner out of some fabric she had left over after making my daughters some Christmas dresses a few years ago.

I put the Christmas Checkers here this year:

Hanging from the china cabinet knob is a reminder of what we should be doing during the Advent season:

Here's the breakfast table: placemats made by my mom, a candle centerpiece made by Big Girl in Kindergarten, and a little train candle holder.

Next to the breakfast table, greeting us in the morning? Our countdown and The Boy's advent chain!

There are no Christmas decorations on the second floor, except for these stockings I put up on the landing.

Here's a recipe for you:
Take one hallway shelving unit, full of family photos.
Stick the Christmas figurines The Hubby's Other Grandma gave us in front of the family photos, and tuck silk poinsettias and holly in every available spot.
Done.

The earth-toned decorations went in the bathroom this year. A little scene in the corner of the counter, and a Santa pulling a sleepy reindeer in his sleigh on the wall shelf.

The counter top decoration is a snowfamily of five. "Count Your Blessings." As the mom in a family of five, I love it!

This little hand towel goes well in this bathroom.

In the family room, we've got the kids' decorations. A little tree they can decorate to their hearts' content, a toy Nativity set (Fisher Price Little People again!), and matchbox music boxes! Oh, and a paper 3-D snowman Big Girl made today!

We can't let you leave without noting our doorway decorations! We've got Rudolph and friends over the dining room door,

slip-sliding reindeer over the family room door,

And mistletoe over the living room entry way! Caught you, now I've got to kiss you! (((smak))))
The neighbor boy and his dad went fishing over Thanksgiving, climbed into a tree to collect mistletoe, and then the boy and his sister packaged up the mistletoe and sold it for $1.00 each. (But they gave us ours as a gift.) Cute, huh?

As you leave, you see the front door again, and the window on this side with decals the kids put there. So the front door windows have the tree on one side, the decals on the other.

Bye! Admire my kids' art on your way out!

Thanks so much for stopping by!

And now that we're back outside again, I see that the lights have come on! I put some around the front door, and some on the ground along the walk. Cheery!

A beautiful pack-up job

2008-12-11T08:17:00.000-08:00

As I unpack the Christmas decorations, ornaments, and lights, I am struck by what a great job I did last year of packing them up. Really, truly, it's a beautiful pack-up job.

It makes me feel like I could never get them packed back up so well this year. And even if I could, the thought of doing it makes me feel oh, so tired.

It makes me want to leave them packed up and forget it this year.

But I won't. Out they come!

The things I do for this family! ;-)

Christmas Music

2008-12-07T12:39:00.000-08:00

It is our tradition to queue up our Christmas songs while we are putting out our decorations, and pretty much all the time from then on until Christmas.

Right now I'm listening to the Barenaked Ladies' Holiday CD , "Barenaked for the Holidays." (It has some Hanukkah music, including one particularly lovely one called "Hanukkah Blessings.") It is such a fun collection, I couldn't pick just one song. The Barenaked Ladies know how to put together some sweet harmonies, and their use of guest artists Michael Buble and Sarah McLachlan is inspired. Go to iTunes and give it a listen!

We have kind of an eclectic collection, starting with "Now That's What I Call Christmas" and its mixture of classics sung by the likes of Gene Autry, Johnny Mathis, Burl Ives, Frank Sinatra, Bing Crosby, and Dean Martin, to newer favorites like "Happy Christmas", "Do They Know It's Christmas?", The Carpenters, Kathy Mattea, Bruce Springsteen, and Harry Connick, Jr., to recent pop tunes I could do without (Britney Spears, N'Sync). We also have jazzy CDs, Vince Guaraldi ("A Charlie Brown Christmas"), and "Christmas with the Rat Pack."

One of my favorite new tracks is Shawn Colvin singing "Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas." Go listen! Right now! And then come back!

I don't have this one, but I think Clay Aiken's "O Holy Night" is my favorite version of that song. His voice is amazing.

I'm thinking of buying a new one this year: "The Hotel Cafe presents: Winter Songs." It's got KT Tunstall, Sara Barielles, Ingrid Michaelson, Colbie Caillat, and Fiona Apple, among other talented women!

__________________

And, on a separate note but still on topic, my church choir will be performing in our annual Advent Concert tonight. All of the choirs get together to share with each other, and the parish as a whole, some music of the season. This year, the school choir will also perform, so my oldest daughter will be participating as well! This is making it a million times more special for me. I'm looking forward to sharing the performance experience with my daughter tonight!

snapshots

2008-12-03T16:00:00.000-08:00

It's been ... TWELVE DAYS since the last time I came here to write, which is way too long in and of itself, but the scariest part is that it feels like MONTHS.

Big things going on.

I was planning to do a Thanksgiving post of just pictures - you know, where they speak for themselves? But then I kept forgetting to TAKE THE PICTURES (hello) and most of the big things I need to talk about don't have pictures.

So, I'm turning it into a wordy post instead.

We had family here for Thanksgiving for the first time ever! My mom flew down from Oregon, my mother-in-law drove down from the Bay Area, and my brother and his wife live in L.A. now - so they came over and stayed the night to be ready to do the cooking. Yes, my brother did most of the cooking! My Brother the Food Snob, as I have referred to him before. YUM YUM YUMMY YUM.

(My Mom made a special mid-day snack platter for the kids!)

(My Brother the Food Snob had a very attentive audience while he was cooking. "This is better than the Food Network!")

(I captured the table before dinner - looking so nice - but then while we were eating, my brain became soaked in gravy and I forgot my own name, much less the fact that cameras had ever been invented)

In the few days after Thanksgiving with our visitors, the grandmas took the kids to see High School Musical 3 (AGAIN!), and we all went out to the beach to do some walking (and found an arcade!) and eating.

And what did The Hubby and I do while everyone was at the movie?

Had a big financial conversation.

Bummer.

So, having determined that we have no money left this year for Christmas (and that we will have to change our lifestyle even in "normal" months), we decided exactly what to get the kids and started researching deals.

I don't shop on Thanksgiving weekend, but I did lots of online research.

Compounding our finances-related stress are some things that, well, came at a bad time:

The oven broke on Friday (the repair was completed today)

Our annual clean-the-roots-out-of-the-main-sewer-line preventative maintenance

Vet bills, vet bills, vet bills, ongoing vet bills...
(work, work, damn antibiotics)

(This is The New Kitten as of Monday's vet visit. Like I said, ongoing vet bills...)

The Boy's fourth birthday is in ELEVEN DAYS. I had to figure out how to throw him a party on our (non-) budget: when? where? who?
After phone calls, online research, and some cursing while using Evite for the first time, it's scheduled for Saturday the 13th. At our house. Entertainment? Provided by Mom. Cake? Mom. The best news? It's just what he wants.

And tonight is the girls' Christmas Concert! Let the ~~insanity~~ merriment begin!

My Hero

2008-11-21T10:45:00.000-08:00

In the same breath that I announce that The Boy deserves the award for "Biggest Whiner" (he's at that age where EVERY SENTENCE comes out as a whine), I also announce that he deserves the award for "Mom's Hero of the Week."

Isn't that an interesting pairing.

He goes to preschool on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday mornings. Tuesday and Thursday mornings are our time alone together. Isn't that a nice schedule?

Well, this week, our time alone together sure was a drag.

On Tuesday, I had to run a very small errand at IKEA, to pick up an item so that the people coming to stay in our new basement guest room for Thanksgiving will have a place to hang their clothes. A $13 errand. And... you know... whatever else I found in the Marketplace...

IKEA is about 30 minutes away (and.... hey! I just looked it up on Google maps and it says 18.7 miles, 27 minutes! I was actually right about a driving-related estimate!), so we left our house at 9:30 am to get there right when it opened at 10:00.

By 11:20, I was not quite all the way to IKEA, and I had not been able to get a hold of anyone to pick up Middle Girl from Kindergarten for me. I had to turn around and head back. The Boy, who at this point had been sitting in the car for almost two hours, was thirsty, so we pulled into the first thing I saw (Target) and visited the drinking fountain and potty (that was smart of me). Then we drove back home to Middle Girl's school.

There was an overturned big rig blocking all but one lane of the freeway. We had been stuck in the traffic for over 90 minutes. Whee! Great use of time and gas: altogether a 2.5 hour trip in which I didn't even get all the way to my destination, let alone obtain the $13 thing I needed. No, I have not tried again.

Then, on Thursday, our other day of Time Alone Together, I took The Boy to a boring meeting at church where he entertained himself with the Leapster and some snacks. Also crawling around under the conference table. (Looking at people's shoes? Their toenail polish colors? Who knows.) We had to leave the meeting before it ended to take Turbo The Kitten to his appointment with (Remember this?) the Veterinary Dermatologist.

The Veterinary Dermatologist was running very late. His first appointment of the day had been over 30 minutes late and he was backed up. This was terrible news to me, since I had already put The Boy through a boring meeting! Now he had to wait in the waiting room for what turned out to be 45 minutes! I had paper and pen in my purse, so he did practice writing his letters, and he visited the potty a few times, but whoo! that much waiting in one morning is A LOT to expect of an almost-four-year-old boy.

Dear The Boy,
Thank you for putting up with boring, extra-frustrating-and-long errands TWO MORNINGS IN ONE WEEK. I would guess that you appreciate your school days much more after that! The good news is that Grandma and Noni are coming to visit, so next week's days off school will be SO MUCH FUN!
You make me feel like a lucky Mommy for having you.
Love,
Mommy.

Even though the wait was long and difficult (see: almost-four-year-old boy who already sat through an hour-long meeting), I think it was a very good thing I took that crazy kitten to the Veterinary Dermatologist.

Turbo's swollen paw didn't really respond to the two antibiotics the other vet tried, and an expensive fungal culture showed no growth, so I was dubious that it was an infection.

But I was wrong.

The Veterinary Dermatologist took a little sample and looked at it under a microscope, discovering that it is "teeming with multiple types of bacteria." Yes, that is gross, you are right. But I was nonetheless glad to have the start of an answer about this swollen paw that we have been dealing with since October 6! He did a culture of the sample so we can find out exactly what bacteria we are dealing with.

The best part of the story happens now:
He gave Turbo some kind of new, special antibiotic. He took pictures of the paw and told me to come back in 14 days for the next dose and more pictures. He did not charge me for the antibiotic and will not charge me for the next dose or the re-check fee, because if this antibiotic works, the pharmaceutical company will pay him for the photos! TRA LA TRA LA TRA LA!

In other news, he did say that this kitten is quite a handful. On top of that, the other vet had written the following in Turbo's file:
"Feisty."

Ha! I'm right! He does have above-average energy!

Perhaps we should have been more careful when choosing a name... was it a self-fulfilling prophecy?

A future in interior decorating

2008-11-17T13:27:00.000-08:00

As I rounded the corner to head upstairs, I came across something...

The Boy has quite an eye, don't you think?

Reason #68 why I love this town

2008-11-16T23:04:00.000-08:00

It was on the list of top 10 cities in LA County against Prop 8.

And we're not even on the Westside!

It's a bedroom community (what does that mean, anyway?), full of families who come here for the schools.

What a nice place to live.

Pretty pictures for a Friday

2008-11-14T10:53:00.001-08:00

Sometimes, if I'm driving along and I see a gorgeous house and I've got my camera with me, I stop and take a picture of the house.

Look what I found in my archives:

I park in front of this one when I go to the gym.

You can't really see it, but there is a drop-dead gorgeous porte-cochère.
It looks like a tree is growing out of the chimney. Sorry about that; I snapped this photo really fast.

Oh my Lordy, if we won the lottery I would totally buy one of the houses in this neighborhood. Making sure there was enough money leftover to have someone clean it for me on a regular basis. And for a gardener. *** Le Sigh ***

Those houses, breathtaking as they are, are not representative of the local architecture. One of the things I LOVE about our town is that all of the homes are so different from one another - so we really have ALL types here.

That being said, the California Craftsman style started here in this very area, and it is GORGEOUS.

My old house kind of paid tribute to the style...

**Sigh** again. I love my new house, but I really do miss my old one, too.

This is for Jess. I'm not sure that she will see it, but it's for her.

This is my old house's stove:

And this is my new house's stove and two ovens:

(All pictures are mine except two of them. Google Images.)

Vet bills and strep throat

2008-11-12T14:19:00.000-08:00

A little while back, I wrote about my cat being ill.

We were having a rough stretch. One which may be coming to a close (knock on wood!).

Turbo (aka "The New Kitten") first had an irritated intestine (I will spare you the sign that told me to take him to the vet) and was put on an antibiotic for 10 days; just when those 10 days were up, his right front paw was swollen and I had to take him back in. More antibiotics and diagnostic cultures. When that antibiotic was done, the paw was swollen in a different area; I took him back in. They put him on a different antibiotic. The cultures were negative, so no answers as to why the paw is swollen. Fast forward to today, the paw is still swollen, and I need to take him to a dermatologist (A VETERINARY DERMATOLOGIST... OF ALL THE...), but you'll soon understand that I am taking a break from vet visits and vet bills. He is a very lively kitten (one might call him a maniac), so the paw doesn't seem to be bothering him. Still, this task is on my list.

Aaaanyway,
While all this swollen paw business was going on with Turbo, we noticed that our 11-year-old cat Dino was not acting right. He wasn't sitting in our laps, he was just staying to himself under a chair in the living room or under our bed. Then we noticed he was walking really shakily and slowly, the bones in his back were very sharp when I petted him, and he was throwing up fizzy bubbles. I decided to keep him in my room with his own food and litter, to see if he was eating. This experiment shows that he was NOT eating.

I took him to the vet. They wanted to run a lot of tests. I picked a few of them. They gave me some pills to give him - including an appetite stimulant and anti-nausea medication. Shortly thereafter (I had only given him one dose, and it was impossible getting that pill down his throat - I'm not sure I was successful), they called me report that all of the tests had come back negative; they wanted more tests. They scared me with this fact: cats go into liver failure very quickly if they don't eat. I gave Dino 24 hours to see if the appetite stimulant would get him to eat. No dice.

Back to the vet. We decided to admit him for hospitalization so that they could put him on an I.V. They ran more tests. The money was flying out of my bank account.

After Day 1 of hospitalization (I pre-paid for 2 days), they called me with an update. The tests were negative. They could do another test. He still wasn't eating. I had some questions for them: "What would you recommend if I don't have any more money?" and "If we were to do this other test, and it came back positive, what would we do to treat it?"

The answer to both questions was "keep doing what we're doing." Well, that answers that! We did not do the other test.

I went to visit him during Day 2, and brought him some tuna. He was SO HAPPY to see me, rubbing all over me and climbing in my lap for scritches. Then he ate a bunch of the tuna! Hurrah!

He has been home for almost two weeks now. He seems to be almost back to his old self. I've been feeding him "the good stuff," and he is eating more and more each day. He sits on my lap when I watch TV, and he has started wrestling with Turbo. He just LOOKS BETTER. They suspect it was pancreatitis, but we didn't run the further tests to know for sure. I have been spoiling him ever since he got home!

When Dino had been home for about 5 days (he was eating pretty well but was still weak and was keeping to himself), Middle Girl and I came down with strep throat. The ten days of antibiotics and feeling crummy are nearly over for us.

Quite a run we've been having!

Let's hope it's in the past (KNOCK WOOD!)

Now, about that Veterinary Dermatologist...

Hide and seek

2008-11-11T17:11:00.000-08:00

"One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven, twelve, thirteen, fourteen, fifteen, sixteen, seventeen, eighteen, nineteen, twenty!
Ready or not, here I come!"

"Not ready! Not ready!"

"One, two, three, four, ... Ready or not, here I come!"

"Not ready! Not ready!"

Both sides seem to be missing the point of "Ready OR NOT!"

_______

"...Ready or not, here I come!"

(Loud whisper heard from under the living room sofa:)
"Hey! Find me last! I'm supposed to be the counter next!"

_______

(Strange banging noises coming from the living room.)

Someone is tired of hiding, getting worried, and giving the counter a clue!

_______

"I'm not playing Hide and Seek any more! It's boring!"

(It took a while to find them this time. Someone got tired of hiding!)

quite clear

2008-11-10T23:07:00.000-08:00

It seems like everyone is saying that Prop 8 passed because people were confused about the wording.

In other words, if a person went into the polls thinking, "I support gay marriage," they might think "I say 'yes' to gay marriage; that means 'Yes' on Prop 8."

For argument's sake, let's assume that's true; that the wording of Prop 8 was confusing.

Well, then, a person who went into the polls thinking "I say 'no' to gay marriage" might vote "No" on Prop 8.

Those confused people would cancel each other out.

Prop 8's passing cannot be blamed on people being confused.
__________

Now, to the other point: was the Prop confusing?

Here is what the ballot said:
"8: ELIMINATES RIGHT OF SAME-SEX COUPLES TO MARRY.
INITIATIVE CONSTITUTIONAL AMENDMENT.
YES -> O
NO -> O
Changes California Constitution to eliminate the right of same-sex couples to marry. Provides that only marriage between a man and a woman is valid or recognized in California. Fiscal Impact: Over next few years, potential revenue loss, mainly sales taxes, totaling in the several tens of millions of dollars, to state and local governments. In the long run, likely little fiscal impact on state and local governments."

I am sorry to say, that wording is quite clear. Even if you were confused by the signs and bumper stickers you saw around, once you had that ballot in front of you in your chosen language, you were confronted with "ELIMINATES RIGHT."

Do you want to ELIMINATE THE RIGHTS of people, YES or NO?

Quite clear.

Especially when you compare it to the wording of other Props:
"7: RENEWABLE ENERGY GENERATION. INITIATIVE STATUTE."
This sounds good, right? But it was a poor plan for renewable energy, and it wasn't supported by environmental groups. The People knew to vote No, and they did.

"4: WAITING PERIOD AND PARENTAL NOTIFICATION BEFORE TERMINATION OF MINOR'S PREGNANCY. INITIATIVE CONSTITUTIONAL AMENDMENT."
Interesting. You'd think the people who voted Yes on 8 would have liked this one. But 52% of Californians voted NO.

So which one was "confusing?"
________

To end on a good note, however, let's look at the last time Californians voted on a gay marriage ban: March 2000.

That year, 38% of Californians voted "NO" to banning gay marriage.

This year, the number was 48%. Looks like progress to me!

The tide is turning!

(I can't help it; I'm an optimist)

Mom! You're crying AGAIN!

2008-11-05T09:47:00.000-08:00

I had tears in my eyes and a big smile on my face as I left my polling place yesterday. I had just had the privilege of casting a vote for Barack Obama, and I had done so with two of my children's hands holding the marking pen along with mine.

What an honor it was to be able to vote for this man for President of the United States of America. To choose him, with his intellect and indefinable talent, to lead our country. It felt like I was voting to shape our history, and not just our racial history, but who we will be as a country as the world's people continue to be more and more interconnected.

The honor brought tears to my eyes several times during the course of the day; having two of my children with me, participating, reminded me that this vote is about them - it's about the future - and I was choked up with pride.

We watched the election returns with our children, and when the west coast polls closed and the networks went ahead and projected Obama as the President-Elect, I began to cry again. My older daughter noticed, and said, "Mom, are you CRYING?!"

"Yes, honey, I am. I'm just so proud of America today."

After the last two elections, I wasn't sure I would ever feel that way again.

We let our girls stay up for a few extra minutes to watch Obama's speech. (It's nice to live on the west coast!)

"MOM! You're crying AGAIN!"

I tried to tell them what a big deal this is. What it means to have the first African-American President. They were surprised that in the history of the United States, there had never been a non-white President. They can't grasp the significance - in their minds, what does skin color have to do with anything? That, in itself, is a beautiful thing.

We're so glad our children were able to witness this event, to go to the polling place and make the mark, to see the numbers come in, to hear the words spoken about the occasion.

It feels like a new day!

_________________________________

There was one other mark on the ballot that I had my children help me with. Proposition 8, banning gay marriage in California.

After voting for President, I put The Boy back down and went through the ballot quickly - mark, mark, mark, mark, mark.

Then I got to Prop 8. "Help me with this one, this one is really important too," I said.

This vote was for my children, for everyone's children.

We all grabbed the pen and marked the NO spot.

Children who grow up and discover that they are heterosexual are no better than those who grow up and discover that they are LGBT. No more deserving of acceptance. I want my children to know that, no matter whom they fall in love with when they grow up. We marked the NO spot.

The ballot measure is not called yet, but so far, it is passing. 52% of the votes counted so far (95% have been counted) have been "Yes" votes. Votes in favor of discrimination. In the state of California.

In the state of California, it is still OK to discriminate against LGBT people. They are people. We voted to keep chickens in more humane cages (Prop 2), AND we voted to discriminate against people.

California, I don't understand you.

My elation and pride this morning are incomplete.

Halloween 2008

2008-11-04T23:08:00.000-08:00

(Throwing some pictures up real quick before I head off to bed... I'm excited to reflect on Election Day when I can think more clearly... What a day. What an honor it was to participate.)

School parties and parades

(The Boy's school doesn't allow costumes, and in fact calls the day "Orange and Black Day," so he is dressed in orange and black for school.)

Finishing touches on our house's decorations

My brother and Middle Girl carving a pumpkin
(Her original jack-o-lantern collapsed in a moldy, mushy heap, right before our eyes.)

Two families came over to have dinner (pizza!) and go trick-or-treating.

Half of the grown-ups took the kids out, and other half stayed home to hand out candy.

Last year, the marching band was practicing during trick-or-treating, and this year there was a football game going on! Apparently, the high school marching band provides the soundtrack of Halloween in our neighborhood!

Big Girl and her friend C. thought "The Spooky House" was AWESOME! while the other kids were too scared and stayed back. Other than that, all seven kids (including The Boy!) were enthusiastic trick-or-treaters.

Arriving back home with heavy loot bags, the big girls headed upstairs to do some trading. I don't know who came up with that idea, but they were very serious up there going through their candy and trading with each other for their favorites!

It was such a great day and night, with beautiful costumes, happy kids, and a fun group of adults!

And now: SO MUCH CANDY.

There's been a delay

2008-11-03T23:20:00.000-08:00

There's been a delay in putting up Halloween pictures.

The good news is that Sunday evening I was busy - out with some mom friends.

The bad news is that today was spent in medical offices.

This morning, Middle Girl woke up with a painful throat. Remembering the notice that came home last week about strep in the Kindergarten, I knew that she would be going to the doctor instead of school today. We got Big Girl and The Boy to school, and since the earliest pediatrician appointment was at 2:50 pm, we went to Urgent Care to check out the wait. Since my throat is scratchy as well, I though Urgent Care might take care of both of us at the same time.

There were only three people in the waiting room.

They finally called us in after TWO HOURS of waiting. Middle Girl and I were SO BORED!

When they called us in, I asked if we would have to wait more in the exam room, because we had only ten minutes until we had to leave to pick up The Boy.

After five minutes, I realized that there wouldn't be time for the test and paying the co-pay, so we just left WITHOUT SEEING A DOCTOR.

Well, that was a good use of two and a half hours.

Later, at the 2:50 pm pediatrician appointment, Middle Girl's test came out positive and she's taking antibiotics and staying home again tomorrow!

My tomorrow, which was supposed to contain two volunteer activities for Middle Girl's class, as well as going to vote,

now contains

going to the doctor (for me) and voting, with two kids in tow. (Streptococcus will NOT keep me away from the polls!)

Hope I can avoid a wait.

____________

I've uploaded the photos onto the computer, but now I am going to bed to rest this scratchy throat. I'm hoping to have time to put together a post tomorrow!

Ready for Halloween!

2008-10-31T08:42:00.000-07:00

The house has been decorated,

(the kids' bedroom doors)

(the black pumpkins are a craft I did with the kids this year)

the pumpkin patch has been visited,

pumpkin goop has been scooped,

jack o'lanterns have been carved,

the school's pumpkin carving contest has been entered,

and The Boy has baked cupcakes for his preschool class party!

(yellow cake, white frosting, yellow sprinkles, red fruit roll, scissors, and Mommy's help!)

We are ready for Halloween!

Politics

2008-10-29T15:11:00.000-07:00

I'm halfway through a big political post that's in draft, which I started a while ago and am now trying to finish.

Even I am bored by it at this point.

Ugh, no more politics, please!

Obama for President!

Straights against 8!
Because I love my children, I'm voting NO on 8!

Rough day

2008-10-27T23:26:00.000-07:00

I'm going to bed now, and I'm happy to say goodbye to today.

Nothing went smoothly, everything was rocky.

Most of it was just little inconveniences, but there was one big thing.

My cat is ill.

This cat.

I took him to the vet Sunday, talked to the vet again by phone today, and it looks like I'll be taking him back in tomorrow. It looks like there will be a lot of tests and procedures in his future.

My heartache and stress have colored everything I've done, written, or said today.

goodnight.

It's been a week?!

2008-10-24T14:58:00.000-07:00

I can't believe I haven't written in a week! It feels like I just wrote that one.

Sooooo... what's been going on with me this week?

Well, I started going to the gym! Good for me, now keep it up.

Big Girl got glasses. She looks cute!

She is amazed that she can actually read the writing on the board! And see the pictures in the librarian's storybook! Poor thing, I wonder how long this has been going on. I'm glad we've remedied that situation.

When she showed up at school with them for the first time, SO EXCITED ABOUT THEM (she LOVES them), her best friend told her she did not like them and kept pouting all day about it when anyone would compliment Big Girl about them. Little snot. She doesn't like it when Big Girl gets any attention. Real nice.

Big Girl didn't seem upset about it, just a little annoyed that her best friend wasn't being supportive even though she was so happy with the glasses, and I said, "I bet it's hard for her to get used to you looking a little different, because she's the person who has been looking at your face all day for several years. She'll get used to them and after a while, they won't bother her anymore. And what matters is what YOU think about them anyway. They're cute, you like them, and you like being able to see, so they are a good thing!" She agreed with me and seemed no less happy with the glasses, so we let it go at that.

A big pat on the back for me, for not saying what I wanted to say about the best friend (I'm sure you can imagine!).

Also this week, Middle Girl showed more signs of being pretty much "back to normal," thank God because it's been MONTHS. Seeing her be silly and giggly again is so good for my heart.

When I think about this week, I realize it was full of little things: band rehearsal, getting The Hubby's car fixed, helping out in Middle Girl's class, putting up Halloween decorations (finally), cleaning the house (sort of)...

I also listened to a discussion on our local NPR station about Yes on Prop 8's latest ad, the one where the law professor tells us that in Massachusetts, teachers were forced to teach same sex marriage in schools, and it will happen here in California. I talked about this ad a few posts ago.

The law professor himself was on, as well as an awesome No on Prop 8 representative (unfortunately I don't remember her name). She did a great job explaining the TRUTH, that Prop 8 won't change anything about what kids learn in school; it's just trying to take away the rights of some of our fellow citizens.

The law professor said that Domestic Partnership already exists, so Yes on Prop 8. Huh? He said that when the court ruled our earlier ban on gay marriage unconstitional, it elevated a certain group to a special status. Huh? Does he not see that he wants gays to be kept in a lower status and making them equal disturbs him? How else to explain it? He said he was not a bigot and was deeply offended by people saying he is. Well, sorry guy, but you have to face the music.

----

I was in line at a McDonald's drive thru yesterday and a few cars ahead of me was a van with a Yes on Prop 8 sign (SIGN. Not bumper sticker) on the car as well as a shoddily hand-made sign saying "KEEP it REAL (man + woman)." I found myself craning my neck to try to get a look at the driver, because I honestly cannot understand - who are these Yes on Prop 8 people? What's wrong with them that they feel threatened by gay marriage? I only saw her arm. It didn't answer any of my questions.

Sigh. Election time makes me feel anxious and irritated. When will this country start thinking of others first, before ourselves? It's hard to be hopeful about this.

I want to make a button for my blog, but my computer doesn't have a good graphics program. I want it to say:

BECAUSE I LOVE MY CHILDREN,
I'M VOTING NO ON PROP 8

meme

2008-10-17T14:21:00.000-07:00

No one tagged me.

But I saw it at Blackbird's.

11 things about me.

1. Clothes Shop: Ann Taylor LOFT, but I am now feeling like moving on. To where?

2. Furniture Shop: I wouldn't want everything to come from the same place. We've got Pottery Barn, IKEA, Cost Plus, antiques stores, an independent furnisher that's been in our town forever (if I had more money I would buy more there).

3. Sweet: The fudge they make at the Oregon Zoo is an annual treat for me (Maple and Pecan are my favorite flavors). I am also into Trader Joe's Milk Chocolate Covered Pretzels and Trader Joe's Kettle Corn. For candy, my favorite is Swedish Fish. Out to a special dinner, I love an apple or pear tart of any sort: galette, crumble, etc.
My mother-in-law thinks I have a sweet tooth. I wouldn't say so, but looking at this entry...

4. City: Quebec City, Salzburg, Venice, Pasadena California.

5. Drink: non-alcoholic - hmmm. I mostly drink water, but I also like Gatorade. Fruit Punch flavor.

6. Music: It's the only way I'm earning any money these days (albeit not much). My varied musical tastes enjoy Sirius, the satellite radio! Right now, I'm feeling like hearing some Blink-182. In high school, I was the Broadway Musicals girl. Am I aging backwards, like in that new Brad Pitt movie? (Looking in mirror.... that would be a NO.)

7. TV Series: The Amazing Race. Project Runway. How I Met Your Mother. The Office. 30 Rock. House MD. Friday Night Lights. Chuck. Top Chef.

8. Film: Ugh, these lists! Why can't I ever just pick one thing? I'll restrain myself on this one.

9. Workout: Just joined the Y. Must start going.

10. Pastries: Maple, Cinnamon, Chocolate, or Pumpkin.

11. Coffee: Can't stand it.

two lovely thoughts for this morning

2008-10-16T09:40:00.000-07:00

As dadgonemad said:

But this particular proposition [Prop 8] seems to have crawled much further up my ass than any other I’ve come across in my twenty years as a registered voter.

For me, there are two things about this election that have crawled farther up my ass than anything has before.

1) Prop. 8. Yes on Prop 8 is "Protect Traditional Marriage." UGH! I'm a firm believer in marriage, and believe that in our society at present, it is not the respected institution that it should be, BUT THAT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH GAY MARRIAGE. Also, I am baffled that the same people who say they want government out of their lives seem to want THEIR RELIGION dictating EVERYONE'S lives. You want to keep government out of it? Great, so do I. Don't tell me who to love or what to do with my body.

2) Sarah Palin. Putting her on the ticket was insulting to me, as a woman. There are plenty of qualified, smart women out there. Why did they choose Sarah Palin for their ticket? Because they could control her, and tell her what to think and what to say, plain and simple. And I am insulted.

PR5 has come to an end.

2008-10-15T22:54:00.000-07:00

Watching the finale of Project Runway 5...

I cannot help but remember how I felt going into Project Runway 1's finale. I wanted Jay to win so badly! I watched nervously, I loved his collection, HE WON, I whooped! Whoo! I thought I would be wearing his clothes by now, but the fashion business is harder than I knew.

Having seen that, the PR finales feel a bit different. Winning PR doesn't guarantee you anything: if the winner does become "the next great American designer," it won't happen for a while. The finale is still fun to watch, having gotten to know the designers during the season, but their careers remain to be seen!

_____________
Kenley's Collection.
I pick out these two as my favorites:

I would LOVE to wear this dress!

This look is not that feasible in the "real world," but what a pretty look. Beautiful shape.

_____________
Korto's Collection.
These two are my favorites:

I would totally buy this dress (if it were a bit longer).

This one was very striking on the runway!

_____________
Leanne's Collection.
Watching this collection, I think to myself: "this is the one that seems to be inventing something new, imagining a new direction."
These two are my picks for favorites.

____________
Announcing the Winner.

It's Leanne!
(The Hubby and I have been referring to her as "Portland Girl" this whole season -- YEAH! Go PDX! Rip City! Stumptown! The City of Roses! Bridgetown!)

I wasn't really rooting for any one of the THREE WOMEN finalists - I liked Leanne and Korto all along - but I do agree with this decision. Well done, judges!

Portland must be excited tonight!

what's on my mind right now

2008-10-14T22:52:00.000-07:00

I saw a new "Yes on Prop 8" ad on TV tonight. It says that in Massachusetts, after they legalized gay marriage, it really did happen that they required teachers to "teach gay marriage in second grade."

OK, first: that "Law Professor" on the ad? He should just wear a big sign across his chest that says, "PREJUDICED." (or how about "I think I might be gay and I'm scared; because why else would I be threatened by the idea of gay marriage") In fact, I think that everyone with a "Yes on 8" sign or bumper sticker might as well just replace it with an "I AM PREJUDICED" sign.

Now, second: it's silly and ludicrous, this argument about teaching gay marriage in public schools. Like they have ever taught one thing about marriage in any way in public schools.

And besides: what is the big deal if a child learns that girls can marry girls OR boys? Are we concerned that a heterosexual man will grow up and marry another man because he learned as a boy that it was not illegal to do so? Knowing that some people are gay when you are a child does not make you gay, IDIOTS.

And more importantly, BEING GAY IS NOT A BAD THING, I.D.I.O.T.S.!!! Feeling horrible about yourself because you think you might be gay but have been taught that it's not okay? Now that's something I don't wish on anybody.

______________

The other thing I watched on TV tonight was "Chuck." (We're a bit behind, and watching on the DVR.)

I think that the writers of "Chuck" are living inside my very own brain. Did I write this show?
1) Chuck went to Stanford.
2) Chuck wears Converse Chuck Taylors (((LOVE))).
3) Huey Lewis & the News music has been featured prominently in two episodes in a row, now!
4) Whoever cast Zachary Levi in this show did so knowing that he is way too hawt to be a nerd, but cast him anyway, as EYE CANDY FOR ME.

Gollygarshdarnedit, I love that show.

Progress

2008-10-09T21:55:00.000-07:00

Here is where things stand today:

Definitely coming along!

The first few days, Dino just hissed at Turbo and then left the room, giving us the cold shoulder and his patented glare of disapproval.

Then, he started to hiss and swat at Turbo. (Turbo seemed unfazed.)

The next step was Turbo starting to swat at Dino (mostly trying to get him to play & wrestle). Then Dino would bait Turbo with his tail, get him to pounce on his tail, and then hiss and swat at him when he did!

Finally, Dino consented to being in the same room without any drama.

Turbo still wants to get him to play!

We're not at the two-kitties-snuggling phase yet, but I hope it's on the horizon.
____

Here are a couple of other cute pictures:

That's a tired kitty!

Commenter's Remorse

2008-10-09T08:45:00.001-07:00

Have you ever been reading a popular blogger and a post touches on one of your pet peeves and you just HAVE to vent a little?

And you start venting in the comment box and then you lose track of how long your comment is because the box doesn't really show you?

And then you hit "post" and you see a ridiculously long comment sitting there, with your name on it?

And you think, boy, do I sound lame....?

It's probably just me... you guys are all such good writers that you can keep track of your thoughts & words....

BUT I DID JUST THAT TODAY OVER AT BOSSY'S.

Don't go look! I'm embarrassed! (Well, go look at Bossy's today, just please ignore my comment! It's such a stupid pet peeve of mine, too...)

You know how sometimes communicating by email is not the best way to go, because the recipient could misconstrue your meaning and your tone?

Well, I think commenting can be even worse that way. I try to be succinct and I think that can make my comments come across sharply.

(Although I WISH I had been more succinct at Bossy's today...)

Oh, the perils of the internet...

Friday Report, written by Middle Girl (some in third person)

2008-10-04T20:09:00.000-07:00

Middle Girl has fun at school because she is good at reading.

And the new kitten named Turbo is fun. Two times he fell asleep on me. Now he has a collar.

Today we were working with Q. I drew a picture of a queen. I got finished just in time.

At recess the boys who were mean the other days decided to play our game today. We played dogs and owners. The dogs crawl around and the owners feed them using play food from the play house. I was an owner. I had lots of dogs: David, Marshall, Eric, and James. They were not as well behaved as the other people's dogs.

We went to music and we sang a song I love called "Alleluia."

I saw Marshall's new puppy with his mom picking up Marshall. She was a French bulldog named Coco. I got to hold the leash and walk the puppy.

At home I made lunch. Carrots, yogurt, and of course raspberries. Grandma will say, "she ate raspberries? Mmmmmmmmmmmm."

Now I've Gone and Done It

2008-09-30T23:32:00.000-07:00

There's a three-month-old baby living with us.

(drumroll...)

This is Turbo!

He is from the pet store, and I met him there about a week ago. I thought he was sweet and friendly (and he reminded me of my beloved childhood cat). The Hubby and I had been talking about getting a kitten for a few months, thinking that our 11-year-old cat Dino would enjoy some companionship (I should now change that to "hoping," though). We also thought it would be fun for the people in the family!

I told The Hubby about this kitten, but then I hesitated, thinking that I should go to the Humane Society instead. I thought about it for a few days, and decided to go back to the pet store, since I knew he was friendly and since he had been an abandoned kitty and would end up at the Humane Society anyway if no one bought him.

I wanted to surprise the kids. So, while the girls were at gymnastics class on Monday, The Boy and I went to the pet store and got him. Then, when the girls came out of class, I was holding our pet carrier and The Boy was shouting, "we got a new kitty!" It took a minute to sink in, but then there was much jumping up and down and cheering!

It was hard to concentrate on homework (or much of anything) the rest of the evening. The New Kitten did a lot of exploring, and a lot of LOUD purring. I remarked to The Boy, "he has a loud motor!" and The Boy liked the idea of a cat having a motor.

We couldn't focus enough to think of a name that night, although Big Girl wanted him to have a name before she went to school in the morning. But we didn't want to rush into anything!

Big Girl asked everyone at school for name ideas, wrote them down, and came home with a long list of suggestions. I came up with a list of ideas, too.

We were thinking of things like Smokey, Stormy, Rocky, Dusty, Thunder, Diesel, Harley... Basically, names inspired by either the gray color or by the loud "motor." Turbo was decided upon, being nobody's favorite, but one that everybody liked.

This is a snuggly kitten who loves people. Can you tell?

Time Alone with The Boy

2008-09-29T13:00:00.000-07:00

We actually have time alone together every Tuesday and Thursday morning, but we had some unexpected time together when Middle Girl went over to a friend's house for lunch.

The Boy got to choose what he wanted to eat for lunch, and he decided on scrambled eggs, and asked if he could help make them.

I don't usually have the kids help prepare the food, just because I don't think I can keep tabs on them well enough; but with only one, it's really fun to have them help make the meal!

The Boy cracked the eggs and beat them with the whisk. While I tended to them on the stove, he did a very careful job cutting up cucumbers!

We sat down to enjoy our lunch together, and as you might guess, this time he didn't resist eating anything on his plate! He was excited about those cucumbers!

A simple thing can be really nice.

The World is Waiting

2008-09-28T23:43:00.000-07:00

Weekend viewing

We watched the movie "Persepolis." It's stunning and fantastic! It is visually gripping, clever, a real work of art. I found the ending to be abrupt, but overall I enjoyed the experience.

Tonight I watched the season premiere of "The Amazing Race." Ah, I love this show! It feels so good when the race starts. "Good Luck. Travel Safe.... GO!" I love hearing those words!

I first saw "The Amazing Race" in the hospital after The Boy was born. I believe it was Season Six. (Tonight we started Season Thirteen.) I was instantly hooked, and continued to watch it when we were home, and I was nursing him at bed time.

That was also when I got hooked on my other reality show LOVER, "Project Runway." It was the middle of the night, I was up for a feeding, and I turned on "Project Runway." After that episode ended, another came on, and I kept watching! That was Season One. (Right now we are in Season Five.)

Ah, memories! (Sing it with me...)

Walking to Kindergarten Pick-Up

2008-09-24T14:07:00.000-07:00

Walking down the street at noon each day, on my way to pick up Middle Girl at Kindergarten, I have a warm fuzzy feeling. I can't wait to see her! Walking along, thinking about how she'll see me at the classroom door, and come running to me with a huge smile because she had a fun day at school, and how I'll hear all about it as we walk back home. I walk hand in hand with The Boy, while he tells me that he can't wait to turn four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven, twelve, but then stops and looks up at me and says, "but WHY do I have to be twelve? I don't like all of those numbers. I just want to be ten." And I say, "Okay, then you can!" as I chuckle to myself and continue thinking of Middle Girl, and now we're getting very close to seeing her!

And then, when I get there, and the classroom door opens, I see her waiting with her bright hopeful eyes looking for me. Then she hurries out to where I am standing... and...

whines. "Mommy, I want to have a playdate right now." "Mommy, I don't want to have a rest today." "Mommy, I'm hungry." "Mommy, I'm upset because so-and-so and so-and-so are having a playdate." "Mommy, school is boooorrriiiing." "Mommy, it's hot."

And then, the next day, as I walk to pick her up at noon, I find myself smiling as I look forward to seeing her and hearing her tell me how much fun she had at school.

Beyond all reason, I guess I am a Mothering Optimist.

Hightailing it to Adventureland

2008-09-22T09:47:00.000-07:00

This weekend, we spent a day at Disneyland. The Hubby's company had arranged for everyone to go. After arriving and picking up our tickets, they handed everyone a cap with the company logo on it. The company is very secretive and does not put their name on anything -- just the logo which is a simple shape.

So ... there were thousands of us roaming around Disneyland and California Adventure that day, wearing identical caps embroidered with the simple shape. Like some sort of Cult of the Trapezoid had come to melt the minds of everyone waiting in the lines.

We had a Disneyland Day Full of Firsts!
We went on the Finding Nemo ride for the first time, as well as the Toy Story Mania ride (which was definitely the winner out of those two new ones).
We discovered that The Boy measures right up to the line, as in the You Must Be This Tall To Ride This Ride line! That was a very exciting discovery!
With this new knowledge, we decided to take everybody on Space Mountain. Yes, this would be a first for all three kids... BUT ... there is a story. First of all, to understand the story, you must know that the cars on Space Mountain are three rows of two seats. And we have two parents and three kids in our family. OK, and ... scene: We are getting close to the front of the line. The girls are getting nervous and both say they will only go on if they can sit next to Daddy or Mommy. The Boy is saying he wants to go on the ride, but 1) he is three, and 2) he doesn't know what he is getting himself into (he has no idea what this ride is). So Mommy and Daddy want him to sit next to one of us. We suggest that the girls sit together and have Mommy and The Boy in the row in front of them, and Daddy in the row behind them. The ride attendant sends us to Lanes 1-3. The girls say NOOOOOOOOOOOO! THEY EACH NEED TO SIT NEXT TO A PAAAAARRRRREEEEEEEENNNTT! The car is ready for us to board. It is decided (real fast) that Mommy and The Boy need to hop in and Daddy will wait with the girls for us to come out and then go on. So Mommy and The Boy hop in.

Well, what do you think? Did The Boy enjoy his first time on Space Mountain?

No, he did not.
I couldn't see him in the dark during the ride, so I held his hand and shouted "Wheee!" the whole time so he would feel me in the dark and hear that I was having fun, in case he was feeling scared, but I had absolutely no idea if he was liking it or not. He wasn't making any sound. At the end, I asked him if he liked it, and he very calmly said, "No, I didn't like that one. I do not want to ride it again." He didn't seem upset, but he definitely stuck to that opinion.

Now it was time for the rest of our group to ride. When we saw Daddy and the girls, The Boy informed them that "That ride is too scary." Middle Girl decided she did not want to find out for herself, which was perfect because Daddy could go with Big Girl and I could wait with Middle Girl and The Boy.

So what do you think? Did Big Girl enjoy her first time on Space Mountain?

OH, YES. Yes, she did!
She was exhilarated and declared it her favorite of the day! Way to go, Big Girl!

Another first was on Soarin' Over California. This one is a big family favorite, and since The Boy was finally tall enough, we could all go on together for the first time! It was fantastic, of course, and The Boy loved it!

We also got to eat dinner at the Blue Bayou restaurant. It was everyone's first time except for me (growing up, my family ALWAYS ate dinner there, every time we went to Disneyland). Since the company Day at Disneyland had been planned quite some time ago, I had been able to call ahead and make reservations, and I was very excited to eat there again, like coming home after all these years! When we walked in, the darkness and mood made Middle Girl nervous, but I assured her that we would just be enjoying the peaceful nighttime river scene with the pretty lanterns strung above our heads, watching the boats go by... we would not see the boats go down the waterfalls to where the Pirates of the Caribbean are. After reassuring her that we did not have to go on the Pirates ride, we could just eat here and then walk back out the door, she was fine and we all enjoyed our yummy dinners and our dessert shaped like a pirate ship.

There was another first, an unfortunate one that I could have lived without.
The last thing we did was go to the Enchanted Tiki Room, even though The Boy had already said he was tired and wanted to go. Since both Middle Girl and The Boy looked like they were sleeping with their eyes open through the Tiki Room, and Main Street was filling up with people sitting and waiting for the fireworks, we decided we had better book it out of Disneyland or we might not be able to get out until after the fireworks.
We got out of the park and I realized that I did not have our bag. I had left it sitting in the Tiki Room. The Hubby and I looked at each other, trying to figure out if we could leave anyway, not wanting to deal with how to get it. When we realized the car keys were in it (and since we preferred to keep our camera), we knew I had to run back inside.
And RUN I did. Swimming upstream against the flow of the crowds (after waiting in line to get in the gates - ugh), I hightailed it into Adventureland. At the Tiki Room, I told the guy "I left my bag in there!" and he pulled it out of a storage closet! Huzzah!
I called The Hubby to tell him SUCCESS! ON MY WAY BACK TO PARK EXIT! and ran back out to the family. Hubby was Shocked, Shocked I Tell You that I had been so fast. "You must have run!" he said.

OK, so first time leaving the bag inside Disneyland and having to go back in for it ten minutes before fireworks. AND THE LAST TIME.

Ike and my IRL blogger friend

2008-09-12T13:00:00.000-07:00

Update! My friends rode out the storm at a hotel further inland. The hotel roof sustained more damage than their own house in the evacuation zone! They have lots of cleanup to do, but the damage seems to be confined to the fence in the back yard.

I have a friend who lives in the Houston-Galveston area. She is a professor of marine biology, one of my heroes, and one of those soul-mate type friends.

I don't know if she has been evacuated... I am thinking about her constantly and hoping to get some news soon.

I found out very recently that her husband has a blog for the Houston Chronicle. Daddy Daze is about being the father of a three-year old daughter. He has spent some of those years as the primary caregiver, and I love him almost as much as I love his wife. The sadness I felt when they moved away from here is still raw, five years after the fact!

Hurrah for blogging Daddies!

updates

2008-09-11T23:48:00.000-07:00

Wednesday, The Boy's second day of preschool, I did manage to "get something done." I went to Home Depot and bought a bunch of new flowers to replace all of the dead things in my front yard. Today (with my little digging helper) I dug out a bunch of the dead stuff and old roots and tried to loosen up some dirt, and then ran out of time. It might be alright - I think that the gardener will plant them when he comes by in the morning, because sometimes he does that if he finds new flowers that I haven't planted yet. But also? Sometimes he doesn't. Yeah, I don't know and I don't have a clear idea of what it is we pay him to do!

Also at Home Depot the other day, I bought a towel bar. See, the story is that over the summer I bought a towel bar to match the towel ring in our upstairs bathroom, and handed it to The Hubby: "install this while I'm in Oregon."

And then when he did, I saw that I bought the wrong finish. Satin Nickel and Chrome do not match. The Hubby did not notice this. (Men!)

I'm sure you'll agree that I could not live with non-matching towel holders in one bathroom! But I didn't want The Hubby to find out that I had bought the wrong one (I have my pride, yo).

So, I bought the correct one and installed it myself.

Sneakin' around, saving my home-decorating face!

So have you ever been at Home Depot with a big bag of soil or something, and no one offers to help you get it in your car? Well, I'm probably to blame for that. You see, I had a big bag of bark in my cart, and as I pulled up to my trunk, the man leaving the car next to mine offered to help me with the bag. "No, thanks, I don't need any help!" I said. "I put it in the cart, I can get it out." And I swung that thing in my trunk easy as pie! (Dear Guy at Home Depot: it was nice of you to offer. I am sorry I responded with such attitude. I have a thing about doing things for myself. Please don't let this experience stop you from offering to help people in the future!)

The Boy update: The Boy made a new friend at preschool on Wednesday. (Yay!) He has an unusual name. The Boy cannot remember this name, and asked me "What is his name again? My friend?" approximately 482 times today.

Middle Girl update: Middle is liking Kindergarten and making new friends, as expected! Emotions-wise, she may be doing a little better... The tummy hasn't been bothering her, but she is still crying and clingy. Time will tell...

Big Girl update: Let's just say that apparently third grade = all grown up.

Upcoming weekend: We are driving upstate (ha, we don't actually say that out here) to The Hubby's cousin's wedding. We are looking forward to seeing my mother-in-law for a couple of days. Unlike several others, I am looking forward to this wedding, because there has been some family drama surrounding these wedding plans and since it's not my family (and I no longer have to sing in the wedding), I can just sit back and watch the show!

The First Day of School

2008-09-08T23:26:00.000-07:00

Middle Girl was up bright and early, eager to get dressed in her ~~crisp, new~~ hand-me-down uniform.

She seemed excited, but not nervous.

The Hubby went into work late today so he could accompany us on the big first day.

Seeing my two girls, both smartly dressed in their school uniforms, took my breath away just as much as the sudden realization during breakfast that it would be just The Boy and I walking back home, for the first time. Whoa.

In the Kindergarten classroom, she did get a bit nervous. No one but her parents would have noticed, because she hides it well. All of the parents were very nicely asked to head out, and Kindergarten began!

At pick-up time, she was ready to come home. She said she liked Kindergarten and was excited to go back tomorrow, but she seemed a little tired and reserved. When we got home, there was a cookie bouquet waiting for her, sent by my mother-in-law. The Hubby called to talk to Middle Girl and hear about her day. "It was good."

Day One went well.

As for The Boy, well, there were some tears at preschool drop-off. I stayed for a few minutes to watch him (he couldn't see me), and seeing him kind of wander around the playground alone, trying to figure out what to play with, made me a bit sad - so I left. I knew it was fine (he really doesn't mind playing by himself, unlike Middle Girl, and the other kids looked pretty much the same), but I still found it hard to watch.

When I picked him up, he was actively participating in Story Time, and the teacher told me he was shy for most of the morning but had started to warm up near the end and even played with another child. He tells us he likes preschool, but he's glad he gets a day off tomorrow.

And what did I do with my morning? You know, I was kind of drained so I went home and just sort of sat there. I'll "get things done" in the upcoming days, but I didn't expect that from myself on this first day!

Tomorrow is the big day

2008-09-07T12:01:00.000-07:00

One more day until Kindergarten.

Since Middle Girl's drama and tears are still going strong, The Hubby and I are glad that it's almost here.

I still can't stop saying that I "never would have guessed" that she would have trouble with this. It seems out of character for her.

You think you know your children's personalities, and they go and change the game on you!

____

In related news, tomorrow is also The Boy's first day of preschool. I am feeling more confident about that than I was a few days ago, because Friday was his Visiting Day. He didn't want to go, and held my leg and buried his face in me when we went there, but by the time we left, he was telling me how much he likes his teachers and his classroom. We gave Daddy a call so The Boy could tell him all about it.

I'm sure he'll be nervous again at drop-off, but Visiting Day was definitely a good thing!

____

Today we're doing a whole lot of nothing, which I think is good for Middle Girl. We're just having Unscheduled Family Time around the house: swimming, playing pretend with the siblings, coloring, reading books. Nice and low-key.

____

Wish us good luck for tomorrow morning!

The First Day of School (for Big Girl)

2008-09-04T11:37:00.001-07:00

Yesterday, Wednesday, was Big Girl's first day of third grade! She is so excited about the year, her teacher, learning cursive... She's feeling very big because "we're the oldest on the playground!" (Her school divides recess and lunch so that grades 1-3 are on the playground together. The older grades have their recess and lunch at a slightly different time.)

During the summer, we updated her uniforms, buying new ones in a bigger size. Well, not exactly a bigger size, because the uniform store has changed vendors and they use a different pattern for the jumpers. It's still a size 8, but it's cut VERY differently. Seeing her in her new jumper yesterday, I decided that it didn't fit her right. It was just too long, and she looked kind of silly.

So, last night, even though I had ALREADY taken in her skorts (this kid is very thin and has no tush), I hauled out the sewing machine again. I took up the jumpers' hems (having to re-press the pleats), and took in a little at the waistline so the torso portion wouldn't be so long.

Mission accomplished!

_____________

Tuesday was "Drop-In Day," when the kids stop by school in the morning to say hello to their new teacher and put their supplies in their desk. The Hubby and I walked over with both girls. The Boy had no patience for it, but was forced to come along.

It seemed to help somewhat with Middle Girl's fears and worries, especially since her friend A. will be sitting at the same table.

The poor thing is so worried about Kindergarten, and has been since June, that she has given herself an anxious tummy. The butterfly feeling makes her cry even more. It's been a tough week so far, and even though talking through her fears (she's worried that no one will play with her, that she will get in trouble with the teacher, that Kindergarten will be too hard...) really does help, every day a new fear seems to crop up. This is when I really earn my Mommy pay.

At our school, Kindergarten starts the week after the rest of the school. (Middle Girl's first day will be Monday.) I think this is smart, because the rest of the school gets the first-days-energy out of the way before the Kindergarteners arrive with their own crazy energy. I think it helps make the atmosphere a little calmer for the little ones.

However, this year I have discovered that it's not so great. Yesterday, when we woke up to take Big Girl to school, Middle Girl said, "I wish I was going to school too!" and I realized that she really wants to get rid of these fears! She wants to just go to Kindergarten and see what it's like so she can stop worrying! Oh, man, now you can't imagine how much I am wishing the same thing.

Just a few more days...
(Deep breath)

Marbles, where are you?

2008-08-29T15:21:00.000-07:00

Sometimes I wonder what's wrong with me!

Last year at this time, a volunteer position was foisted onto me without any warning. "You're coordinating the program, and you need to make instruction manuals and hold a training session in the next 2-3 weeks." Um, wha?

So anyway, I did coordinate the program last year, and I did a tremendous job and seriously impressed the people who foisted the job on me. "You're awesome!" was said to me many times during the school year.

At the end of the school year, I told them that I would be willing to do the job again "if they needed me to."

But I'd prefer to be just one of the volunteers, not the coordinator of the volunteers.
-----

Today I found out that one of my volunteers from last year will be coordinating this year. Great news! I am off the hook!

Wheeeeee!!!

So how come a tiny part of me feels a little put out? My brain, she is a weirdo.

-----

We all like to feel needed, indispensible... Don't we? No, just li'l ol' insecure me?

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So, I'm back from my MONTH LIVING AT MY PARENTS' HOUSE in Portland. The computer situation up there went from bad to worse and no blogging was done.

Except for one dead houseplant and a pile of mail on the coffee table, The Hubby held down the fort here quite capably.

The girls did not want to leave Oregon, just like always. The Boy, though, began to miss his Daddy, his bed, his cat, and his friend S. about halfway through our time up there.

I've been home since Tuesday afternoon, and here's what I have done since then:

Unpack everything by Tuesday night (oh except for that one shopping bag on the counter).

Swim in the pool in our backyard! We missed swimming!

Watch all of the "Project Runway" episodes that I missed. (The quick reaction: Keith, you done got yourself kicked off. Man, never design for someone else, stay true to your aesthetic!)

Take The Boy to the dentist. (Oh, Huzzah and Glory Be, he actually opened his mouth and let them clean his teeth! This could not have been more of a 180 from 6 months ago, when we could NOT get him to sit in the chair OR open his mouth and there was A LOT of crying. The dentist ended up giving up that time! This time, The Boy was more cooperative and quieter than either of his sisters ever were! I was one proud mama, and a little shocked! Out of my mouth flew a lot of "I'm so proud!"s and "You did a great job!"s)

Big Girl arranged a playdate for herself. I had to drive across town at 6:00 to pick her up.

Went to Old Navy to get socks for all three kids (we need a complete sock overhaul around here), only to find that they no longer have the right kind of socks nor sell them in economy-size packs like they used to. Unless this particular O N's employees are clueless.

Had a slew of kids over for a big playdate extravaganza. Including lunch.

Four words: Neighborhood. Water. Balloon. Fight. With the attendant Water Balloon Filling session. (All the kids were so cute! Especially the part where they had a contest to see who could pick up the most balloon shards. They got the neighboorhood cleaned up lickety-split.)

Hair appointments made!

More playdates (in fact, there's one happening here RIGHT NOW).

Read approximately 350 blog posts to try to catch up with y'all!

----------------------------------------

Coming Up:

So, How Was Oregon?

update from Oregon

2008-08-04T09:23:00.000-07:00

It's been really difficult getting online in Oregon. Being at my parents' house for a month is kind of like camping; camping in a great big house. There's no cable TV (we'll be watching the Olympics soon, so that's okay, but I miss my Project Runway! The home TV is Tivo-ing it), only dial-up internet access (can you say S-L-O-W? can you say F-R-O-Z-E-N?), and my dad does not believe in turning on the air conditioning. Ah, but the kids love being with their grandparents, cousins, aunts and uncles -- they can't get enough -- so it's all worth it to be sure.

I've been writing down my thoughts each day on these puzzles that I like to do when I'm at my folks' house.

We ended up doing the whole drive in one day. We left at 7:30 am and got there at 11:30 pm. A 16-hour travel, including stops for potty and meals. It was the first time we used the headphone system for our DVD player! The kids couldn't really wear the headphones until now! Movies, books, and ...

Thus far in our Oregon visit, the main event has been visiting with the cousins! We went to see the brand-new nephew, 5 days old. My sister-in-law was holding her new baby (her third boy) and I was overcome with a wave of postpartum memories. I went over to where The Hubby was standing for a hug, and to my surprise, when he hugged me I started crying. Hmmm. I didn't know that would happen. I don't cry easily, but I guess it really hit me that I'm done having babies!

I have also been enjoying my niece, who is now 10.5 months old. I haven't seen her since Christmastime, when she was 3.5 months old and a lot less social!

Ack! Gotta go, that's it for now!

Something's Not Right

2008-07-26T08:52:00.000-07:00

On Thursday, I decided not to call my friend to confirm that she would be bringing Big Girl home from theater camp, because she had been doing it for seven straight days and I didn't want to be an annoying pest.

When they were about 10 minutes late, I was starting to worry.

When they were 20 minutes late, I called her cell phone.

She was picking up her younger daughter from school and taking her to the pediatrician. She had called her husband to ask him to call the theater camp and tell them to send her older daughter to Extended Care, but she had forgotten about my daughter.

I quickly hung up and ran out the door to get my Big Girl. When I got there, both girls were there waiting, and had long been the only children left. I told the two adults who were waiting with them what had happened, and they said they had not gotten a call about Friend's Daughter.

The Extended Care children had already gone over to the theater to help with the work being done over there, so everyone agreed it would be better for Friend's Daughter to come home with me.

When I got home with both girls, I called both Friend (left a message) and Friend's Husband to tell them where their oldest child was.

After a couple of hours, Friend's Husband came to pick up Friend's Daughter.
_____

I've written about this dispassionately, but at the time, I was full of emotion. Seething might cover it. I tried not to let the girls see it.

Mostly I was mad at myself, because I should know better than to trust this particular friend. She flakes out on me more than she comes through, lately. There's always some drama going on. The Hubby was so angry when he got home and heard the story. Then he said, "something is not quite right with her lately. Do you think she is okay?"

I really have no idea - I never see her anymore. When I have her kids over, hoping she'll stay for a little while for a chat, it turns out to be her husband who shows up, drops them off, and says "I'll be back in a few hours."
_____

The two families went out for pizza together last night, so the kids could spend some time together before we leave for our month in Oregon. I felt that the adults needed a normal dinner together at this time, so I didn't have the kind of serious discussion with her that I think we need to have at some point. But one interesting thing happened: she said that she found out from her sister that her mom was worried that something was wrong with her because she had slept a lot during her recent visit to her mom's house. At that point, her husband said that her mom had said the same thing to him. She thought it was funny, because she has two kids so of course she's tired. The Hubby and I shared glances, though.

Oh, and she did apologize about forgetting my daughter, including during that first phone call. But she didn't seem to realize what a big deal it might be to me that my daughter was waiting around there, forgotten. NOT. OKAY. Her kids may be used to that sort of thing, but I don't do that to mine. Now I am kicking myself again about not calling before pick-up time to confirm! It was the first day that I didn't make that phone call, of course.
____

Tonight is the theater camp performance. Big Girl has to wear her hair in rollers all day, so I'm about to go set them. We're all packing and getting ready for our trip today, then will go see the show tonight.

Our plan is to leave in the morning...